Why am I feeling this?

@onque10 (110)
Philippines
July 11, 2011 9:23am CST
I was feeling stressed and depressed lately. The reason behind it is still unknown to me. Two weeks ago, my colleague took a long sick leave, for she has to undergo operation. I was delegated to take some of her tasks. These past few days, my friend and my long-time crush are getting inclined with each other. It was my friend who took the first move actually. She sent an email to the guy and since then, they started exchanging emails and SMS'. It was me who introduced the guy to my friend. It never entered my mind that the guy would spent such time with my friend because I thought that his standards are high. I can really say that my friend is not an ideal girl (standard which is known to me). She is really not so smart. I don't know if guys today really into such qualification. But since the guy really is a good looking, I believed that he would not take an interest with my friend. But to my dismay (I think I really like the guy), they become friends and sometimes my friend would tell me their conversations. To cut the story short, they seem to developed feelings to each other and sometimes it made me jealous. But sometimes too, it made me care not. Last Friday, the guy asked my friend if she would like to ride with him going home. My friend begged me to go with them, of course I said no but the guy also begged me. I sit at the back while I asked my friend to sit beside the guy. Then most of the conversation was between me and the guy since we talked more about our company and our works since previously, we would directly coordinating. He took us to a dinner and after that, my friend and I took our way back home. The reason I am telling this is for you guys to help me understand and identify the reason why lately, I am feeling so depressed and I find myself having a hard time breathing. Is it because of the workload or because of the jealousy I am feeling towards my friend?
1 person likes this
1 response
@SomeCowgirl (32270)
• United States
11 Jul 11
I think that it is a combination of the two. It sounds to me as if you are over stressed and you are also feeling jealous of what is going on between your friend and your crush. It seems to me that you got them together thinking that it'd appease your friend but that your crush wouldn't take to her and that would be that. Now that you see them together you're feelings for your crush are coming more towards the surface but you're confused as to what to truly feel and think about the situation. Its sounds like to me that you need to take a few minutes to yourself and think about your feelings and the situation. Think about what happened that day and the conversation that was bad, think about when your heart twinged with jealousy and your stomach jumped with upset, then assess from ther further, was it jealousy, was it insecurity, was it happiness? Good Luck but you definitely need to figure something out and it'd be best to tell your friend too.
@onque10 (110)
• Philippines
12 Jul 11
Do you really think so? Well, I also thought that these two incidents really the reason why I feel so depressed right now. But I don't want to admit that I am jealous since I don't really like the guy. It was like that I found him easy to mingle with. But another thing is, whenever my friend starts to tell stories about him, I found myself getting annoyed. I consider this irrelevant but still, I can't help myself to think the reason why I feel such way. Oh men, I really confused.