When your friends don't understand you, what should you do?

China
July 3, 2010 7:11am CST
Always have some time when you say something,but even your best friend dont understand.She may argue with you how wrong you are.They cant agree with your idea.Actually,there is no absolute right or wrong.When you are in this kind of situation ,what will u do? If you have a debate with your friend on that, probably, you will get both of you into trouble.If you dont, she will consider you agree with her standpoint.What will u do? If you have a judgemental friend ,he or she often stops you from making your dream come true by giving unsuitable advice.will you regard him as your friend? Tell me how u feel about it....
1 person likes this
11 responses
@tomitomi (5441)
• Singapore
3 Jul 10
There's nothing much I can do but just being myself. I don't think I could ever change just to please anyone. For a judgemental friend my advice is to stop being judgemental. He has to change if he needs to see the world around him changes.
@tomitomi (5441)
• Singapore
3 Jul 10
By change I mean a positive change. It's a calculated move you've thought about and desire to see it work.
@besthope44 (12145)
• India
16 Jul 10
Well tolerance and patience can help the relation to grow better and smooth.
• Ethiopia
4 Jul 10
Yes there is this kind of situations between friends i also been in this kind of situations many times,what i do is,i don't push towards the dis agreement side instead i will try to change a topic,or tell my friends that it is not for being negative or will tell them not to take personally, cause most of the time this kind of situatins happen it is because my friends take things personally. cheers
@smartjack (521)
• India
4 Jul 10
i will never regard any such person as my friend. My friends never force their opinion on my. They advice me but they never force me to follow it. They believe that i am matured enough to take my own decisions. They help me whenever i need them. And we share a good relationship. We understand each other very well. We also respect each others feelings and thoughts well. We value each other. And we also support each other and never criticize.
4 Jul 10
I guess they lack the capacity to empathise with you and see things from your point of view. Personally, if I were in your situation I'd try talking to them and say that, whilst I understand where they're coming from, if they're really a good friend they'd try and understand me too. I would bring it up in a calm manner and not go about it in an accusing way but just let them know. They may not even be aware they're making you feel that way!
• India
4 Jul 10
Dear, there may be some reasons that your friend doesn't understand your wish or opinion. it may be due to she is not agreed with what you have suggested, if such case then better you ask her to explain the logic behind her thoughts. after her explaination you analyse yourself what's fair. In second case there may an over confidence by both about their opinion, both are thinking that they only have the right decision, why otherone is not accepting the truth. Third case should be either you could not manage to explain your view or she couldnot, so better again sit and discuss the issue from the begining. definately a proper understanding will always help to reach on a fair mutual decision.
• India
4 Jul 10
Its natural that we cannot always understand everyone , even our own friends. Just give them the time they need to think of you. Hope they understand very soon. Just make sure this doesn't make a gap in between friends. We need to learn to get along despite these things. We are friends right ?! Cheers :-)
@ydb777 (36)
• United States
3 Jul 10
I think a healthy debate between friends is healthy. I mean we are all different so we see things from different perspectives. Now if you can't have a disagreement without there being some hard feelings something is wrong with that picture.
• Ethiopia
3 Jul 10
Yes there is such kind of situation between friends,i also was in this kind of situation with my friends,what i do is i didn't push to that mood too much i prefer to change a topic in a very smooth way,i try to tell a friend that we don't have to take it so serious
@sk66rc (4261)
• United States
3 Jul 10
Actually, I don't need a friend or anyone else for that matter to understand me. I don't have opinions & beliefs to be liked by people, I have opinions & beliefs to live my life by. If they don't like it then they should stay out of my life. People have disagreements on just about everything. People I consider my friends understand this point about me. If I ask their opinion on something, they'll state their opinion but never argue or try to push their belief on me. After all, it's my decision to either take their advise or not.
• India
3 Jul 10
Well arguments may come in between friends. It's completely natural and the more we actually argue the more we realise that we are getting more closer to that person. That's what i believe. I would try and make reason with my friend and explain to him/her in the best way possible. However if she is stubborn i would just switch the topic or maybe leave her alone for a couple of minutes so that they may get some time to think. I know that besides how many arguments take place we would still be friends.