Restaurant ettiquette

September 6, 2009 5:52am CST
When eating at a restaurant my father always told me it is rude to carry on your conservation while the waiter comes over. I am not talking when the waiter comes to take your order (which would be rude to just talk over him). Im talking about when the waiter comes over take plates away or bring drinks etc. In my family the convesation stops while he does this and then starts again when the waiter leaves. When with other families or with friends this does not happen. I was just wondering if anyone else does this?
2 people like this
7 responses
• India
6 Sep 09
This is something new. Only when you are ordering you food, you have to maintain your silence, that is because, if your all talking when ordering, he might be confused, but other wise, it is quite normal to have a conversation, when the food is being served or when the plates are cleared. As far as I am concerned this does not happen in my family.
7 Sep 09
I was wondering if it was a cultural thing. My father is from India making me half Indian, So i was wondering if it was part of Indian culture? Im guessing you are from Indian origin by your name? If so, i guess its just my dad :P
• India
7 Sep 09
Ah, the secret is out, all the Indian fathers, want their children to keep silent when they have the food. As you have mentioned it is some thing like a cultural thing, where the youngsters are not supposed to speak in front of elder during a meal. Make your father happy, keep quiet during the meals.
• United States
6 Sep 09
Hmmm I had never heard that. I have worked as a server a lot and, personally, I find it very uncomfortable when people stop talking when I come to refresh their drinks or clear away empty plates. As if I am interrupting them. Or maybe they are talking about me, the way people who are talking about you stop when you walk in the room... Now that I hear this, maybe they are just doing the same thing as your family but having not known about that practice, it was terribly awkward.
7 Sep 09
Haha, I thought that the waiters may have felt like this. Thats why I always feel awkward when we do it. Im glad to see my instincts weren't wrong :). Maybe other families were doing this too. However, I've never seen any other familiy do it and judging by the responces here, I'm guessing its only a select few :P. Thanks for the responce, I'm glad I could get an opinion from a waiteress who has experienced this :)
@Ritchelle (3790)
• Philippines
11 Sep 09
i didn't know about that etiquette. but i guess there is a special reason for it. the only etiquette i know that comes with restaurant ordering is not to place your elbows on the table. i don't see anything offensive with this so i don't really follow it. i'd be looking more miserable if i have straight back and hands on lap anyway .
• Philippines
6 Sep 09
Whoa! i didn't know that. when ever we go to restaurants we don't usually talk that much, but the problem is that waiters don't come to often in our table unless called.. but i do experience this that when ever the waiters take the plates, they are still usually talking..
@Quiplet (255)
• United States
6 Sep 09
I don't think it's rude, unless the conversation is interrupting the server from doing his/her duties for other guests. Keep your eyes open, be aware of the server's body language. That language will tell you if he/she is enjoying the conversation or is trying to move on while still being polite to you. In other words, on a busy night, the server's station is probably full. That's the time to keep the conversation cool but polite.
@olivemom (21)
• United States
7 Sep 09
Hmm..not sure about the proper etiquette but as long as you stop mid-conversation to at least say thank you, I think it would be okay.
@prinzcy (32322)
• Malaysia
6 Sep 09
I don't know, never heard about that. But I do know it's rude to keep someone standing and waiting while we chat like he/she doesn't exist. Besides, I don't like to have a person that's not in the conversation to stand and hear (since he/she's there, of course he/she hear whatever we talk about as well) I'll make an order and then can continue chatting at ease.