if lover doesnt feel the need to talk with u everyday means he doesnt love u?O_O
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
Portugal
October 25, 2010 1:02pm CST
hi guys^^
if your lover doesnt feel the need to talk with you everyday means that he doesnt love you? i need to know bcs my bf sometimes really seems he loves me but other times i dont know what to think. like past week everyday he was messaging me, wasting mney of his cell just for us to talk^^ i was too happy^^ but yesterday i used the same site we use to talk and i sent him an sms and he didnt answer and i thought he doesnt have money is ok. bcs we live in different countries and is so expensive that he sends me sms everyday so i didnt mind that he didnt send me yesterday. but today i saw that he came online when i wasnt bcs we have different hours and he comes online but usually we send messages to each other. but he didnt send me a message today. so is two days already without message each other. or without him messaging me. what should i think? is like he always act like this. sometimes care, sometimes dont. and i dont know what to think. but i feel that is more important to me to see him than he comes to see me. like work here in mylot. i said if he cant find a job for now that he could work here. in the bit he comes online. and he messaged his friend so could also be a bit here but i saw that he didnt. if he really loved me he would find a way to be with me without i be always asking his attention. i feel that im always asking for it. and love is something we do bcs we love to. and i thought he was trying to make things work past week. but today he came online and neither a little message he sent me. when i love a guy i always want at least talk with him everyday so why doesnt he feel that need? bcs doesnt love me truly maybe. i guess he loves me but maybe im not his true love. can you please advise me? boys and girls^^ i need both sides^^ 
3 people like this
20 responses
@mustafarox (453)
• India
27 Oct 10
Well I feel that speaking to your lover everyday may be possible or may not be possible and in your relationship it would be really difficult but it is not necessary to speak every day if your doesn't speak to you everyday doesn't mean that he doesn't love it means that he really trusts you and he knows that you are fine and who knows he would be busy in searching jobs online or some where else so I think you should think about such topics it will just make life more hard to live thats it and it will just make you worry more and fill more negative thoughts in your mind....I hope you would try to understand or clear things with your boyfriend soon.....
1 person likes this
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
27 Oct 10
yes we solved that already^^ i gave him a chance^^ yes one day doesnt mean he doesnt love me^^ but is like you say if he was searching a job would be great but he cant for now. he needs to help his family. so i said for him to work here^^ but seems that he doesnt want i dont know :( i cant just me work or we cant see each other soon. what i earn here isnt enough to go to his country at all.
@eurekafemme (5877)
• Philippines
26 Oct 10
Oh, C'mon on , Cat.:) You don't have to be overly sensitive about this thing. My boyfriend (now husband) used to be like this when we were first starting out the relationsahip. He's term was "I can never get enough of you". But things changed as well as people... Sad but this is the reality and it sucks, doesn't it?
Give your bf he benefit of a doubt. He has no work, right? and maybe, he was online to seek assistance from his friends or people he can only talk via the use of an internet. And looking for a work can make your bf real busy. That is his top priority , I must say, for now. The mere fact that money is the issue why you two can not be together is frustrating enough, so finding a work can be both beneficial for you and him and your relationship.:)
Here's what you must do, DO NOT WAIT FOR HIM TO ALWAYS MAKE THE FIRST MOVE. It will do you both good if he feels that you are also reaching out to him. Men, also want to feel that they are wanted and need. So make the first move, dear. Show him that you are there for him and you are thinking of him even if you tow are not really talking that much...
Good luck, Cat.Cheer up. There's no need to feel worried about this.:)
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
26 Oct 10
but the problem is that eureka. since he asked me to be with him and he cared much then he didnt care that much and is always me making the initiative. thats why i wanted he did that now. and he is doing that^^ thats why i gave him a chance. about a job he says he cant find one for now bcs has to help his mother taking care of his nephews. and sure i wanted that he found a job but he cant :( i even said for him to help me and work here too so we both can save some together. if we both work hard we could win maybe 100 and something dollars that is good money in pinas right? so would be great if we cant find nothing better for now. but he doesnt :(
@_sketch_ (5742)
• United States
25 Oct 10
Don't jump to conclusions. He's probably just busy and/or tired. If it's only a few days I really don't see it being a big deal. Just ask him straightforward. Tell him about your concern and maybe he'll try to send u something quick like a hello, on the days he doesn't have time to really talk.
1 person likes this
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
25 Oct 10
yes i told him before^^ he knows that is important to me that we talk everyday. he promised he would talk with me everyday. but now he isnt doing as he promised again. i feel i always believe in his promises and i expect much. and then he doesnt do as he promise. i just would like him to make me some surprises sometimes saying he loves me. or something cute without i expect it you know.
@shibham (16977)
• India
26 Oct 10
Hi sweet who is really so sweet.
