My bestfriend didn't invite me to her wedding.

@jonahh08 (261)
Philippines
July 25, 2011 9:55am CST
I was really hurt and heartbroken when my best friend didn't invite me to her wedding. It all started few years back when she introduced me to his boyfriend (now husband) Mark. He made some remarks on how pretty I am (modesty aside..lol)and since then she has changed. It's like she became a stranger. She made sure that there will be no more encounter between me and his boyfriend. The wedding was already a year ago but I can't seem to forget what she's done. I love her, she was my best friend for 10 years and I just couldn't accept the fact that she didn't seem to value our friendship.
6 people like this
43 responses
@jdex_143 (1094)
• Philippines
26 Jul 11
Whew! I'm sorry to know that your best friend neglected you at her wedding day.. She must be very jealous of you. Perhaps, she thinks that you could take away her boyfriend from her. I think, what she did was wrong. She should have trusted you because you're her best friend for years. And you won't take away his boyfriend, right? She should have invited you despite of her jealousy on you. Anyway, they're married already. Jealousy is not a point already. :) Maybe, you should talk to her about what you felt when she didn't invite you to her special day. I hope you could make things well like it used to be between the two of you. :)
1 person likes this
@samafayla33 (1857)
• United States
25 Jul 11
I am so sorry, I know that you are like sisters because that's how best friends are. The fact that she didn't invite you to her wedding perhaps brings up a lot of her questions, did you ask her why?
@jonahh08 (261)
• Philippines
25 Jul 11
I did. I remember I was crying when I asked her why, and all she could say was "sorry". Honestly up until now whenever I think about I get so confused. I mean, there's gotta be something. But I guess it will always be a mystery.
@jaiho2009 (36773)
• Philippines
25 Jul 11
She's pretty jealous of you then,that even on the day she gets married she did not invited you. (will her groom backed our when he sees you dazzling than the bride eh?) Forget her,she's not worth for a friend to cherish. If she did not value the years that you together have shared,why the need to be of sorrow till now? I am sure she will not give you any chance to see her and her husband...so moved on. I know it's not easy,but you have...there are good friends with you,that worth your love and company. welcome to mylot
1 person likes this
@jonahh08 (261)
• Philippines
25 Jul 11
Thanks jaiho. I'll remember that.
• United States
25 Jul 11
This is sad to hear. Best friends usually want their friend at their wedding. I wonder why she felt this way? It was a year ago and wonder how your and her friendship is holding after the marriage? It could be an insecurity factor of hers, but is this fair on your and her friendship though?
1 person likes this
@jonahh08 (261)
• Philippines
25 Jul 11
We're not that close anymore. I don't even know if we're still friends or not. But it's ok, life goes on. We don't see each other anymore. The last text that I received from her was 5 months ago.
@koperty3 (1878)
25 Jul 11
If she did not invite you so it means that she wasn't your truly friend. I would like to share this special day like wedding with people I love: my family and friends. Of course I would not invite a stranger so sorry to say this but she treated you as stranger. Don't be heart broken. Life go forward. You have better things to do than thinking about ungrateful people.
1 person likes this
@jonahh08 (261)
• Philippines
25 Jul 11
Yes koperty3, you are very right. In my heart I already forgave her. But everything will never be the same again between the two of us.
• Philippines
25 Jul 11
Maybe she was really jealous over her husband's remark on you. But you said she's your best friend. She should've understood that you weren't there to ruin their relationship. But even so, it may be still hard for your best friend to accept the fact that her husband thinks you're pretty. It's just a "trusting" issue.
@jonahh08 (261)
• Philippines
25 Jul 11
Yeah you're right. Maybe she just love the guy so much to the point that she got paranoid.
@18saurab (89)
• India
25 Jul 11
Yes you are right she has forgotten how to deal with good friends.
1 person likes this
@jonahh08 (261)
• Philippines
25 Jul 11
Yeah and that hurts a lot.
@rameshchow (5286)
• India
25 Jul 11
Marriage can change ones life. Marriage can change their thoughts. Your friend is now thinking only about her hubby. It is better to keep away from her.
• Malaysia
25 Jul 11
Hi, ive come across this kind of happening. Yes, the least she could do is to invite you but if she didnt its like she is telling you indirectly that the friendship is over. There is sometimes friends just dont know their limit when talking to friends partner, they just rub it in when compliments were given. And what kind of husband/boyfriend/girlfriend to compliment others infront of their love one when it can be said discreetly. You a good friend and love her forgive her shortcoming cause she believes that her marriage is way more important to secure or maybe sometimes the husband compliment infront of you but the truth is he was the one who said "Dont invite you for the wedding"...
1 person likes this
• Philippines
25 Jul 11
Regardless of how much pain you have, I am convinced that what your bestfriend did was beneficial to both to you.
@CTHanum (8255)
• Malaysia
26 Jul 11
You should make it clear jonah. Ask her why she is away from you. Maybe she did not noticed and forgot to invite you on her wedding day. If you just keep it like that you will only start assuming things like this. You should ask her and perhaps all your questions and assumptions answered.
@jonahh08 (261)
• Philippines
26 Jul 11
I already asked but she gave no answers.
