Is it a ttradition for children to leave their parent's home after growing up?
By udayrao2
@udayrao2 (781)
India
March 23, 2010 9:02am CST
Us this so in your country or culture? Here in India, by tradition they do not leave, except the daughter leaves to join her husband's family after her marriage; and the sons stay together even after marriage, but nowadays with space constraints etc this is very rarely followed and they move out or buy a bigger house and stay together.
But I believe elsewhere it may not be the same - my cousins live in UK and Germany & when our family went to visit them at their places last year( we were also invited to stay with them which we did) and though my cousins had very big houses with enough extra bedrooms for their childrens' families & their future grand- children - their children ( and my nieces/nephews)left the house the moment they finished education and got jobs, even before getting married, and they shifted to small studios just down the road. When I asked why they did not stay there with their parents, i was told that they shifted as they felt odd as their fiends teased them for staying with parents even after maturing. I was really surprised at such thinking.
What do you feel about this.
What do you feel about this.3 people like this
9 responses
@Biomechanoid (2923)
• Estonia
23 Mar 10
Well in our country young people don't leave their parents after becoming 18 too often, it happens a little bit later. Most of them decide to continue their studies in university or college, so they just don't have enough funds to buy themselves their own home. However, there are also lots of students who rent an apartment and move there. I think that young people want to leave their home because they don't want to burden their parents, they want to earn money for themselves and not to live for parents' funds.
@udayrao2 (781)
• India
25 Mar 10
I did not mean that living with parents means that the parents fund the children - living together does not mean depending on parents.I know many cases where the parents & children( esp sons)along with their families live together but then the expenses are shared or individually borne- so in this case each maintains his self-respect.
@Porcospino (31366)
• Denmark
23 Mar 10
In Denmark some young people leave their parents' home when they are 18 and some young people choose to live with their parents a bit longer for instanse if they are studying and don't have much money. In my country it is quite unusual to live with your parents if you are in your late twenties or older. There are no difference between the girls and the boys and both groups usually leave their parents' house when they are in the their early twenties or before that time. In my culture it is important to be independent, and young people who stay with their parents when they are in late twenties or older are sometimes considered "immature", because they aren't independant yet.
@udayrao2 (781)
• India
24 Mar 10
Thanks your response. But I said that because my nephews/nieces, though they follow all our traditional Indian customs while staying overseas, stay separately just to 'please' or have a 'good opinion' & not laughed at or teased by the others among their social circuit - which I do find a bit funny- why should one change just to please some one else and behave with a double standard.
It may be different in different cultures & countries, but I would not say "immature" because they stay together not to be dependent but the family bonding remains strong; even if they stay together they all either contribute according to their share to the house expenses, and lead their own lives & decide their own actions, so living with parents does not mean not "dependent" - the roles may be similar to the ones who stay separately only they live together.
And moreover in many Asian culture the joint -family system was there previously and still, exists so that is a carry-over from the old days.
1 person likes this
@Porcospino (31366)
• Denmark
24 Mar 10
I wouldn't call it immature either, but my culture tends to see it that way. In the past the grandparents, the parents and the children often lived together, but it is not common anymore, and it has become a part of the tradition that young people move out of their parents' home when they are 18 or a bit older. In my country young people also get laughed at or teased if they keep on living with their parents, and I find that a little unfair, because I don't think young people are immature or dependant just because they are still living with their parents.
@cupkitties (7421)
• United States
24 Mar 10
Well here in the US of A parents start pushing their kids at a certain age so they can go on to college and get their own place so they can stop paying for you. Thats my experience at least
@Ritchelle (3790)
• Philippines
24 Mar 10
am not really sure if this "cultural" thing should still be accepted now that everybody knows how some and practically most societies of the world look at this. besides it sure is a sign of independence and resourcefulness of any individual not only to move out from the family home once he reaches legal age but it bodes well (mostly) for any marriage if the couple are etching life on their own. am from the philippines and this staying with one's parents is still widely practiced. however, i was raised in a family wherein we're told that the moment we marry we have to step out of the house. it's not easy, though. however, i find myself growing up faster than my batch mates who are staying with their parents. now i know when my parents used to say that they're proud they stood on their own.
@alwayzzcitra (1861)
• Indonesia
24 Mar 10
I live in Indonesia, and nope, it's not the tradition here. Kids move out of the house when they got married. Even some of them still stay with their parents/in laws because of financial reason like doesn't have enough savings to buy a house, etc. Another possible reason is the couples are having a baby, so the wives may need people to help her with the baby when babysitter isn't an option. I moved out of my parents' house when I was 18 because I had to go to college in another province. Now I am married and live even further. So it doesn't apply to me lol 
@jianruwang (1)
• China
24 Mar 10
Well in my Country, children are supposed to be with their parents until they get married. Years ago, boys would live together with parents even after they married. Now, in order to get rid of the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, they move out. But, parents still have to buy their sons houses. For girls, what they need is just a marriage portion.
@MagicalBubbles (5103)
• Canada
23 Mar 10
Not here, they stay at home well into their 30's now. Cant get rid of them even if you wanted to. A friend of mine moved to a smaller house and still the kids are there, He thought they'd live in the city but they followed in the country lol.
@phoenix8606 (4942)
•
23 Mar 10
hell0!
well, here in my country it is definitely not a tradition and the tradition is actually the opposite- after they have 18 to stay by their parents, or at least the boys, because with the girls it is different- when a girl get married she leave her home and goes to leave with her husband to his family or they buy a new own house. only if the boy doesn't have a house and his family lives for rent they go to the girl's family, but i guess it is the same in your country!
and for the boys is different- they stay by their parents and the wife comes there! because the tradition says that the new family should live by the parents of the husband!
@kainalu55 (364)
• United States
24 Mar 10
Well, although i would not say it is a "tradition" to stay in your parents home after growing up, here in Hawaii it is not uncommon. I am 27, and not afraid to admit i am currently living iin my parents home with my husband and daughter. My sister, who is 23 is living here as well with her boyfriend. I moved out at 19, only to return years later at the age of 25. I do not plan on living here forever however. I am currently livinh here with my family as a way to save money while we are woeking on renovating the home we will be moving into soon. With the way the economy currently is, i believe it is great if Children are allowed to live with there parents longer, as long as they are helping out and not taking advantage of the situation.