Okay, i am ready to advice you. i know much about love as a writer ( hahahaha..)
So before any advice, some questions to you?
Have you ever met him in person?
How much you know him and his family?
How much you can trust him as he lives in an another country?
Just these three. Be patient in love, results are there.
take care.
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
27 Oct 10
he said he would work to come to my country^^ but for now he cant bcs needs to help his mother with home things^^ but i told him to work here like me^^ so we can save more money^^ i dont know if he will work here or not like me^^ but would be great if he did that^^ we could save more money for my trip^^ i dont mind to go see him as long as he helps me to save the money^^ that way i feel that isnt only me that wants to see him but he wants it also^^
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
26 Oct 10
thanks shibham^^ for being sweet also^^ i didnt meet him in person yet. we met online only since a year already. we are lovers since 1 month and few days. about his family i know he lives with his mother, his father and his two sisters ^^ he also has a brother and has nephews that he is helping his mum taking care of^^ i trust him bcs we talk since more than a year so^^ and that year he always loved me thats why^^ i have many patience but sure need to feel love and care too^^ thanks for your worry^^ take care too^^
@wollivierre (688)
• United States
26 Oct 10
no talking everyday doesn't mean they love you or not, i don't talk to my best fred everyday but i know she loves me. and i talk to people everyday and i don't love them for me talking to them everyday isn't necessary but it is nice.
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
26 Oct 10
yes^^ you know that she loves you and she doesnt talk with you everyday. so maybe thats not those big loves that make the heart stops. bcs if was neither one day you could be without even a little message to each other. is the reality. in true love is impossible even one day without talk unless you are very hurt. but if you are not is impossible.
@wollivierre (688)
• United States
27 Oct 10
i don't think so i mean talking isn't everything its what you talk about that matters and how that person makes you feel. not talking isn't a big deal when you can't.
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
27 Oct 10
sure what we talk about matters more than talk often^^ but talk everyday for me is a must^^ i love my bf very much so i need him everyday^^ even one day not talking i dont like it^^ but sure i wont leave him bcs of that^^ i know that if he doesnt talk everyday is bcs he cant. or else he would^^ i love him much^^ thats why i need it so much^^
@lxho99 (74)
• Malaysia
26 Oct 10
Yes. I agree with you.
If your lover don't want to talk to you, or he feel tedious or lazy to talk to you, that means he doesn't put you as first priority, he doesn't care you anymore. If this case happen, you have to be careful as he may be find another lover again.
However, sometimes may different, your lover may be busy at his works, he is rush on his job. So, he does not have mush time to spend to talk you. In this case, you need to be understand, and cooperate with him, don't go to bother him as he is stress already.
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
26 Oct 10
yes sure^^ i should be his priority but now he is trying to make things work so^^ anyway i know that he wont cheat on me^^ he isnt like that. if he liked other girl he would tell me. about him being busy with work he isnt bcs he doesnt have a job^^ and i always understand him much bcs he helps his family at home so^^ anyway now im giving him a chance^^
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
27 Oct 10
yes i always listen to him^^ and im trying that we be happy^^ but it seems that im always doing more for us to meet. thats why im not happy sometimes. bcs i wish that he also felt the need to work for us to save enough. i know he cant find a real job bcs has to help his mother. i just wanted that he worked at least here for us to save money and meet near. you understand? ^^
@roxyoo7 (246)
• India
26 Oct 10
Well only you can answer this question. I mean he's your BF and you must be having a better idea about his nature. Chances are that he might be busy and so couldn't reply you or he must be having some problems due to which he didn't think it apporpriate to contact you or something like that but again as you are his GF so you must be having a better idea about his problems.
The best thing right now would be to cool your head and think about something else. Wait for like a week or so and give him time to sort out his problems, in case there are any and then see if contacts you or not. If not then try to go into depth and try to find out truth or reality. Maybe its time for you to into detail and talk to him openly.
Just make sure that you don't mess up your relation because of such a small things. I guess you are mature enough to understand that much.
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
27 Oct 10
yes i am mature and i wouldnt destroy our relation for small things. but is not a small thing. this happened before also. before he almost didnt have time for me and we are very far. just now he is trying to have more time for me but still we have problems bcs im working only here in this site to save money to go see him. and if is only me to do that is almost impossible that we meet near :(
@sender621 (14894)
• United States
26 Oct 10
Love doesn't always need to be expressed with just words. it can be expressed just as strongly with actions. If a lover doesn't talk as much, it doesn't mean that the love is not there. there could be several reasons that there is silence from your lover. Let your lover know how you feel and watch for the reaction. You will know if they love you or not. You don't need words to do this.@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
26 Oct 10
i said words bcs he is far from me. thats why we can use only words or small actions like call each other or make a video showing love or a letter or a cute note^^ but we just talk with each other mostly. so thats why i said he doesnt talk with me always is bad. and sure actions for me mean much more than words. thats why im giving him a chance bcs he is caring more these days^^
@Royalty10 (196)
• Guyana
27 Oct 10
Anticipation is good for any relationship, I believe. So, I'd say its important for couples to spend time apart so that the grow to appreciate each other more when they are together.
