my boyfriend mother dumped me (wow)

@tlaquan (177)
United States
October 13, 2010 5:58pm CST
me and my boyfriend have been having some problems and yes we argue alot but that is understandable because every cuople goes through it. so recently his mother came up for a visit and i was on my best behavior and of course i was nothing but nice to her offered to take her out to eat and everything but of course the whole time that she was here she stayed away from me and did not spend anytime with me so i took it like she did not like me so on the fourth day that she was here she came to my house and told me that things are not working out with me and her son and that she was moving him out and hard the nerve to ask me did i have any questions for her. in all honesty why would i have and questions for her. and he just stood there and let his mother say what ever she wanted to say abd she took my cell phone that i was paying the bill on cause it was in her son name and of course she still wanted me to pay the bill which i dont see why she took it since he was not paying anything towards the bill so it was a free phone and a way for her to get in touch with him so after all this i helped him pack and he had the nerve to come back a week later and tell me that he was giving me my phone back because his mother left and he only took it because she told him too what kind of bull is that . i did not take the phone back i went and got my own .... now he is still coming around trying to make good what should i do
8 responses
@speedy1279 (2670)
• United States
13 Oct 10
Honestly, I would tell him to get lost. Trust me! You don't want someone that lets his mother speak to you like that. I know from experience. I recently went through a divorce about two years ago. I was still living in the same house as my ex because I was in the middle of trying to find a place to stay. I had come home from work late at night and noticed my laptop missing. I questioned him and he said water had got spilled on it and he gave it to his brother in law to fix. Well that really upset me and I told him that was it and I was leaving that night. Little did I know his mother was at our house asleep in the bedroom. I go into the bathroom to get some of my stuff and she cornered me telling me that I needed to grow up and stop the nonsense of leaving her son and told me to go to bed (like I was her own daughter to boss around). Of course I put my foot down and told her to get out of my way and that she had no right to speak to me that way. Now the whole time my ex-husband just stode there and said nothing. Not once did he stand up for me and tell his mother she was out of line. Yet he swore up and down that he truly loved me. So I look at it this way. If the guy truly loved you, then he wouldn't have stood by and let his mother treat you that way. So he is not worth your time.
1 person likes this
@tlaquan (177)
• United States
14 Oct 10
that is what im thinking to because he stole my mini laptop because i refuse to pay the bill for that cell phone that we had together but i got it back cause he had no right to take it and he still thinks his mom has a right to say what she wants to me now he lives with his uncle and she told the uncle that he can have any female there except me and he finds no harm in that even when i tell him that she is running his life from 400 miles away and him and his uncle listens to her the uncle had the nerve to tell him that when i come sit in front of his house in my car because he asked me to pick him up thats a problem too
• United States
14 Oct 10
Wow, seems like he is alot like my ex. I honestly would stay clear of him because if he lets his mom and uncle control him, in the end he may end up trying to control you. And that is not something you should have to endure or put up with.
@gloryacam (5546)
• Philippines
14 Oct 10
It all boils down to - do you really love him enough to take the sh*t he and his mother got you through before? If yes, by all means, take him back and prepare for a round 2 with his mom. If not, good-bye mama's boy! First, he could not stand up for you or maybe, he agreed with his mom that thing weren't working out. The fact is that he left you there and just that. I love and respect boys who love their mommas, but, when the mom is a biatch, sorry, I won't take that crap.
@tlaquan (177)
• United States
14 Oct 10
i like the way that you phrased that lol she is one of those and yes he is a mamas boy and he is not gonna stand up to his mom but for the life of me i do love him and sometimes it is hard to let go but i think i will find a way eventually i hope
@gloryacam (5546)
• Philippines
14 Oct 10
I sincerely hope you get through this. It's heartbreaking to see girls go through this especially when they really love the man (I'll say boy in your case. If you can get out of your feelings for him, it will do you good. Just imagine how it will be if you eventually marry him... And how it will be for your kids when you have them. I know they say that if you two are in love, nothing will get in the way. But, as I see it, he won't be there for you when it comes the time the you two need to fight for your love.
