Giving Love a Second Chance

December 5, 2011 12:38am CST
What would you do when your supposed ex-boyfriend would one day pop up through Facebook and is very remorseful of what he had done, the reason why the relationship went sour for more than a year. He has been asking for forgiveness of what he has done and on my part, to forgive is divine. I still love him though I am hesitant on how my family would react when they thought I have already forgotten him.We had a seven year relationship, supposedly eight if he had not gone wayward.
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9 responses
@SIMPLYD (82913)
• Philippines
5 Dec 11
So, why would it be at FB that he will do that remorseful thing. Can he not go to your place and personally relay it to you. At least if it's done in person, you can gauge if he is sincere about it. And if he really is, then why not give him a second chance? Everybody deserves a second chance, my friend.
6 Dec 11
He found me or it was me who found him in Facebook.He works overseas and he just drifted away from the relationship to which I didn't mind because I knew deep inside, he would come back to me.I have already conditioned myself that if he is the man truly meant for me, no matter what happens, he would really find some ways to reach me.Indeed,he did it;)
@capirani (1841)
• United States
6 Dec 11
You said he works overseas. Does this mean you have never met in person or have you? If you have never met in person, there is a big chance he isn't even the person he claims to be. I would be more interested in knowing more about your previous relationship, how you met, etc, and if you ever knew each other face to face, or has it only been online. Even if you have had an in person, face to face relationship in the past, knowing he is overseas apart from you, it would be easy for him to play romantic games online and not really be serious. How can you know online if he is serious about wanting to be back in a relationship with you? And after such a long time apart after having such a long relationship in the first place, how do you know he would not do this all over again? I think for myself, I would have to wait until we could speak face to face for extended time before deciding anything. It takes body language as well as words to make a true conversation and you just cannot get that online.
@SIMPLYD (82913)
• Philippines
7 Dec 11
That's what i am telling airamtheb. She has to meet him again in person, and let him profess his love in person. That way, she can determine if there is sincerity in what he claims .
• India
5 Dec 11
I would listen to what he has to say and then I would tell my parents about this. I would discuss it with them and see their reaction to it. If they would ask me if I still love him, I'd say yes and if they would not have any problem with it i'll not only forgive that boy but will also give him a second chance. In case my parents would not want me to be with him anymore I may just forgive him and tell him that that past relation is a past relation and we must move on (though i'd secretly keep loving him in my heart).
6 Dec 11
It is not only my parents whom I am considering but as well as my sisters who have been close to him before.yes, i am slowly opening the topic about him to them.As to my mother, she seems to be indifferent at first, probably because she was also hurt of what had happen to our relationship because she is also close with him.My sisters are open minded and I could feel that they are also excited on what will happen next...though until now I haven't told them yet that the guy is coming back and we are about to settle everything soon...
• India
7 Dec 11
In such a situation it is very obvious for the parents to be indifferent at first because they are worried about us and don't want us to get hurt again. Actually trust once lost is not easily retrievable. As you said your sisters are already excited, I am sure they'll be happy when they'll get to know about you both coming together again, so it's great. Don't worry about your Mom, give her some time she will soon accept him again. Wish you good luck dear!
8 Dec 11
Thank you very much Inderjeetkaur. You have given me the courage to go on.God Bless you;)
7 Dec 11
"you should allow to your boyfriend for going if he return to you,he will belong to you forever if he doesn't return to you,he never belonged to you" this expression is popular in Turkiye and i believe it is true.Your boyfriend returned to you because he belongs to you :)
8 Dec 11
Your message mervealtug is very inspiring...I hope and pray that the Turkiye expression will also hold TRUE in my lovelife. Thank you very much.
@thatgirl13 (7307)
• South Korea
5 Dec 11
Omg 7 years is a long time and I think you guys had something good together and that is why you guys were together for so long. I think if i were you, I would give the relationship a shot again, that is if I still have some feelings for him. If I have moved on for good though, I wouldn't bother.
6 Dec 11
You are right, its quite a long time for anyone who is into a BF-GF relationship though I have considered it a test of faith and trust for both of us.He was the one who had broken the trust though we have not yet talk in person, hopefully this weekend when he will be home from abroad. I admit, I still love him because if I haven't, I could have another boyfriend by now, or could have even gotten married with another guy.....Love is patient, Love is kind....
@ebuscat (5949)
• Philippines
5 Dec 11
For me if you love him fight for that love so that your sacrifice is worthy because you choose the one you love me in my husband we are in the stage of one month break up then after we are together then it is second change so keep up the good work.
6 Dec 11
Thank you ebuscat...You have taught me to fight for my love, then i have to do it and please help me pray it would not be too late for me to do it.Hoping too,we'll be like you and your husband...to get married soon;))
• Philippines
5 Dec 11
well mine had never have a second chance may be because the reason is too much to forgive him just like that. i think that the first thing that you should consider is the reason of the break up, then if you have still have feelings after those years or what ever (how long). then it's where you can start or just definitely put an end of everything. the reason that i have a break up with that boyfriend is that he cheated and that's it. the issue is the trust, in my situation he broke that trust and i know that i can't trust him ever again. and that is one main reason that even if he kneel down in front a mall, in one of the most busiest places on earth still he is not getting it... even if he put me in a spot where people are looking at us its just that i just want to be honest for him even though he was not that honest in our relationship. i said good bye and he will thank me...
6 Dec 11
It is different when you truly love someone, much more when you are into a long time relationship because you can't just throw him out from your thoughts.His pleadings to be forgiven have kept ringing in my head...and who am I not to forgive the one whom I've truly love...
@mensab (4207)
• Philippines
5 Dec 11
if you are having second thoughts, then it is better to talk it out with your trusted friend or relative. it is wise not to decide immediately without conferring with a confidante. i know it is hard to give up on those years of being with the person, but this is a chance that will define your relationship with him if ever you decide to have him back. i wish you the best.
6 Dec 11
Well said mensab.Unfortunately, a good friend who is my confidante had already blocked what i'm about to say regarding my relationship with my ex-boyfriend.She is just over protective of me because she knows how hurt I was when my boyfriend faded away. I cant blame her for that, plus the fact that she no longer trust men out from her personal experiences too when she was dumped by her ex-boyfriend over a dumb girl. Thank you for your wishes...hope, i could have the best one soon.
@nezavisima (7417)
• Bulgaria
5 Dec 11
giving love a second chance I think everyone deserves this second chance. If you love someone you do anything about it and it is normal to give him a second chance. However, if you have true feelings worth. any remorse for old mistakes and it hurts a lot. so I think it does give a second chance it will become clear if you truly love or not. success. nice day!
6 Dec 11
Thanks a lot. Your suggestion is deeply noted. Love always give second chances and I hope I can do it too;)
• Philippines
12 Dec 11
Love is sweet, its about forgiving and sharing. If you truly love him still why not give him another chance. He might have discovered that you mean more than anything to him. I'm telling you, love is sweeter but it would be sweetest if you will forgive him and move on. I know you still love him. Perhaps it is your pride messing you up this time.