Is it wrong to be too honest?

United States
May 8, 2010 3:29am CST
If a friend ask you for advice about their life or such in general and she said she will do just as you say then later on sees her doing the total opposite again. She then ask you for advice for the same problem again and again and again. You feel annoyed and tired of hearing it, is it rude to tell her off? I mean, it sounds mean to tell her off but she was asking for it, right? You are just being honest.
15 responses
@basqui (3890)
• Philippines
8 May 10
Well, sometimes truth hurts but some people take it positively. Some people are jst not open-minded that even if you're saying it in a good manner then they still consider it as a negative comment. Maybe you should not bother commenting at all if your friend is not open-minded, you would just get a bad impression from her
• United States
9 May 10
I think that's the bad thing about me as a friend, I won't sugar coat things for you. If you will hate me later on because I gave you my honest opinion then that's your bad not mines you know. It's like you asked me so I answered and if you don't like it then it's up to you know on how you want to see it. haha
• Pakistan
9 May 10
i think be honest and tell the truth in start donn afraid what will happen next if you were sure about you say then dnn worry about the result. because truth can't be hidden.
• Philippines
8 May 10
If you want to tell the brutal truth to someone and he/she really wants to know the truth, don't forget to remind that person to be ready for the truth. warn him/her about what you're going to say. at least after that person cries or get angry after hearing the truth, you can always say "i warned you" :D
• United States
8 May 10
funny thing, its like you can read my mind, i had to remind her 2 times not to get angry because I am just gonna say my honest opinion and she said I wont, and BAM she cried a river saying how horrible my feelings were AHAH
• Argentina
8 May 10
You are evil!!.. lol... nah, the brutal thrut always help a person to change in certain ways to be. So don't feel bad, is for her own good.
• United States
8 May 10
No way, you think Im evil? OMG thank you HAHA jk. yeah it really does help, right? I mean if you sugar coat things the more they will bug you in the future, might as well get it over it :D
@tomitomi (5441)
• Singapore
8 May 10
No! it's not wrong to be honest unless you think otherwise. But I agree it's difficult to keep up. Nevertheless it's not impossible. Sometimes people hear without actually listening. And that's why you hear the same problem again and again for advice. The problem is there obviously but the bigger problem is the person asking for the advice on the problem. Tackle not the problem first but the person, otherwise you would be bombarded with the same voice asking for advice on the same problem over and over again. Being honest makes it easy for you to start off with, that is.
• United States
8 May 10
You have good points tomitomi, I will keep those in mind :D
@tomitomi (5441)
• Singapore
8 May 10
Thanks for the topic!
@rachael5760 (2675)
• Israel
9 May 10
I don't think it is wrong to be honest. I call them like I see them. Honesty is the best policy even though you think something might bad might happen if you tell the truth. I trust people that tell the truth rather than people who tell me what they think I want to hear. I wouldn't get angry at the other person for asking you for advice and then doing the opposite, it is the other persons prerogative to do what they feel is right. Maybe your advice didn't work for the other person.
• Philippines
9 May 10
It would come to a point when you feel that you've exerted all your efforts and yet it all went to waste. Once saturated, I'm sure, without any hint, you would naturally ask her to back off and try checking her listening & comprehension skills. Boy, it sounds like being brutally honest.
@evepin (723)
• Philippines
9 May 10
i think there's nothing wrong with being honest. some people however deliver what they are trying to say in an unpleasant way, such as being rude or being tactless. maybe what you need to do is to discuss your concern with your friend in a calm way. try to be a little cautious so as not to hurt her feelings - be firm and assertive without being aggressive.
• United States
8 May 10
I can totally relate. When i hear people nagging over and over about the same ole stuff, i'll ask them--Are you looking for feedback, because you may not want to hear what i have to say, seriously? OR Are you just venting to yourself? Call it rude, because it is, but rather they say looking for feedback or just venting, ignore them. Otherwise, it'll be an unnecessary argument over something you'll wind up tell'in them that you could care less, because it's really non of your buisness anyways.
@saphrina (31740)
• South Africa
8 May 10
Sweetie, let me put it this way, if my friend ignore my honest opinion and advice, she can fly to the moon for all i care. I am not going to sit back and watch her making the same mistake over and over again. Some people really never learn. TATA.
@myzire72 (1157)
• Singapore
8 May 10
Since your friend does not react to kind words, it's time for you to really wake her up. Anyway, by telling her the truth, you are doing her a big service, or else she won't be able to see her problems.
• India
8 May 10
well its not wrong but then it is smart of you not be be too honest.because if you are too honest then chances are that you will find yourself in lots of trouble.being honest is good as far as it doesn't effect yourself or the other person in a negative manner.
@1anurag1 (3580)
• India
8 May 10
This is never wrong to be honest. but some time there is a need of caring other feelings also. some time you have seen that doctor does not tell the disease direct to the patient as it could be a hazard for him or her. so there is a need of understanding.
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
8 May 10
I don't believe you can be too honest. You are either honest or untruthhful. The only time honesty can be wrong is when you use it to hurt somepne intentionally. Honesty is still the best policy.
• India
8 May 10
yes it should be .That is a human nature of a good friend. I think your friend is always confused, she should needed a first a believe on you and work is keep faith on her and help her.
@Brook909 (111)
8 May 10
No,it's not wrong to be honest.but when one of your freind asks for the advice for a same question again and again after you've given her advice,you may tell her that your advice maybe is not useful for her,this is a euphemistic way to refuse to provide any advice for the same question better than to tell her off derectly.Hope you not be annoyed.
@Grat15 (416)
• Singapore
8 May 10
Somed people not realized what and how they act when interaction with other. If you care with your friend, then you have to let him/her knows. I believe you knows the best way, so you wouldn't hurt their heart. Have a nice weekend.