Do you think that parents are to be blamed for their children's wrongdoing?

@wonga94 (218)
Singapore
December 14, 2010 6:53am CST
Hi mylotters! Some people say that parents should take responsibility for their child's actions. Nowadays, children are becoming more daring and rebellious because of their parents doting ways. What about you? What's your take on this?
3 people like this
16 responses
• United States
14 Dec 10
helllllllllll no I tought my child right from wrong from the time she could understand me. There is no way I would feel the blame for anything she may go outside and do.. That would never happen..
2 people like this
@wonga94 (218)
• Singapore
16 Dec 10
Hi gitsandbagscom! Parents should educate their child from young so they will know your expectation of them. Disciplining a child in the early age of their life is crucial as it plays a part in their character as they grow up.
• Singapore
14 Dec 10
I agree. In my country, a lot of children are being spoiled as their parents don't have the heart to punish their children by caning them. When asked why, they just say they don't bear to see their children get hurt. But in the end, when their children grows up and does bad things, who will get hurt the most? It's not the child, but the parents. Parents should be the one to guide their children to the right path and punish them if need be. Recently, there have been gangsterism cases in my country and the police have been on the look out for youngsters staying out late. They caught a group of them last month and asked them some questions. Those youngsters were very rebellious and rude and even dared to talk back to the police! Now I wonder how parents teach their child. A child's attitude and behavior is slowly carved out by their parents. If they don't have good attitude and behavior, then the parents have to be blamed.
1 person likes this
@wonga94 (218)
• Singapore
14 Dec 10
Hi JudgeIronFist! Yeah, what's with all the slashing nowadays? Is that the only way to solve problems? By using violence? That's why i blame parents for their child's wrongdoings. Sometimes i even see parents behave exactly like their children. That's why they say, parents are the role models of their children.
1 person likes this
@angelsmummy (1700)
14 Dec 10
Sometimes it is the fault of the parent, due to not being there and not caring, but generlly children and teenagers rebel, no matter what upbringing they have had... When people slag parents off about the way their child has turned out I think its very mean and parents dont deserve it. As a parent myself i know I will do anything for my girls but Im sure that one day they are going to rebel, but I do have strict routines and disapline with them. I will always be there for them no matter ho0w they turn out and I would hate for someone to judge me if they went a bit crazy for a point in their life therefore I never judge anyone else!
1 person likes this
@wonga94 (218)
• Singapore
16 Dec 10
Hi angelsmummy! Children should be taught right from wrong from the beginning and be strict in disciplining a child. But i guess times have change and parents rarely use the rod as a tool in disciplining their child.
16 Dec 10
Well my girls are only 1 and 2 but I do have strict boundaries likie I said. At the moment they are very respectful, say please and thank you, and my 2 year old will even open doors for people if she can. I would never hit my children though...
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
14 Dec 10
It is so easy for us to blame the parents when a child does something wrong. It is not always the parents' fault that a child does wrong. Parents do need to take responsibility for their children, but blame shouldn't be one of them. A child is taught right from wrong. Parents guide them in the best ways that they can. Children make their choices. The children should be the ones to answer for their deeds and not the parents.
1 person likes this
@wonga94 (218)
• Singapore
16 Dec 10
Hi sender621! Well, both parties are to be blamed. Parents should know how to discipline their child from the earliest of age. But when their child is all grown up and is able to think for himslef/herself, the blame no longer falls on the parents.
@rappeter13 (5298)
• Romania
14 Dec 10
Parents have a great influence on the children's behavior, so they can be blamed for how their kids act. But because of children spending a lot of time in the school and outside their home, there are other influences as well. So it is not only the parents' fault. I think that a parent has to look after the children, but cannot act like a cop, because in the end he/she will end being hated by the kids. This is why is very important for children to be raised in the first years by the parents and not by babysitters. In the first years a child can be taught the principles and the unwritten rules of life, so it is very important for the parents to make their job well. But as I said, because of the long time spent outside their home later, children have other influences as well, which can change their way of acting.
1 person likes this
@wonga94 (218)
• Singapore
16 Dec 10
Hi rappeter13! Lead by example as they always say. Parents should be a good role model for children of a young age as they are not able to make good decision on their own yet. I agree with you saying that parents should not be too strict with their children. Disciplining a child is like flying a kite. You need to know when to let go and when to reel them back in.
• Philippines
14 Dec 10
well parents may be a big part in a person's character.. but not everything a person will do will be blamed on them.. parents are there to teach us and guide us specially during our younger years.. when we don't know much of the world yet.. they teach us what is wrong and what is right.. but when time comes, that a person can already decide for himself, parents are not to be blamed.. of course a person can already choose what he wants and what he doesn't.. so whatever choices they make, whatever things they do, whatever words their say, it's their choice.. and nobody should be blamed for that except themselves.. they choose the consequences they want to receive..
@wonga94 (218)
• Singapore
16 Dec 10
Hi stephmanimbao! Yeah i totally agree with you. At the earlier part of their life the parents are responsible for their action. However, when it comes to the point where they are able to think for themselves and make decision the parents don't have to take responsibility anymore.
