Being Told Off
By Rhazelle
@Rhazelle (356)
Canada
February 18, 2010 9:17pm CST
So a few days ago I kind of eavesdropped on a conversation between two people at school, and it's been bugging me for a while, so I just thought I'd ask MyLot a question about this.
The two people were a male and a female, and it seemed like the male was telling off the female for something she did. Except when he talked to her, the girl barely got any words in. He just kept going and going and telling her off and didn't seem to let her explain herself, and she just seemed really sheepish and quiet and whenever she started saying something the guy would snap at her and continue.
The conversation lasted a good around... half an hour maybe.
I personally think that he was being waaay to aggressive. I have never told someone off like this before, but I have been on the receiving end of this and it just feels really really bad and it's frustrating that the person won't even let you explain yourself.
Do any of you do this, and if so, don't you realize how uncomfortable you're making the person feel or do you just not care? And if you're usually on the receiving end of this, what do you feel and what do you do about it?
1 response
@jes2ie (50)
• Singapore
19 Feb 10
Hi Rhazelle,
It depends on the personality of the person (blasting away/being blasted at) and the gravity of the issue on hand.
Telling people off - ha, I'm by nature mild and non-confrontational so I don't really do this. I will give the person a chance to explain but if what happened was really really a terrible mistake, I will let off steam for just a few seconds before hearing them out =)
Being told off - Sure, it happens. Be it my fault or not, I'll just keep quiet and let the person vent for a while first. Unless I really feel that the accusations are seriously unjust, I'll do my utmost to interrupt the tirade to defend myself.
@Rhazelle (356)
• Canada
20 Feb 10
Those are good approaches. But I guess when you're the one being told off and if they're, like you, mild and non-confrontal, then I feel that it's hard to stand up for yourself even if you're actually in the right and actually make the other person LISTEN.
Ah, so frustrating .
@jes2ie (50)
• Singapore
20 Feb 10
Hi Rhazelle,
Thanks for the vote =)
You may be right. For those with my personality, they could be on the losing end. But then again, no matter how mild they are, everyone would have a limit to their tolerance =) So for me, unless the other party is extremely unfair, I'll let them vent first. Hopefully, with that, they would have gotten things off their chest and might be in a position to listen.
So when someone is blasting away at you, try to keep your cool as much as possible. We wouldn't want to go down to their level of uncontrollable rage, would we? ...heee =)
