when you love, you end up hurting

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I wonder how most of the times, the person who loves the most, still ends up hurting the most. I do not want to be cynical about love, but when you see how often people around you being hurt just because they fall of the expectations of the people they love, they end up being alone. Or sometimes, they are in a very difficult situation like loving someone who already has another, and no matter how many times they knock their heads off in order to be awaken from the stupidity of trying to make someone love them too, they still go in circles waiting for that somebody to value them. If you are in any of that situation, how are you going to deal with it? but please try to be in the shoes of the person when you try to give a response...thanks