Why do we Lose Friends?
By vmenard
@vmenard (895)
United States
July 5, 2010 2:59pm CST
I have a friend, who I was very close to. Now, we're not close at all. It's sad how people allow time, life, to diminish their relationships. At one time we'd talk everyday either at work, on phone. We'd see each other out of work at least once a week. Now we talk maybe once a month and see each other even less. I'm not sure how it happened. Now when we do see each other, it's like we don't know each other at all. It's pretty sad.
1 person likes this
16 responses
@annamol (275)
• United States
6 Jul 10
We loose friends mostly bacause we loose contact with them or simply grow older and change our interests. We are not the same people anymore and they are not the same either. We don't have anything in common. That's why. It is sad but it's true and it's life.
@yiyun_h (183)
• United States
5 Jul 10
i guess, as we grow older, our own ideas are getting stronger and it makes us hard to tolerant others difference. this might not be your won case but either one side of friendship is like this, the friendship would end.
i had some usual experience with my health problem and it made my life very difficult these years. what i found during these years was many friends started to judge my situation and if they found it difficult to understand, they would estrange themselves away from me. it is sad but also i learned the lesson. i know who are my true friends now. :-)
1 person likes this
@pursky (12)
• China
6 Jul 10
Partly agree with you. As to this question, I am willing to think about it in a positive attitude.
Friends are necessary to everyone and everyone wants a whole-life friend. But the life of everyone is different. For example, a beautiful girl Ann, in her childhood, she might need a beautiful friends because they belong to a country while in the teenage period, she might need a friend who is good at listening respectfully because so many boys love her and persue her, she needs to share these things with her close friend. Obviously, Ann will lose friends and also make new friends.
Just as what we live through can't be the same as another, we might have different friens in different periods. Some old friends might be forgotten even hated, however, some other will be estranged and the others are still the friends, even can be forever friends.
The important thing is not hating or regretting, but cherishing what we own and making new friends in the new phase.
@hanagi (390)
• Philippines
6 Jul 10
I have the same experience. Every now and then I would be close to a friend to the point that we are always together. But When she went outside the country we no longer talk nor chat. I don't want to lose them but the fire of our friendship had been fired out.
1 person likes this
@aurorastorm (1131)
• United States
5 Jul 10
I have had this happen with friends that were such good friends of ours, use to go on vacations together, been there when each other's children were born, our kids got along really well. Then the couple began having marital problems and they totally dropped all of their married friends, always saying they are busy. Well I tried really hard to be there for them and to be their friends since I knew they were having problems, they are doing better now, but our friendship has not fared so well. I have a lot of really good friends, and know that good friends are with you through thick and thin. Case in point, my very best friend and I have been best friends since we were 8 and most of that time we did not live in the same state as adults. So like some of the others on this discussion, I have decided they were not as good as friends as I thought they were.
@LeoWyatt (169)
• Bulgaria
5 Jul 10
Well I don't think you will believe me but you probably weren't real friends, because real friends are rare but they are forever and a little fight or something like that can't tear them apart. We make friends and lose friends every day but think about it. Don't you have a friend or friends who have always been there for you and you can call them friends all the time and friends that you are sure that will stay with you in good and bad times. This friends are real and we don't lose them.
1 person likes this
@megaboy (25)
•
5 Jul 10
I think like you because in my opinion real friends are real when they stay behind you back an always agree with you. think that we can saw the true friend when he supports you in a very difficult and bad situation for you. I think that real friends won't split apart after a little fight as you said. I completely agree with you.
1 person likes this
@neleene (55)
• Philippines
6 Jul 10
hmmmm vmenard...i and my other 3 childhood friends are now away from each other, literally but not by heart..we don't communicate through mobile phone nor seeing each other frequently; for every two months we are already happy to see each other and good thing is we even shared a lot of new things in life than before...enjoying reminiscing the past and make laugh about it... =)
it's a matter of giving your friend a time to explore their world yet reserve room in your heart for them in case they want to have rest and spend quality time with you after a long journey in life...
Friendship will not die if we try to understand and let them go...later they will miss their friend -you..
@edwardjoy2000 (2387)
• United Arab Emirates
6 Jul 10
the main reason we break up with friends is dur to the commiunication gap...we are goo friends,but some years down the line we have no time for each other to talk...and after some time our ego's clas...we think that our friend has not contacted us for a long time and he also thinks the same and thus the communication gap increases and by the time we realise this we have already lost our friend.
@katie0 (5203)
• Japan
6 Jul 10
I'm sorry for that.
I think those who go away wasn't actually friends. I thought they all would go but then I find this girlfriend that we kind of fight a lot, still strong.
She was the real one.
The good thing is that I'm really not interested in those who aren't real friends, if they want to go feel free.
@LovelyHelena (2)
• United States
6 Jul 10
We loose friends when our interests change is how I view it.
@jose431 (164)
• India
26 Jul 10
During my college days I have got many friends who is very closed to me.We share our true feeling and always creates a joke to each other.So once we go separately for long time and meet again we don't to each other in this way we lose our friends.on other hand we usually lose our friends by miss understanding between each other and lose our lose friend.
@frontvisions101 (16043)
• Philippines
5 Jul 10
There's this thing called phasing out where you just pull yourself out of friendship intentionally or unintentionally. Maybe the both of you did that unconsciously cuz you had better things to do.
@titaniumpen (676)
• Hong Kong
6 Jul 10
I'm sorry to hear this, it's sad to lose a friend, especially one you were very close with. Some friends leave because they have some expectations in you at first (some benefits). And when they find you offer none, they leave you, because you're not useful to him anymore. Sometimes he may find your character too different from his and find you hard to communicate with. But friends sometimes break apart for no reason at all. 
I hope you can meet a real friend some day. 
I hope you can meet a real friend some day. 