How do you manage conflict in your daily life?

@verena (56)
Indonesia
November 22, 2009 11:12am CST
Actually, i don't like to have conflict with someone. But if i have to be in conflict, i used to keep quiet and say no words. I believe that in conflict situation, words sometime make the situation worse. I think it's better to keep calm. Maybe by keeping calm ourselves, we'll help the opposite to be calm too, so that we can think clearly about the problems we have. It doesn't always work, but at least with that way, i feel that i won't hurt someone. That's my way. How about your way?
1 person likes this
10 responses
@orochi (318)
• Denmark
22 Nov 09
I just believe that if you stay calm and don't go around having the problems hanging over your head i believe karma will get you and make things even worse so i just sorta try to let go of my problems to just move on
• Mexico
23 Nov 09
Hi orochi: i agree with you when you said that you have to face conflicts and not hide but at the same time it's good to know how to face these conflicts in the better way and not simply discuss with a person or even to win an enemy just because you can not communicate in a civilize way you thoughts. But i think you're answer is good, i'll add you as a friend. Have a nice day.
@hisoka147 (606)
• Philippines
23 Nov 09
If staying calm and saying no words at all is how you manage conflict then I guess it wont solve anything. It's like you don't want to the situation to be resolve. As for me, the way how I manage conflict in my daily life is to face it and try to defend your self. It is because this is a part of our daily life. Conflict contributes in our experience to become more stronger in relationship, trust, love and etc...
• United Kingdom
23 Nov 09
Hi verena, I too don't like any kind of conflict with anyone. I'm quiet natured and I tend to remain calm when it comes to conflict. As you say, if you start saying something then this may add fuel to the fire as it were. Who wants problems? I think it's best to remain calm and politely walk away from the situation. It's perfectly acceptable to become angry at times as this is a normal reaction when we are hurt or someone has crossed us. However, I want to live my life to the full and don't want it to be suddenly cut short! You just don't know who you may get into conflict with! Andrew
• Mexico
23 Nov 09
Hi verena: i think you are in a wise position and that you know how to manage some conflicts but in some cases you have to make your point or view because it's your right to do it specially when this touch you, for example if the other person is making a difamation you need to talk and to discuss if it's necessari. In my case i usually wait some time and talk to the person of the conflict when he/ she is calmed down and we can talk in a rational way.
@getbrowser (1715)
• China
23 Nov 09
I agree with you completely. If we are getting into some conflicts, to keep quiet is the best way to solve the problem, or, the situation may become worse if we chip on our shoulder. Lookers-on see more than players. When we have conflict with someone, we should keeo quiet and let opponents calm down. Usually, the cause of conflict is lack of communication, so, the best way to solve the problem is to sit down and learn to communicate with each other, which is a wiser way to resolve conflicts. At times we could not differentiate between sense and recreance. In fact, to keep calm is the action of sense indeed.
• United States
22 Nov 09
i would do the same your a cool person dude you know it every body is cool and i do get a lot of conflicts in my life so were cool and you dont have to be cool to be cool
@Pplaya123 (126)
• United States
22 Nov 09
When I have conflicts in my life, I try to stay as calm as possible. It usually helps to think of all the positives in your life. And most of the time, they really outnumber the negatives. A lot of conflicts are temporary, but many of your positives will last forever. You have to think about all the people who have it worse and then you will think of yourself as lucky.
@anawar (2406)
• United States
22 Nov 09
Hi verena! Great insight! When one person is calm, the peace flows through everyone involved. Words can hurt. However, it's fine to be calm, but it's not good to hold in your feelings. Try to express them in a positive way. I understand you don't want to hurt anyone and I respect that. But, don't hurt yourself by denying your feelings. A few techniques I use: I don't place blame on anyone. No one is right or wrong. In the work place, I tell people that I understand why they are upset and I would be upset also, if I was them. Those words diffuse any conflicts. Everyone is on the same side and the problem is mutual. If you have strong feelings that you can't express, write the person a letter and then throw the letter away. You release your feelings without hurting anyone and chances are, you'll feel better after writing the letter. You didn't specify what conflict you were thinking of, and I hope my comments addressed your situation. travel lightly, anawar
• Philippines
22 Nov 09
I do my best to get my message across so that the other party will understand. Sometimes, I lose my temper depending on the situation. Then, I cool down, and do my best to move on as if nothing happened. This gives us time to ponder. Then, it is easy to get back to normal. I do my best not to let the conflict last. I do not want to have a soured relationship but I see to it that I stand up for what is right.
@aerous (13474)
• Philippines
22 Nov 09
If I have conflict to someone else. I will be asking for what the reason of that conflict and resolve it immediately with a good words. Just make sure to talk to a person that I have conflict with to talk about the solutions of the problem that cause us in conflict. If the person don't say any justification I give way to resolve that case...I don't want someone hurt because of me or don't want someone have conflict with me...Have a nice day!