Do you have friends who only stick with you for certain reasons?
December 11, 2010 8:10pm CST
Does anyone have a friend who only sticks around because they receive some sort of benefit. One examples would be a person who's friends with another only because of their money. I have a similar problem. I'm starting to think that one of my friends sticks around with me because she wants money and gifts. I'm not rich at all but she still gives off hints so that I can give her money. Her b-day was today and for about a month she kept reminding me about her b-day. She kept telling me not to forget about her b-day and especially not to forget to buy her a gift. I've also let her borrow money sometimes but she never pays me back. If I ask her about it she always says that she already payed me. I'm starting to think that I should just ask her about everything?
12 Dec 10
You should ask her, perez. After all it's your money and you should ask her to return it. Some people are just so selfish. They do not even understand the meaning of friendship. I have been lucky to have some great friends. I do not have many friends but the ones that I do have, are precious. I have never had problems like these. Sure someone borrows money every now and then. Sometimes they even deny the fact that I have given them any money. But I know they are just kidding. Eventually when they do return the money.
• United States
17 Dec 10
Well the friend I mentioned jokes about saying that she doesn't owe me. But then eventually I forget all about it until much later I remember and ask her about. So I guess that's her way of avoiding to pay me. Sometimes she even takes credit for some of the things I do. I have few friends too and some of them are really nice to me but others aren't. I'll just eventually confront her about it and if doesn't work out then I guess I have to take better methods.
12 Dec 10
hi m_perez, If your friend acts that way, it seems that she just want something on you. Not paying her debts and fooling you that she already pay you while the truth is not is like she is a friend that cannot be trusted. Well, I am a kind of person that always want to be true so that people around me will be true to me also. If a friend did it to me once, not paying her debt, it would be ok. However, if she not pay her debt and then make me like a fool trying to convince me she paid me already but eventually, she is not, then I will get away from her. True friends are really hard to find especially if you are a kind of person who possess popularity and wealth. Well, this is just my opinion. Listen to your heart and your mind and think of. what is the best decision.
• United States
12 Dec 10
I do have this sort of friend. He only walks up to me to ask for money, and most of the time I give it to him willingly. Even though you probably don't want to be a bad person in this case, I would just refuse to give that person money and explain that she never pays you back. This should get her to think about what she's done. You don't have to be cruel, but don't let people walk all over you either. :)
12 Dec 10
I do not, as i know who those kinds of people are and i got rid of those people years ago.I think that at least two of my friends have got a friend like that.These are the people that we can do without.I have really good friends thankfully and they are the friends that everyone would like to have.One of my friends have a few friends that go tosee her when they want her to get things for them as well as get things that they can not afford until the following week, however my friend has got very wise to that and is now going to stop helping these types of people.
12 Dec 10
I don't think I have one as I always try to get to know someone very well first before I include them into my circle of close friends. I know my fiance's friend is something like that. He's the kind of friend who loves to hang around if you're not having any problems or whatever. He's there when he wants to ask you a favor. But when you need something from him like when my fiance got sick and he had no one to turn to, he took him to the hospital but charged him for the gas on his car. If my fiance had not had ten bucks, his friend would have pestered him about it for doing him a favor. I think that friend of yours isn't really a true friend because she only "sticks around" or hangs out with you because she knows you are capable of giving her some stuff or help her out but try to test her if one time, say you needed a hand on something or ask her if she can help you do a favor, if she says "Yeah I'll help you out" then she isn't just "using" you for her own welfare. But if she shrugs and say "Sorry I can't help you out" or starts making an excuse then I'm sorry but she should not be labelled as a "friend" because friendship is a two-way road, you give and take, not just take and take. And when it comes to money, a friend will never "milk" you for it and lie afterwards saying they've paid you already. Anyways, I hope you can sort this thing out with her and if not then you really should find a more trustworthy friend.
12 Dec 10
i've had these kind when i was a teenager of course, i didn't know people but i don't have for years now and if i find these kind of people they are not my friends in the next day, frienship means loving without a reason, if is there any interest behind i don't consider friendship cause i'm like that too
19 Jan 11
Hi m_perez, It's sad to have such a friend. She is not deserved to be called "friend", perez. I think you should have known her really face the very first time when she didn't pay your money back. If I were you, there would be no second chance for her to borrow any penny from me. Be alert in any relationship, dear. Thanks God that I've never have any friends like that.
19 Dec 10
good thing i dont have friends like that who stick for money or whatsoever. my friends have been there with or without money. they wait for me to share with them whatever stuff i have bcuz i easily could get offended. i have such sensitive feelings. i dont really know what theyre after me but they never ask too much. we pay for our own bills if we go out sometimes if i have extra money i offer to treat them with food. ;)
13 Dec 10
that would not qualify as real friendship if she's only there to ask you for something like money. more like taking advantage of you. well, you have to decide if you're going to keep her friendship or not. friendships are based on trust, loyalty, love, fun, and not being opportunistic. i think you should ask what her real intentions are, and stop giving her money already.
12 Dec 10
As for your main question, yes, I do have friends who stick to me for their own purpose. In this world, not everyone are true friends. In fact, good and true ones are hard to come by. I myself seen many friends come and go. Most of the time is because they found someone 'better' to 'help them out'. It is a sad fact but, i feel that we ourselves have to be smart in choosing our own friends.