@angelface23 (2502)
• United States
14 Oct 10
i think it's so wimpy that he couldn't even break up with you himself. His mother had to do it. And if his mother only said that to you because she doesn't want him with you then he should have the balls to stick up for himself and say different. He is not a man and I would stay the heck away from him. maybe he can date his mom?? lol
@tlaquan (177)
• United States
14 Oct 10
i think that you are right and he really does want someone like his mom ( ilk ) but hey to each his own lol
• United States
14 Oct 10
Sweetheart, this should be a great lesson for you - actually, him moving out with his mom is the best thing that ever happened to you! What if you guys were married and this happened, OMG. Honey you need a MAN, someone who will take care of his own business. In fact, in a relationship, it's respectful and honorable for parents (On both sides)to MIND THEIR OWN BUSINESS. When my wife and I were dating and then later married, I established this EARLY in our relationship. I went to both sides and said, 'Look, I'm the man around here and if there are any problems, we will take care of them between each other.' Now, that doesn't mean that I can't take advice from them, after all, they have the experience, but, when I'm working out issues with my loved one, that's on my own. Girl, stop paying that bill, get your own phone and move on!!
@tlaquan (177)
• United States
14 Oct 10
thank you for the words of encouragement pastor that i what i did i had to get another phone and he is mad about that but oh well but like i said to saomeone else he dont see anything wrong with what his mother did so i do think that it time to let him go
• India
14 Oct 10
It is the question of the his mother. Better ask him straight if he would accept you as wife even if his mother opposes. If he says he will, then there is no problem. But in case he says he cannot, then it is time you have to think over it.
@tlaquan (177)
• United States
14 Oct 10
welll he tells me that it is not what his mother wants but he still holds her opinion in high regard and wants to do the things that pleases her but i doubt if he can let go of his mother leg and be a real man
• United States
14 Oct 10
If I was you, I would look for a real man, not a momma's boy who can't even express his own feelings for you, or at least stand up for you. How childish is it, for a man? to have his mommy dump you. I think if you are serious about this guy, he needs to prove to you that he can handle his own business and stand up to his mom, because if he can't, you will just keep going through the same thing over and over again. The next time she doesn't approve of something you do, test him to see if he will stand up to his mom and stand up for you. If not, tell him to hit the high road.
@tlaquan (177)
• United States
14 Oct 10
i know that he is not going to stand up to his mom for me because he had the nerve to tell me that they only way that she will respect me is if i was to get pregnant by him what kind of nonsense is that he does not see how that would cause more problems i can see it know her tell my child mean things about me .....
@poshearns (133)
15 Oct 10
nge! he had the nerve to dump you? and the mom? ha! imagine that. i think you are better off without him. he is such a big momma's boy. you will have a lot of problems with him if you are to marry him in the future. and the momma will forever get in the way.she does not know her limits.
• United States
14 Oct 10
Wow, incredible. I think that is probably the best thing that could've happened to you. I understand that the relationship is maybe over and it is sometimes hard to accept, but it's sounds like you are better off without him and his mother. Any man that lets his mother controls his every move, especially when it comes to his personal and love relationship is a coward. He's man enough to make his own choices and if he loved you and your relationship meant anything to him he would an should've faught for you. It's better to have found out now and you know what to expect than later on the road it could've hit you even harder. His mother was way out of line, she had no business interferring. I know mothers sometimes get in the way, but what she should've have done was talked to him and tell him her feelings and have him make the choice. Because as a mother we are sometimes blind sided. Personally, I don't know how long you have been in this relationship the more time you are involved the harder it gets, but based on what you wrote it seems that this is the first time you've met his mother, so that relationship should've be so advance. I would try and break it off little by little because his mother is going to continue making your life a living hell as well as your relationship and it's probably not going to work. But I wish you the best of luck!!!