how is the best way to get your lover
June 18, 2010 6:16am CST
you're in love or just have a crush on somebody. Which are the tips and tricks to get someone deep in love with you and only you? like sweet talkers, given gifts or attention what would you do?
• United States
19 Jun 10
I think tricking or coercing someone into falling in love with you is the worst possible thing you could do. A person can be manipulated into having a physical attraction fairly easily. But that is not real love. Its a mild form of infatuation. You might even make them think they are in love with you, but so many couples break up after one of them wakes up one morning thinking "how did I get here? How did this happen? I never wanted this". Love is a choice of the will. It's a choice someone makes in the deep part of their soul. It can't be tricked. It can't be faked. It can't be physically motivated. You may entice them for a while, but if they do not love you in their soul, they'll find that out and move on, hurting both of you in the process. Instead, I would suggest you just be friends. Be friends for as long as possible. Don't try and make any relationship into more than it is. Let it unfold on its own. The most happy couples I meet are the ones that found love when they were not looking for it. One girl I know from Sweden told me her story. For the first 10 years, she look desperately for love, and got in one bad relationship after another. Finely, hurt and angry, she decided she didn't need men anymore. She advanced her career, and did things she liked, such as horse back riding. There were a few others that liked horse back riding too. One of them was a guy in the same group. After they had been going for many months, he asked her if she'd like to get something to eat after they finished up. A year later, they were engaged, and now they have 4 children, and a loving family, and she can't imagine how she end up so happy and loved. Well its partly because she stopped trying to force love, and this time let it grow on it's own. She didn't smother him with kisses at first sight. She didn't try and wear sensual clothing, or show her curves, or use seductive words, in fact she wasn't looking for a husband at all. In my opinion, that's what allowed her to grow a friendship, that became romantic. That would be my suggestion. No tricks. No enticement. No trying to 'get the other person to love you'. Just be a friend, and see what comes.
• Netherlands Antilles
19 Jun 10
How desperate you are how easier to get hurt? Just because your chasing love then if I just sit somewhere from no where a cupid will arrive to hit me with the love arrow. that means chasing love can be your biggest mistakes acording some peoples opinion ?
18 Jun 10
that's the million dollar question that almost everyone is asking as for me, everyone is different and responds to different approaches. i haven't found a 'one all solution' for attracting people yet...but i do know that people are more likely to respond towards other people who are able to talk on the same wavelength as they are..and once the lines of communication has been opened, it's up to the one courting and the one being courted on how to proceed