• Philippines
14 Dec 10
being a very rebellious and often times in a lot of mischief myself, I don't think parent's should be blamed for their children's negative behavior, there are times where the child has this negative trait that may be a product of how they were born(basing on my experience because I had to be forced out by a forceps), or they fell into a bad group of friends (common thing that goes on now), or for some other factor that the child is just plain evil... Most parents do their best to make sure that their children grow up to be good people but yeah there are those who are detrimental to the child's growth and maybe in this rare cases they could be blamed but for me, it's rare, only more publicized....
@wonga94 (218)
• Singapore
16 Dec 10
Hi marapplestiffy! I believe that times have changed and parents spare the rod in disciplining their child. Yeah, sometimes we all tend to like being popular in school and therefore is being tempted into joining bad group of friends. That's when the parents are no longer to be blame.
@sajujohn (1009)
• India
14 Dec 10
I don't think it is not good to blaim parents fro their Children's wrong doing.For all the wrong doing's only childresn are responsible and is nothing in relation with their parents.Children will be well aware of the outcomings of their deeds and what should parents do even if their child go wrong.Parents can only teach theri children only by words and rest of the things wholely depend on the children.
@wonga94 (218)
• Singapore
16 Dec 10
Hi sajujohn! Yeah parents aren't to be blamed when a child that is already a teenager makes mistake. But parents are to be blamed when it comes to disciplining their child in the early age of their life. That's when it is most crucial for a child to know the right from wrong.
@Sanitary (3969)
• Singapore
15 Dec 10
Yes, I agree that parents are responsible for the behavior of their children. However most parents won't admit their fault when it comes to upbringing. Their excuse is always, wanting the best for their child and so parents give them whatever they want. With that habit of having things their way easily, children take it for granted and by time parents want to change them, it's too late. However there will be parents who don't see the negative side of over pampering and even side with them. For children of such parents, I can only wish them the best when they start working.
@xkenzo (57)
• Singapore
15 Dec 10
I think its either directly or indirectly, parents are to be blamed. Children tend to start being rebellious at a young age and i think the parent should notice it and take proper action before they get out of hand. Parents these days tend to be over concern about their child or are too busy to care for them. I think parents should let their child be "themselves" and guild them along the way.
@jaiho2009 (39019)
• Philippines
15 Dec 10
hello, That depends on the situation. No sane parents ever wanted to see their kids done wrong things. Every parents wanted to see their kids grow as a good person and citizen and even dreamed their kids to be a successful one. Now,if a child goes wrong that is because they choice to be one. And a bad child only realizes everything about their parents sacrifices and advises once they become parent/s themselves. In a situation where there are parents who doesn't have enough time to guide their kids,maybe they are to be blame for that. But there are also parents who doesn't has the capacity to guide and took care of their kids personally they're working abroad...and it's for the sake of their kids. I pity parents who has a lot of sacrifices working abroad or in a far place for the sake of giving their kids a brighter future..but it turns out to be the wrong way because they were not able to guide and care for their kids personally. Again,kids realized their wrong doings once they become a parents themselves...and repentance comes at last ... have a great day
@ebuscat (5949)
• Philippines
15 Dec 10
For me if the parents don't know how to take there responsibility they would blame if not then it is not the blame of it is Satan because he is the ruler of this earth now.
• Philippines
15 Dec 10
For me, it depends on what wrongdoing the child committed. If it is something that should have been taught and prevented by the parents, then I really don't think that the parents should be liable or blamed. The parents always try to instill something good in their children (unless the parents themselves can be really considered as unfit or wrong). They try their best to provide everything - it is quite heartbreaking for a parent to try their very best, fail at something and get blamed in the process. For doting parents or parents who like to spoil their children, then the fault is at them for not fulfilling the duties of a parent. Parenting is tough, but it isn't an excuse to be negligent especially when it comes to their children.
• Tokelau
15 Dec 10
i believe we're both to blame, children and parents. can't really put the blame on one. it depends, from person to person, if their parents took good care of them, or they became rebellious because of whatever happened to them, there are countless cases.
• United States
14 Dec 10
I think that parents should take some responsibility for their child actions,if another child is hurt up to 17 years old. Being rebellious is a sin but getting good news in the home can help. Try PMA.
• India
14 Dec 10
Well, a child definitely learns first from his parents. That's why he imitates things he sees. There are some basic values in life that would/ should be taught by the parents. And because the child's brain is so fresh and ready to learn anything he sees or hears, the values he learns would be engraved in him. So, yeah to a certain limit, ONLY TO A CERTAIN LIMIT, parents are responsible for their child's actions. It would also depend on the child's age before you start judging. It is much easier to teach children good values when they are young. 'Cause then, they are very young and innocent, they would consider their parents to be the best people in their world and they would listen to what the parents say. As the child starts understanding how things work around him, he might pull out tricks from his sleeve, depending on how good/ bad his parents/ society treat him. There's still a limit to what parents can be blamed for. And do consider the child's age when you start judging their actions.