accepting friends' request on facebook

@allknowing (130064)
India
April 13, 2011 10:35pm CST
I have this close relation of mine who never interacts in real life - no emails, no phone calls, no visits, no nothing but wants to be friends on Facebook. I find this pretty odd. What's your take on this?
1 person likes this
14 responses
@dpk262006 (58675)
• Delhi, India
14 Apr 11
Hello allknowing! It is your choice and your call finally. If you do not feel comfortable adding him/her or further interacting with him/her on Facebook, you can choose to ignore him/her. Had I been in your place, I would have accepted the request because if the fellow does not behave himself/herself, I have every right to delete him/her from my list.
@allknowing (130064)
• India
14 Apr 11
This particular individual has not been in touch with me for ages. She can easily call up, send me emails and even spend a holiday with me but instead she is in the process of converting a real relationship into a virtual one. I do have many relatives on facebook who keep in touch with me as would one in the real world. The question is whether I should encourage this or wait for her to start a face to face relationship followed by Facebook. Facebook has advantages in that we get to know the activities of our friends at one go.
@dpk262006 (58675)
• Delhi, India
14 Apr 11
Let the reverse happen, add her first on FB and check out her details etc. then go for real life relationship. You may think over and give it a try. (it is only my personal suggestion).
@allknowing (130064)
• India
16 Apr 11
I have quite a number of relatives on facebook but they are in my life in real life too. This individual merely wants a virtual relationship which I dont' want to encourage. This trend is fast becoming a way of life.
• Philippines
14 Apr 11
Yes you are right, pretty odd but I find nothing wrong with the gesture. If he/she's more comfortable interacting on social networking site then let him/her be.Give him/her the benefit of the doubt.
@allknowing (130064)
• India
14 Apr 11
There is a world of a different between interacting in the real world and in a virtual world. People seek virtual friends and try to convert them into real friendship. But converting a real relationship into a virtual one is indeed disturbing.
@allknowing (130064)
• India
14 Apr 11
Please read as 'world of a difference'
• Philippines
14 Apr 11
Just keep your heart and mind open to possibilities that it may in some ways start a real relationship with the whole family and not a virtual one.
@KrauseHome (36448)
• United States
19 Apr 11
Personally I would find this a little odd as well. If they are not wanting to have any doings with you in person, and only on Facebook are they just trying to keep tabs on you so they can know how you are doing, or so that they can then judge everything and talk about you with others? This would truly bother me if it were me, and I would have to find myself confronting the other person and asking why only there do they want to keep in contact then?
@allknowing (130064)
• India
20 Apr 11
I have not accepted the friend's request as I too feel that there should first be a contact in the real world being a close relative.
@felelis (96)
• Thailand
14 Apr 11
I do agree that it is weird, I totally understand you! Someone add me even if they don't even know me, someone never talk to me even once. But even if they never talk to me but if they respond on my wall or do comments, it is still somewhat reasonable to add me as friends. But many of them add me and they don't even once, comments or like things I post, never post on my wall. So for that kind of people I delete them from my friend list. And still they sent friend request to me again. - -"
@allknowing (130064)
• India
16 Apr 11
This person is a close relative of mine who has not responded to emails nor does she phone. And now she wants me to add as a friend which I feel is not the way to get back into someone's life who is closely related.
• Canada
14 Apr 11
Most of my friend requests are just ike that. They add me, we have no friends in common, then they never say anything, leave a comment, or talk on chat. I don't know why they bother adding me.
@allknowing (130064)
• India
16 Apr 11
They want to have a peek into other people's activities. That's why
@sajeevking (5073)
• Mumbai, India
16 Apr 11
i accept every friends request i get on facebook and they turn out to be a scammer then i remove them maybe he/she like to just be friends on facebook and the only way to know it would be to accept him/her and find out its feel odd if some one in our relative to whom we have never talk but know them want to be a friends on fb but i don't see any awkwardness in accept their request
@allknowing (130064)
• India
16 Apr 11
I would have been happier if she replied to my emails or occasionaly phoned me.
