How do I resolve problems with husbands who do not want to communicate?

Indonesia
September 7, 2011 5:22am CST
My husband and I have different ways of communication from the beginning. I was more expressive and are always trying to express my feelings. While the husband does not talk much and start a conversation. If there is a problem between us, I prefer to discuss it with the intention to finish quickly, while the husband chooses to remain silent and avoid. There was never any words to solve or the solution. If I am taking the initiative to talk, he could have been even more angry, not to speak any longer. And if it were so, I became more emotional and more talk. so, How will we resolve the issues between us?
3 people like this
6 responses
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
1 Oct 11
Hi there! That's also my problem with my husband before and that really makes me mad. Most of the time I want to talk to things out right away and resolve whatever problem or misunderstanding that we have, but my husband? he always choose to shut his mouth and ignore me, and the result? We don't talk for a day or two! huh! What I do during those time is try to ignore him as well even if my heart is bursting, and I just don't cook for him! haha I made him hungry! lol! So its like having a hunger strike in our house. Anyway, I think if you notice that he don't like talking, then give him space, give him time to think and when the situation is cooler, then I guess that would be a good time to talk things out. I also write my feelings down, and give him a letter so that he knows what I am feeling and thinking. I'm thankful that little by little things are changing for the better between me and my husband. What I just don't know if its me who have changed or him who changed...
@moakamsg (114)
5 Jan 12
Hello, When me and my husband are having issues and I get no response from him and I'm upset..I don't cook either! haha... he hates it. I hate doing it but sometimes you have to prove a point. I agree with giving him his space and writing letters that helps.
@moakamsg (114)
5 Jan 12
I go through the same exact issues with my husband and I thought I was the only one. I constantly tell him communication is the key in marriage. Just like you I am the one always initiating the conversation and all he does it sit there or I get a very short response. All in all I just think he has issues with expressing his feelings (most men do) which I understand but its very frustrating! Sometimes I feel like I'm talking to myself...because I don't get much feedback. But I would recommend maybe marriage counseling..that is our next step.
• India
24 Sep 11
i think your husband have some problem with you and he do not want to solve. I think his nature is quite and clam he do not like to dicussion the thing but you start talking to him. If he do not talk then to to talk to him talk any thing about the day you have spend the problem which you have face. Either ask any question then too he do not answer you then write a letter and keep in such a place were he will find it. See do this and do tell it works or not is yes the it ok and if no then shall give you more tips but do tell me!!!
@nakula2009 (2325)
• Indonesia
24 Sep 11
from the standpoint of a husband, a problem exists that must be resolved and there who should be ignored! in my opinion ... if the husband does not want to talk about who she think it is a problem, for the husband was not a big deal who does not need to be addressed. or maybe the husband realized that if taken would be longer his business!
@gengeni (3308)
• Indonesia
24 Sep 11
There are many ways to solve the problem, one with a discussion. But the most telling and safe is mutual understanding and couples understand the advantages and disadvantages. If there is a pattern to the spouse's forced rather than solve the problem instead adding new problems. regards
• Indonesia
7 Sep 11
By mail only, try to be explained in writing. although the mouth does not speak, but the eye can read and the heart can be temperamental. hopefully your husband is willing to speak as well without emotion