Besides if you spend too much time with your partner you begin to tire of them. Well i think so anyway.
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
27 Oct 10
i wouldnt get tired of him^^ but we are not near each other. so we need to talk everyday to feel that we both care and love each other^^ we are very far and didnt meet near yet. so we really need that to be sure that it can work^^ im working here to save money to go see him^^ and also to help my mum sure^^ but also to go see him soon^^ thats why i need talk with him everyday^^
@anneish (117)
• Philippines
26 Oct 10
girl...don't base the love of your bf to you by that matter.
so unreasonable.,maybe his just busy that's why he did not text you or he has something to do that day...don't be so negative...your just the one who's making your relationship difficult...because in the end you were the one that will suffer the pain that you made...because of thinking negative things about your bf.
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
26 Oct 10
is not unreasonable. if we love someone we need to care always. so thats why i was angry with him. a little message everyday was all i ever asked. and he also saw that he acted wrong so you shouldnt say that i dont have a reason to be like this bcs i have. anyway if i thought negative was bcs i had reasons to get hurt. everyone gets hurt when in love.
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
23 Nov 10
is ok anneish^^ no i know he has other things to do and we are not lovers anymore. but i just wanted a message from him everyday even. we didnt to talk for long i just wanted to be sure that he was fine bcs we were so far that i just wanted to feel closer and feel that my work to go and see him would worth it^^ but things ended but still we are waiting for each other i guess^^
@anneish (117)
• Philippines
5 Nov 10
i apologize for my comment...sorry if you got hurt of what I've said.
but all you need to do is to widen your understanding for your bf,and as you said just for a day that he doesn't text you you reacted like that...i know you love him but he is also a person that has a personal things to do,and that's maybe his reason for not texting you...and i think that's the best thing to do understand him for some instances...cuz if every time he will not text you for a day you will get mad at him you will just making problem in your relationship..
happy mylotting!
1 person likes this
@Sanitary (3968)
• Singapore
26 Oct 10
If your bf does not see the news to talk to u, it does not mean he don't love u anymore. Maybe he just needs his own space and privacy. He knows by responding to u, he won't be able to concentrate on whatever he's doing. I believe he misses u just as much and wants to talk to u too. However work is his priority and he needs to be online than wanting to be there. He has sort of make it up to u by calling and talking to u for the last few days leading to the disappearance right? If u really want to know more, ask him directly whn both of u start talking again.
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
27 Oct 10
yes he is trying to make things work now^^ thats why i gave him a chance^^ the only thing that continues the same is the fact that he cant work for now and is ok i understand but i just said for him to work here also in mylot like me so we can save more. but is so rare he comes here. with his little comments we almost cant make any money to see each other 
thats what makes me sad now.
thats what makes me sad now.1 person likes this
@jmayangcoF (279)
• Philippines
27 Oct 10
hmmmh mawybe,,., he doesn't love me.,,or he has another gf,.,., so he don't w3ant to talk to me.,,
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
27 Oct 10
he doesnt have another gf. i trust him^^ i know he loves me but i just wish that he dedicated more to our relationship^^ i know that he is trying to make things work these days but i just wish he found a way to save money to come see me. for us to save money together. that way one of us can go see the other^^ but if we dont save money together will be almost impossible :(
@donnaphipps (145)
• United States
26 Oct 10
just give him some time. since yall are in different time zones, maybe he is busy. i can understand that he wouldnt message you bc he doesnt have money on him phone but im not sure why he wouldnt message you on the computer. maybe he is just busy. i would only be worried if he didnt talk to you for a week or two. two days aint nothing
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
26 Oct 10
two days is nothing when you have a bf that you can see everyday and touch and kiss and hold. but me i cant. we are very far. so talk everyday is very important. so we feel that love is here. or else how can we feel the will to fight to be together? for that we need to show each other we love and will do what we can to meet soon. or else we dont love.
@hellosunset (38)
• Romania
26 Oct 10
well,maybe she is not your true love. I feel the same way because my boyfriend is very cold sometimes . He simply doesn`t want to see me or talk with me. I think you must let her to do what she want because if she is you true love, she will still with you. If not, maybe is better like this...
