Long Distance Relationship
By yuki1987
@yuki1987 (59)
Philippines
September 21, 2010 7:03pm CST
My boyfriend & I has been steady for almost 10 years now.When he got the chance to work abroad, he easily grabbed the once in a million chance to earn more than what he's earning here in our country. we have been keeping our relationship despite of the million miles that separates us. One thing is, I find it really hard to have a relationship like ours. Especially when you don't have complete trust with your partner. we always argue with small things over the phone especially when I go out with friends, he always gets mad at me.I came to the point that I felt like giving up. How can I go on with a relationship that I don't know if there's still me and him in the end? How can I go on if he doesn't trust me and me to him? But how an I let go the love that we shared for 10 years almost?
8 responses
@carenjoy (8)
•
22 Sep 10
it doean't matter how long you stayed for a relationship. if you're both really for each other, it will always be. trust is one of a relationship's foundation. well, if he's having a hard time trusting you, then he's questioning your love for him..long distance relationship is really hard though.. i've been through it.. if you really love him that much why don't you follow him? that's how relationships go..someone will always have to adjust for the other..
@carenjoy (8)
•
23 Sep 10
if you think he's worth everything then take the risk..but if you feel that he's taking too much of you then leave..it doean't really matter how long you've been together..what matters is how much both of you can give and take for each other..it's not fair if you're risking everything just for him and he's not.
@jennyze (7029)
• Indonesia
22 Sep 10
Wow, tough Yuki. I was never good with any long distance relationship, like you both of us have not enough trust for each other.
Well, I thought with 10 years relationship before he went abroad, you must have known all of him and his habits. You can talk with him and told him your thoughts. Discuss how the best way to avoid the doubts. I really hope yours will work out fine.
@yuki1987 (59)
• Philippines
23 Sep 10
10 years isn't enough unless you are already married..i have known some people lasted for 10 years and more but still, what happened to them now?they're separated..even married people don't know the real partner they have..if they know there partners then we don't have separated married couple right now..that's what my point is..for now that's what i'm worrying of..thanks for the comment..good day..mwah..
@JOIEMARVIC (2335)
• Philippines
22 Sep 10
Ten years is a very good foundation in a relationship. try to tresure that and do not put it into waste. The both of you are just starting to adjust to this new set-up. Time will come and things will be back to normal between the two of you. Do not worry to much. You love each other. That's all that matters.
@yuki1987 (59)
• Philippines
23 Sep 10
hello..yeah..ten years of being together isn't a joke..that's why it is really hard for me to let go even if i'm about to give up..he has been my company and friend for that long years we've been together...i'm now just sticking to the fact that we both love each other..sigh..still hoping for more years of being in love..thanks so much..
@ashishp2c (286)
• India
22 Sep 10
i think trust is the most important fuel that needs to keep a long distance relationship running. If trust is missing from a relationship, it is tuff to survive. Try to gain trust in your relationship so that you dont loose your relationship....
@vrosado845 (82)
• United States
22 Sep 10
I was kind of in the same situation as you not so long ago. My boyfriend and i were together for 2 years before he decided to go into the military. When he left it became harder and harder to keep in touch and to keep the trust between us. He was always busy with his work and i was always busy with work and school. We decided to end it on good terms. We still talk and consider ourselves the best of friends. Even if it doesnt work out between you two, you can still have a friendship. The love between you two has gone on for too long to just let it go. But still, keep trying, put effort into it. I believe any relationship can work out if both people are willing to work at it. So good luck. I wish you the best :-)
@tupeiwei (42)
• China
22 Sep 10
if he is a good guy and you are sure he will give you a happy life, i suggest that the million miles isn't the questuon.
i am facing the same question:the hometown of my boyfried and i are different, and my parents want me to go back home and work,while he will stay in his place. so i don't know what should i do.
@yuki1987 (59)
• Philippines
23 Sep 10
it is difficult to choose between the wants of your family and your love with your boyfriend right?that's what i'm exactly experiencing right now..i wanted to be with him over where he is but i have a family who needs me still..and this is where we both live..he will go back here if time permits but i don't know when is that..sad..
@piya84 (2581)
• India
25 Sep 10
I have never bee there yuki.But i can guess your situation and tell you about it.If i was you i would find out way to stay close to him or move on.
Btw how long he is there?If it is a matter of 1 or 2 years then wait for him.If he is not sure when he will be returning back to your country then its difficult.
@make_it_real (76)
•
22 Sep 10
Maybe i could share something to this topic. I have been also to long distance relationship before and never thought it would be that hard for me. I met a guy from net and been good for, i thought enough period of time to get to know each other. We've been sharing thoughts and was been so happy while spending time with him. And time had passed since we met in person. At first i thought we could face the situation to live together but wasn't thinking how long it will last as long as we feel good being together..till one day he had to go abroad for work again and left me with his promise that our communications and our commitment would still be there. But then..after a few months..without noticing we have been getting cold to each other and he started to spend less time with me,i was afraid this could be ending soon. For me, that very moment still wanted to let him know that i will be waiting for him till he gets back..but things went so cruel for me for he was being so cold or thinking that i might get lost in an instances and he was so afraid that i wouldn't be that faithful to him..was just been really frustrated with the thoughts he was thinking that way about me..so this is somehow the instances u might encounter being with someone miles away apart from you.
But still why don't you try..if you feel both u can survive..then be it!!!
