An (ex) husband brings his new lover to his ex-wife, a great show of disrespect

Malaysia
December 25, 2011 11:19pm CST
I know of a woman,M, whose husband left her and her nine children and later her husband remarried for a second time and had five children with his 'second' wife. M did not officially divorce her husband (because of religion) and the couple now live as separated spouses. Later, M's husband came to visit her, bringing with him his second wife. Of course, M was very enraged and chased her husband and his second wife out of the house. That happened more than 10 years ago and now M's children are all grown up and doing quite well in their life. M worked hard to support and bring up her children by herself. M's husband continued visiting her home, once or twice a year, expecting some pampering and money from his older children. Recently, M's husband came by and he brought his second and now, old wife, new children and grandchildren. M was of course hurt, her children were also furious and one of the daughters, scolded the father and a few minutes later the 'new family' left their home. The children agree that their father had crossed the line when he brought his second wife to their home, humiliating and showing great disrespect to their mum. And all this happened on Christmas Eve. What are your opinions mylotters?
4 people like this
8 responses
@Triple0 (1907)
• Australia
26 Dec 11
Now that's just plain rude and cruel! Does this husband know what on earth he is doing, doesn't his "second" wife realize that she shouldn't even bother showing her face the M? Why are some people so clueless, the husband didn't even learn the first time, it's better to not show up at all to offer some peace and quiet to the poor family. I can't believe M had the ability to raise 9 children all on her own! That's very amazing! She's super woman! Just shows that women can take care of themselves, who needs a man!? But really, why have a reunion? It's just going to arise bitterness and anger, no one wants to see their ex partner show off their new wife. That happened in my cousins family. My cousin's dad went to Vietnam for a vacation on his own and one day brought home a younger wife with two kids. He announced that he wanted to get married! My cousins was furious and fights with his Dad but his Mum just simply accepted it. She even let that younger woman into her house and attended their wedding! My cousin probably doesn't talk to his dad anymore.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
26 Dec 11
It is downright rude! I think it is also selfish and arrogant. After hurting his first wife and children, he still has the nerve to ask for some money from them.
2 people like this
• India
26 Dec 11
Triple0, this husband needs some portyal from you, he deserves some serious writing on him. which describes exacly how he has, and the story must depicts some serious nod of literature. then mr. husband takes chapter from that writing.
@Triple0 (1907)
• Australia
27 Dec 11
Some people don't learn and they stay immature. I know people who don't learn and are so oblivious to serious aspects in life. I just can't believe the husband and his new family have no idea what burden they causing.
1 person likes this
@Trensue (5256)
• United States
26 Dec 11
It is just very sad. I can't imagine living that way. I think God would understand a divorce. What kind of God expects a woman to live like that? I am thankful I don't have to face a choice between my religion and my well being.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
27 Dec 11
It's a cross that M has to carry and that cross has bore many fruits. Financially, she is fine now and also all her children, but her husband is poor and so do his new children. So, M's husband and his new children always come to visit, ask to be acknowledged but more importantly, they 'smell' the money!
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
26 Dec 11
There is such a thing as tact and diplomacy. It does not show the greatest amount of either to flaunt your new conquest into the face of the former one. If it is something that is necessary and unavoidable and circumstances call for the meeting that can be a different situation all together.
• Malaysia
27 Dec 11
I guess it is necessary for the father to keep in touch with his children, at least, but is it necessary to remind them of his second wife and new children?
@allknowing (65253)
• India
26 Dec 11
Any one who visits me, friends, family or whoever does so with prior appointment and this is common everywhere. It is surprising therefore that this man walks in without announcement. I find this pretty odd in the first place and having said that why should this Ms M open the door?
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
27 Dec 11
I am afraid the culture where M lives with your culture is not the same. Although M is hurt by her husband, she gets along well with her husband's family and relatives, most of them I think. Also, there's some family connection between them. So, it's a bit complicated. M is actually a very fierce woman but funny, her husband doesn't even bother.
• Philippines
26 Dec 11
The man/husband clearly have no idea that some things should not be crossed. If I were the first wife or one of his children, the phrase "What was he thinking' would be running across my mind for several minutes. I don't exactly kno0w why he would let the two women and his two families meet when he knows that there are strained toes between all of them (the father/husband the fist family and the second family). I also don't know what his second wife and family are thinking, are they trying to impress the first family? It's sad that this happened on Christmas Eve. The father/husband should have known better. Instead, he comes off as a unfeeling and insensitive man. I know that Christmas is a time for family and forgiveness but technically, he wasn't really part of his former family for many years and due to his new wife and new children, he basically has another life. He should have left it at that and didn't try to antagonize himself.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
26 Dec 11
I, too am wondering what that old man is thinking, why he's so insensitive and so ignorant of his first wife's and children's feeling. He deserved the scolding from his daughter. Despite M and the children feeling bitter toward her/their husband/dad, that man seem to be saying, "I am still the FATHER to these children and deserve all the comfort that these children can offer to me." He doesn't care and has no idea that his action is like rubbing salt over ever-fresh wounds.
1 person likes this
@kingparker (9698)
• United States
27 Dec 11
That is definitely a disrespect act from her husband, he should know better, once he betray his wife, he shouldn't ask for forgiveness like that, and what he just trying to do was showing off his children and wife that he happily remarried. That just not right. M should ask his husband never return to her house ever again.
• Malaysia
27 Dec 11
Now that M's husband sees how smart and capable his children are by M, he probably regrets it and that probably explains why he keeps coming back visiting M and his children, even though he knows he is not wanted anymore (I doubt it).
• Romania
15 Feb 12
I don't think the husband did something wrong. He just wanted to reunite with his family for Christmas. In his culture, the man is probably allowed to have more wives. I think that the children from the first wife love their father, but they are not willing to accept his new family, who might want their land and fortune.
• India
26 Dec 11
this is one of the serious examlple of disrespect of a women. more in human terms and then in terms of religion, i guess we need to play a threate on this subject and need to showup the consequences of this dreaddfull activity.