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
27 Oct 10
im trying to giving him a second chance^^ but sometimes i feel that if i dont work to see him he will wait things to come. he cant find a real job now and i understand i just wanted that he worked here for example and tried to save some money for us. but seems to me that he doesnt want to do that sometimes i dont know what to think.
sometimes i dont know what to think.
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
25 Oct 10
hello cat,
Don't worry dear,he must be busy with his work.
Don't think negative as early as this.
Relax and take a deep breath and tell yourself not to worry.
Sometimes boys are not as sweet like us (girls)
He will explain soon what makes him too busy to leave a single word to message you.
Or why can't he send you sms
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
25 Oct 10
he doesnt work. and he messaged his friend so could had message me too. sometimes i feel that im not that important to him like he is to me. i thought we would be so happy. like a fairytale. he loved me since long ago and now i dont know i dont feel him so excited about us being together like he should. i just wanted he found a job soon and we would save money to see each other. but he will just find one next year and maybe he cant :( thanks for your support^^
@hushi22 (4928)
•
26 Oct 10
are you sure of "doesnt feel the need"? hmmm...maybe it doesnt necessarily mean the guy doesnt love you. actually there was a time when my bf told me that there were days that he didnt want to talk to me and that he felt guilty but his reason was sometimes it makes him feel even more sad and upset to know that i am here far from him. but there are also times that he seek for me and my voice. he still loves me though. =)
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
26 Oct 10
yes i see that sometimes he didnt want to talk with you bcs he felt that maybe you already spent much time together. but me and my bf we cant see each other almost never. thats why message everyday is very important to me. anyway you are far from your bf? but wasnt you near him? anyway im happy that he seeks for you and your voice^^ and that he loves you^^
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
25 Oct 10
My dear sweet, I am getting worried about you. You are getting more and more stress on a daily basis. I know you do not want to hear this but I think you need time for you.
You need time to figure out what is best for you and this honey is too stressful for you. Maybe a few days without speaking to each other may make and or break the relationship.
I sure hope you get all the love in the world you deserve. Sometimes it comes quick and sometimes it takes a life time. Please take care of your self first, always.
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
25 Oct 10
yes you are right^^ im too stressed lately. and hurts me that he doesnt try to be with him. i just wanted i was his first priority and he saved money to come and see me^^ thats all i wanted. and i sent him a message today saying that he has one week to decide what he wants. i explained how i felt and i said for one week i wont say nothing so he sees what he really feels for me^^ and sure i cant forget myself. i always forget about myself when fall for a guy but i cant.
@Karunvig (714)
• India
25 Oct 10
yes i agree.. if u r partner can eat everyday live everyday and smile everyday without you then ur need is less and importance is NIL in his / her life... communication is must in relation and misundertnding are very rare... Dont hope nythng in relation ... wht u have is what u have... nthng else gonna be urs !!
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
25 Oct 10
yes is good to have a good communication in a relationship^^ thats very important thats true^^ and if we dont have is bad for the relation. it can end. about him do everything everyday and doesnt need me everyday well i feel that sometimes he could care more really but he doesnt so what can i do? i cant force him to care. he has to care bcs he wants to.
@doray1960 (98)
• Philippines
26 Oct 10
For me, I don't think that loves you as much as you love him. There are really rimes that you'll encounter such kind of men. If he acts that way it's just obvious that he is falling out love to you. It's that's the case then why do you still insist yourself on him. You'll just be hurt by his coldness. Why don't you look around you/ There's still a lot of guys around who would love you more.
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
26 Oct 10
i guess is his personality. i also thought he didnt care enough but today he showed me he really needs me^^ so i gave him other chance^^ i got hurt yes but i will see what he will do for us^^ anyway about other guys to love me i dont know^^ im not that pretty girl^^ so i dont have many many guys after me ahah also i love my bf only so i dont want find other person. but thanks for your worry^^
@uniteamm (18)
• Philippines
26 Oct 10
hello, im just new with mylot but not new with a relationship! well, i will stand on the point of view of a guy.. i myself was a smalltalker one, i mean... i do seldom talk to my loveone but rather show them how i feel... guys have different way of showing their affection to woman, they are not that showy sometimes unlike woman whos nature is really sweet and passionate, ei, am not saying man are cold as stone, they're quite sweet and protective and lovers, sometime if your man aint talking that much! give him that small space of less talk coz i think hedoesnt really want totalk, but it doesnt mean he love you less.
@sweetloveforeve (13106)
• Portugal
26 Oct 10
yes i guess you are right that guys doesnt show their emotions as much as us women^^ anyway i know they are not cold and are sweet but i just wish i had a bf that always said he loves me everyday^^ and sometimes made me little surprises like a cute video or a cute note^^ anything ^^ but is ok^^ i have to accept him for who he is. and as long as he loves me thats the most important thanks for your advises^^
thanks for your advises^^