Any suggestions for mother of a twelve year old that flat out ignores me?

United States
August 28, 2010 9:19pm CST
What do you do when your child seems to "not hear" what you have asked them to do? I don't believe in spanking, and I hate yelling. But I hate being ignored even more! All the time I hear "I didn't know I was supposed to do that." But she'll say "ok" when I tell her things need to be done. Most of the time I end up doing it myself, but I don't feel that's really doing much to teach her anything. Can you help?
1 response
• United States
29 Aug 10
Children these days seem to have a mind of their own. I would strongly suggest fun privileges get taken away. When you ask for something to be done and if it is not done I would not do it myself but leave it for her and take away something she treasure until she begins to be more attentive. Things like internet, gaming, cellphones and hanging out with friends. But when you say you cannot do this today it cannot be a maybe I will think about it as no has to mean no. She is only 12 so imagine this behavior at let say 15, oh no then it will be much worse. Believe you me when she knows you are serious and loses some fun things she will then start listening as she will treasure her fun. Good Luck
1 person likes this
@Trace86 (5043)
• United States
29 Aug 10
I think this is perfect advice. Perhaps you could try "not hearing" her a bit too.
• United States
29 Aug 10
I agree. I have to stop being so wishy-washy with my requests. Doing things for her when she doesn't do them is just like me saying, "It's ok... if you don't feel like doing it, it will get done anyway." I hate the thought of being a nagging tyrant, but I also hate the thought of her not growing up with a sense of responsibility. And I certainly dislike having to do all the chores myself! Thank you for your responses!
• United States
29 Aug 10
It certainly is not an easy job. Good luck with this and please take the be consistent part seriously as children today although raised ever so properly do have a tendency to have their own minds and I am afraid this will hurt in the end. Take care