I love my friend.

July 13, 2009 2:59pm CST
I fell in love with my friend, but I can not say it to her because I am afraid that it will ruin our friendship. Should I pursue my feelings, or just hide it?
4 responses
@DivePeak (30)
• Fiji
14 Jul 09
I can relate to your experience, as I've been there a few times myself. I used to say nothing. In one case I found out (years later) that she felt the same and also said nothing because she didn't want to risk losing the friendship. What a waste! Since then I've decided to speak up, and I've learned that true friendship isn't destroyed by saying you're interested in more. Yes, sometimes things get a little weird for a while, especially when the girl had no idea, but all those friendships survived and bounced back better than ever. In another instance, my friend responded with, "Thank God you finally said it!". She didn't feel the same way, but could sense what I was thinking and was glad to get it out in the open so I could get over her. I know it's scary and it feels like there is so much at stake, but I seriously think it's better to take the risk and tell her. If she says, "me too", great! If she doesn't, then let her know that you like her but you're not obsessed over her and that the friendship is still very important to you. Then be prepared to give her a bit of space for a little while if she needs it.
@devmitra (274)
• India
14 Jul 09
The first thing you should consider is that,how long have you been friends together.If you love her truly,then do express yourself before her.If she responses in affirmative,then its perfect and if she doesnt,then please dont press your feelings on her .The more you handle such matters with patience and ease the more you are at the better end..all the best
• Canada
14 Jul 09
Friendship is the basis to a healthy relationship anyway. I say take the chance and pursue it, maybe she feels more and u will take it further. You guys don't need to force each other though, if one doesn't feel the same. And unfortunately if she didn't feel for you in that way, you may have to try to give up your loving feelings for her if you wanted to keep the friendship. Continually pursuing someone if they are not interested, will turn them off and you may risk your good friendship.
@mrakobesie (1246)
• United States
13 Jul 09
As long as she is available, i think you should go for it... show her how you feel about her, actions talk louder then words... I'm with a guy who used to be my friend, he was in love with me for a long time, so eventually we both had too much to drink and we both are the happiest people in the world...