Taking People for Granted
By terryt52
@terryt52 (243)
United States
February 17, 2011 8:56am CST
Next month my husband will be married for 34 years. I have two grown sons and two adopted little girls whom are still home with us. We have done foster care and taken care of sick relatives till the end. All has been very gratifying. In the thirty four years that we have been married we have never been with just our family. We are always helping some one and giving them a place to live and a fresh start in life. I love trying to help people go on the right path in life to give them a chance. I have a foster daughter who has been with me 7 years. She comes and goes. She has been back with me for a year with her son. She lives off entitlements. She gets up around 9 am with her son whom is three, she goes back upstairs and lays him and her in the bed all day. I have a ten room house 2 bathroom house. I clean the entire house, work every day, cook, laundry and take care of my two special needs girls. I am getting so aggravated at no motivation. Her attitude is like the whole owes her everything. I am totally amazed at the situation. I have had many conversations and some arguments over this entire situation. I want her out but I do not want the baby to suffer. Help
1 person likes this
5 responses
@cream97 (29087)
• United States
17 Feb 11
Hi. terryt52. I think that your foster daughter should get up and find a job. I am assuming that she is old enough to work. She should show you more respect than she does. You should contact the person that is in charge of her case. Don't let her walk all over you in your own home. Put your foot down and let her know that if she wants to continue living in your home, she has to learn how to respect you. It could be much worse for her somewhere else, I hope that she is aware of that.
@terryt52 (243)
• United States
17 Feb 11
Thank you for your response and yes she is twenty three years and I have said to her the same exact thing you wrote. She tells me I am old fashion and the world is not like it use to be. No one is in charge of her so it is up to me to just suck it up and do tough love. I have never in my life seen a person who does what she does at 23 years old and it does effect her child. I could go on and on about her behavior but I am so ready to give up.
@sudiptacallingu (10879)
• India
18 Feb 11
I really gave this a big thought and I still think you need to stop this nonsense right away... and for that, you’ll have to harden your heart with regard to the baby. As it is, she is doing a lousy job of bringing up her son, its best if it doesn’t happen in front of your eyes with you as a mute spectator. Since you’ve already had several talks and tiffs with her, no point in talking about it. Just give her an ultimatum with a time frame... maybe two or six months within which she has to search a job for herself... she just cant live off you like this. Also, the child has to be admitted to school immediately... if she cant, then she’ll just have to go. You have lots of other responsibilities which are more genuine than this girl... you cant fail others just cause you’re upset the whole day with a lazy selfish girl.
@rameshchow (4426)
• India
18 Feb 11
friend, new cultures are really different to new one like me.
Day by day, i m really shocking when i am reading some problems.
In india divorce is a beeeeeeg process, it is a sensational issue. But you are simply saying that my husband will be married...., I mean "how far is it correct to leave the children alone, it will definitely effects on their career heavy badly".
@lexirose7350 (459)
• Philippines
18 Feb 11
Your foster daughter is old enough to work and give her son a decent life.You will not forever be there to support her and her son. Have you tried counseling?