@dreamy1 (3811)
• United States
14 Apr 11
I have relatives like that who are friends on FB. I don't have a lot of friends because I only accept requests from people I know in real life and relatives. I don't even communicate on FB with those said relatives but they are still there. I only accepted them because they are family even though I don't speak much to them in real life.
@allknowing (130064)
• India
14 Apr 11
This trend bothers me. What used to be a close knit family relationship has now turned into a virtual relationship. If one can seek friendship on Facebook why not in the real world?
@joystick (1675)
14 Apr 11
I tend not to add people on face book that do not bother with me, or people that i can not be bothered with.I find it alot easier to have friends that i see as well as that they are like me.I do not bother that much with facebook, but when i do i tend to see people that are trying to add me all the time.
@allknowing (130064)
• India
16 Apr 11
I agree with you. Those relatives who do not keep in touch in the real world need to be kept at bay.
@chicko (86)
• India
14 Apr 11
Maybe this relative wants to keep a watch on you... Or just increase his/her friends list!! Depending on how their reputation is, you could decide whether to accept or not.. If you know this relative as a gossiper or backbiter or with a big mouth, just avoid the friend request. But if this person is sweet or nice person, you could add, maybe just limited profile..
@allknowing (130064)
• India
16 Apr 11
What I feel is she wants to know what is going on in people's lives without having to take the trouble of keeping in touch with them personally and I am not going to give her that pleasure!
• Philippines
14 Apr 11
hello allknowing, I don't easily accept FR in any social networking especially on facebook for a personal and security reasons if there is no info, photos but he/she left a message saying who is she/he maybe i can accept it but still it depends. If you think that this will be the start of having communication why not but still you must know what is the real reasons why he/she want to be on your fb list happy mylotting
@allknowing (130064)
• India
14 Apr 11
This is a close relative who has not interacted in the real world. I find it odd to have only a virtual relationship with a close relative. I would any day prefer to have real contact. She does not even reply to emails!!
@QeeGood (1213)
• Sweden
14 Apr 11
I think every one is free to choose how you want to interact with people in your life. To only have friends on Facebook, can be a beginning to learn to interact with people. Perhaps the person needs to take it step by step to come back to life for a particular reason.
@allknowing (130064)
• India
16 Apr 11
I would have preferred if she called up or sent an email to get back into a relationship.
@ajk111 (2495)
14 Apr 11
I find this typical of FB. Some friends on facebook have thousands of friends. no one has thousands of friends in reality. i find FB so far removed from reality as it is possible to go. I live on a small island and people that live on the island have friends on FB that also live on the island that they would walk by in the street with out any form of acknowledgement. On the plus side FB does do a lot to heighten awareness of important issues that a lot of people would otherwise be unaware of.
@allknowing (130064)
• India
14 Apr 11
Facebook does update people on issues that interest them and I have already experienced it. I have managed to get back lost friends - friends of yesteryears, such as classmates, office colleagues, and so on.I even got my boss! Here Facebook plays a big role. But the tendency to opt for a virtual world rather than go through the 'hassle' of the real world is something that needs to be looked at with all seriousness. A day will come when we will see real faces only at functions and celebrations!
@neenie (343)
• United States
14 Apr 11
Some people just find it easier to communicate over the internet. That's why things like facebook and text messages are so popular. It's much easier to say something (especially if they are being rude or something) when you are not in person. We have become so used to dealing with friends and family is this way that this has become our primary form of communication. It's not really a good thing though. It's very awkard to only talk to someone online and then see them in person. I don't know, maybe you're relative just wants to be closer to you.
@allknowing (130064)
• India
16 Apr 11
Facebook and other social networking sites are converting real friends into virtual ones which needs to be curbed. If encouraged we will only be left with virtual relatinships!
• Philippines
14 Apr 11
i reserve my right to only approve FR in FB for those people i personally know. even if they're considered long-lost friend already. ;-) as we know people or "freinds" in facebook get notified with the changes we make in our profile. as much as possible i only want people i know and not those strangers who just keeps inviting or sending friend request.
@allknowing (130064)
• India
16 Apr 11
I too do not accept friends who are strangers to me. In the family I only accept those who are also in my real world.