Was Inlove...Got Heartbroken....Now stronger....

unconditional mother-daughter love - my source of strength..my princess angel
Philippines
March 27, 2010 2:39am CST
I was working abroad,good salary,recently got promoted, a promising career when i feel in love with the man whom i thought is the right guy,a good,kind & romantic guy,all that you could ask for a man,he is almost perfect.We dreamed about our life together & then i got pregnant,it was a difficult pregnancy for me to the point that he told me to get rid of it but i insist i can handle it.We both decided i will go home and he will follow afterwards,he calls me regularly until i delivered my princess.Calls becomes less and less,my baby got christened,celebrated her 1st birthday,2 christmas passed,new years..all we got is promises,he will call a week prior to any celebrations,telling he will send something for her,well the crows might get white but we receive nothing.Finally calls stopped...i still did try to communicate telling him,i don't need financial support,it's not about me but for my baby,the least he could do is try to call to ask how is she,but nothing...my friends who knows him told me,there is no other person involve,and then i received an email from him telling me he is sorry & told me he is not ready for the responsibility as he wants to enjoy his life still & told me not to worry as once he is ready,he will come back to us but i am not shaken coz i have my own source of strength now,my little princess..anyways,i told him to just enjoy his life as me & my baby are happy just the 2 of us.Any advise? Am i making the right decision here or is it worth giving him a chance when he is ready,God know when he will be...
11 responses
• India
27 Mar 10
Shenlynn, you are a brave girl. You have taken a wise decision. Don't let your BF be off the tenterhooks so easily. If he wanted to enjoy life, then why must he do it at your cost. Tell him it’s not you but his daughter needs him. He ought to be responsible towards her if not towards you. Tell him though you do not hate him for what he did to you, but surely, his daughter would, once she grows up. Remain in touch with him and keep pitching all this to his face, until he feels ashamed of himself.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
27 Mar 10
Thank you achilles..I have infact did my very best to tell him..this is not about me or us anymore...but about his daughter....i have never told him i hate him,infact thank him for giving me a wonderful daughter who adores me....& i did my very best to continue keeping in touch with him but it is he,who distance himself to us..anyways..i'm always praying to God to continue to shower me with strength
@jinjer168 (1599)
• Philippines
27 Mar 10
Hello! you know what? i salute you for being in love, for being a mother and now for being a father to your little angel. I'ts a good decision to keep your child and believe me, you will never ever regret it for the rest of your life. I'ts God's gift that you will be thank for forever. As for your BF, don't worry too much about him, just go with the flow... you're the only one who understands your own feeling so just pray a lot, enjoy each and everyday that passes your life and ask God to bless all your decisions. For this i am sure that you will never go wrong.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
27 Mar 10
hello jinjer..thank you....i am always praying to Him for guidance...& yes i am enjoying my life with my angel.
@engrdng06 (248)
• Japan
28 Mar 10
I was so touched! I wish I am as stronger than you. How could you handle things like that? Well Im also on a relationship which I believe is almost the same. The only difference is that you are much stronger than I. Well, youve made the right thing girl and Im happy that you have found your strength with your princess.
1 person likes this
@setsuna26 (2410)
• Philippines
27 Mar 10
We all make mistakes every now and then. I think what really matters is how we pick ourselves up and move on. I know that will take sometime for your part but you should somehow start real fast . Just think about those people who care for you .Just because it didnt work out for you and your boyfriend doesnt mean your world is ending. Im glad that you recognize the fact that your stronger now! thats my friend! Im sure there are tons of guys waiting for you out there! you just need to look for them ;)
1 person likes this
@Gany15k (1674)
• India
27 Mar 10
I want ask a question then for what he had a relationship with you if he is not ready.Just to enjoy life with girl ?..I don't know about your society.In my country if anything happened like that then they will spoil the girl's life and the baby too. You have a got a princess.I'm really happy about that.It is difficult to grow a baby without a male guidance...Why you just made him to do as he wish......Don't mistake me...I'm really in angry over him... Loving a girl , giving a baby and then not ready to live..what the hell logic is this...?
• Philippines
28 Mar 10
hello gany...the fact that i did made him do his wish is that,,,i have tried my very best to fight for my daughters right....but no matter what i did..nothing....so instead of stressing myself,and made myself sick...i rather be strong & take care of my daughter...
@Gany15k (1674)
• India
28 Mar 10
Hmmmm..! then live your best in rest of your life and take care of your daughter...All the best..I just don't know who will punish these guys....God won't do...He just let these guys live..
@andy77e (5165)
• United States
3 Apr 10
Do not sleep with him, or anyone again until you are married. That is why this happened. Do not let him use you like a toy, until he is married to you. Do not let him in your life. Do not let him stay at your house, or you at his house. Do it right. Marry first. Or else you may end up alone with two children. Single mother is hard. Sorry that happened. Do it right from here on. I would not wait for him. He is not mature enough to handle what he has done. If he comes around, and shows you he is willing to marry and take care of his family like he should, then go from there. But otherwise, if someone else come, let him go.
• United Arab Emirates
28 Mar 10
You could take the risk but for me i'll let him be
@krisnel (498)
• Philippines
28 Mar 10
just let the time decide what would be happen to both of you. now you should be concentrate to your baby. cherish your baby with care and love. that was the most important thing to do. i admire you for being a stronger person. if i was on your situation i dont know what to do with my life. but i hope that the two of you could back to each other arms and he will stay with you as soon as possible.
• Philippines
28 Mar 10
You made the right decision. Do not force anybody to go live with you even with a baby or not. Be strong for your baby. If God has plans for you to meet the right man or if your former lover is still the right man for you, God will make plans that will make your path crossed with him. If not, be happy for your baby and guide her well so that she will not make the same mistake. Make her stronger as well by teaching and raising her well. Congratulations for doing well!
• Philippines
27 Mar 10
Its perfectly normal to me and I see nothing wrong with what he done. Even I someday may become like him. I have my own limitations and these can hurt my wife and child so I go away. But I will promise to be her only man. Im impressed by my fellow males. They serve their wife on household chores but never speak to their wife and now he goes away from you but still maintain contact. I wonder how it would be with me.
@raynejasper (2326)
• Philippines
27 Mar 10
..hi.. its good you were able to manage your situation.. and I'd say that your decision of just letting him free and do as he wishes right now and enjoy life is good and probably right.. because there's no use of forcing him to take his responsibility if he's not really prepared.. just give him space and keep in touch with him updating him of how well you're doing.. by doing that, he can be persuaded indirectly to decide and face his responsibility.. what happened to you isn't a thing to be regretted with.. you already have an angel and I suppose that's more than enough.. I am already married.. I'd say both of us were not ready when we got married but we have to do it because we are having a baby(that was wrong).. what happened later is that, I tried my best to get matured in thinking because I already have a responsibility.. the hard thing was, my husband cannot do the same.. until now, I'm struggling of how to persuade him to get matured.. I've realized that we cannot force anybody to take a responsibility that they are not ready to face yet.. although I didn't force my husband to marry me.. we decided it.. right now, I want to tell my husband to just get out of the house and do whatever he wants until he realizes his responsibility.. but the thing is, we are already married.. so I say that your decision was probably right.. and when your boyfriend decides to take his responsibility and come home to you, that's very good but if he finds somebody else to spend his life with, then it won't be that hard anymore because you already surpassed the time when you needed him the most.. still, introduce him to your child because your child deserve to know her father..