1 person likes this
@CTHanum (8255)
• Malaysia
27 Jul 11
Then, that is her fault. If she meant to get away from you forever then you need to accept that. But as her friend I think you can continue be like her friend. Like me I have such friends too. I give them message and try to contact them but they refused to answer me. I know that is my fault and I ask for apology and they did not answer anything. Okay, it is up to them but I will never forget the friendship so I still do what friends do. Still send messages when there are special events and if they still ignore it I can't help it.
@celticeagle (75791)
• Boise, Idaho
25 Jul 11
We go through life caring for friends and family. But how do we really know how they are feeling toward us? I think this gal is jealous and that is sad. She might even have other feelings about you that you are not aware of. I would be glad to have found out when you did. It could have been alot worse. Too bad. Do you really feel that you were her best friend for ten years or where you just hers?
@jonahh08 (261)
• Philippines
25 Jul 11
We're like sisters. She once told me that I was God's gift to her because she has no sister only two brothers. We're inseparable only until she met the guy. (Oh my God, my tears are falling. Oh, the memories)
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (75791)
• Boise, Idaho
25 Jul 11
That is sad. She really must have a complex. So insecure she will give up her best friend for her man. That's kind of friend I want. NOT!
@aeiou78 (3458)
• Malaysia
31 Jul 11
ha! ha! I guessed she was worrying you to take away her husband. Anyhow, you should be proud of yourselves because of your good attraction and beautiful figure. For me, I shall be glad too because of saving some money as a gift for the wedding. From now, you should realize that our lovers are more importance than friendships when we are very good with our the other half. When there is an quarreling in between a couple, then only the they will think about their good friends around them.
@jonahh08 (261)
• Philippines
8 Aug 11
Thanks. That gift part was funny and you're right! I pitty her bec she has a small heart Lol, it's like she's limited to loving only a few people. Or maybe, she didnt love me at all.
@salonga (24464)
• Philippines
27 Jul 11
Wedding photo - Signing of marriage contract
I would like to believe you are prettier than the actress in your Avatar so your best friend felt very insecure when her boyfriend noticed your beauty. {Oh dear, you should let all of us see that beauty that killed a friendship in your Avatar, ha!ha!ha!) Anyway, kidding aside I advice you to get over that sad experience. You should rather be happy because you have discovered how shallow-minded that supposedly best friend of yours. Don't you regret losing the good friendship between you and her. There are other worthy friends around and I'm sure they will invite you in their wedding the once it is their turn. Okay! I hope you are my friend so I could have invited you in my wedding.
@jonahh08 (261)
• Philippines
27 Jul 11
Hey salonga, that really made me smile. And yeah I'll follow your advice. Thank you.
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
26 Jul 11
did you know when she got married? or you knew when and where she got married ? My bestfriend didnt knew also when I got married and you reminded me of her. At the right time I went and told her why I wasnt able to let her know. I explained what happened and she understood. I am lucky with my bestfriend. Just give yours a time and im sure she'll soon explain to you why or might as well talk to her.
@jonahh08 (261)
• Philippines
26 Jul 11
I found out about the wedding a week after. She didn't offer any reasons. She just said sorry. I mean, what does "sorry" means.
@wongchoiyee (4856)
• Malaysia
25 Jul 11
What will you going to do? What done is done. Forget about her. Find some true friends here. Anyway I not going to treat you like that. Love ya!
@jonahh08 (261)
• Philippines
25 Jul 11
Wow. That made me smile :) Thank you wongchoiyee, I'm beginning to really love it here in mylot.
• India
25 Jul 11
I think she is not as beautiful as you are. So she may be having some complex and has become extra cautious. Since she does not trust that you would not steal her boyfriend, I an inclined to conclude that the friendship between you two might be long but it was not strong, at least from her point of view. So don't feel hurt. Many times in your life that in any relationship, the intensity is not same from the either side. You may trust one but he/she may not trust you. Somebody may be loving you deeply but you may be having little affection for that person. Things like these keep on happening all through our life. So somebody may be our best friend but he/she may not be considering us his/her best friend. One need not feel too bad about it.
@jonahh08 (261)
• Philippines
25 Jul 11
That makes a lot of sense Cactus. Thanks.
@anurag3786 (6275)
• India
25 Jul 11
Now the truth is that she married to another guy and forgets you. But I don’t understand how it happens. Because as you say that she was your best friend from last 10 years then how can it possible that she doesn’t invite you on her marriage. I think their can be some matter between both of you. But now she forgets you and don’t want to friendship with you. I am really sorry for this. Because I feel that she cheated you.
@jonahh08 (261)
• Philippines
25 Jul 11
She started to act different just after the incident that's why I know it's because of that. I already accept the fact that she love the guy MORE than she have ever loved me. :(
@secretbear (19476)
• Philippines
28 Jul 11
Hi jonahh! She got jealous of you! More like she got threatened by you. ^^ It's understandable why she behaved like that since her boyfriend complimented you and must probably liked you on the spot. She probably love her boyfriend and now husband, that much that's why she would do anything to keep him for herself even it meant losing her bestfriend. My bestfriend got married without me knowing anything. Well, before her wedding, we had some misunderstanding. But I didn't think it would stop her from telling me that she's getting married. It was a petty misunderstanding about money (but the amount involved was big) and I never thought it would make us grow far apart. I didn't know of her marriage until one of my friends told me. I was really hurt and since then, we never became best of friends anymore. We're still friends I think, but it's not just the way it used to be.
@tod266 (86)
• Thailand
27 Jul 11
sorry to hear that :( .. hope you can forgive her and you both will be happy with good friendship again..