The thought is what matters most...

Malaysia
December 29, 2011 4:01am CST
Whenever I receive gifts or presents from my friends or family members, I don't think much about 'what is it?', 'how much is the value?', 'is it bought from expensive or cheap shop?', 'is it locally made or imported goods?' and etc etc you know all those 'calculative' attitude. For me, just the thought or intention of wanting to give me something, or even just a greeting or wishes, are what makes me happy. Just the thought and the clean heart, without expecting anything 'expensive' in return, is what touches me. But in life, there are people who place so much importance in the value of things they give that they expect the receivers or others will do the same for them. Worst, there are people who after receiving their gifts and being not happy with what they get, complain about it or even reject it, clearly being unappreciative, even disrespecting of the simple and honest act of wanting to make someone happy.
3 people like this
9 responses
@tabatha7 (189)
29 Dec 11
Usually, I would agree with you. I am honoured if somebody wants to take the time, effort, and energy... and actually cares enough to give me something. It doesn't matter if it costs them anything or not. However, I'm considered the "black sheep" of my family. And a few years ago, my aunt & uncle gave me a pair of black, wooly slippers. Well, they looked like they were made from a black sheep's wool. I was happy that they wanted to give me something. And yet, it really made me wonder: what were they trying to imply?
@glesil_00 (1147)
• Philippines
29 Dec 11
Yes the value of the gift or present is valuable and its not about where it was bought, how much it is. It is about whom gave it and whoever gave you, accept it and appreciate it. The person will be glad that you appreciated the effort of what have been done, and will be happy its worth to give you something. In some instances though there is present or gift i don't appreciate and i told someone about it if she gave me something as a present or gift it should not be a flower especially if its valentines day, because i do not appreciate it. Its common that during this season everyone is giving and receiving flowers. I want it to be different in some way. If it is not valentines day flower is much appreciated and i value it much.
• Malaysia
29 Dec 11
I have a friend who is calculative-minded on the gifts that she received. In the earlier stages of our friendship, her calculativeness didn't show yet. But as we get closer, she began to comment on the things that people gave her on her birthday. The first time, I gave her a funny animal toy, something that both of us like to joke about (this was ok), then second time, I gave her a yellow ceramic container with a picture of smiley giving out a big smile. I really think it was cute and just looking at smiley's big smile can brighten up anyone's day until a few months later, she told me to never give her a container anymore. Being a sporty friend, I didn't keep any hard feelings for her. Then the following year, I handcrafted a crystal bracelet for her. When I gave it to her, she rejected it. I said, "why?" and then said to her "just take it, it's up to you whether you want to keep it or not". Even though I felt insulted by her attitude, I still was able to 'forgive' her. Then, the following year, I gave her an expensive batik from Indonesia. This time she was quiet because the gift was expensive and it was bought from oversea.
• India
30 Dec 11
I don’t agree with this all the time. There are people who I have in very close relations who are quite well off but very stingy. They just don’t like to gift anything to anybody yet on occasions when they HAVE TO gift things as per norms they search out the cheapest things and just dump it on me with a lot of sweet talk, expecting me to be grateful and thankful. My point is, why gift anything at all if you don’t want to spend money which you can afford to! I feel rather humiliated by such false gestures. However, if its just friends or colleagues, then yes; the thought matters more than the value of the gift. Even a cost free e-card on my special days from a friend is more welcome than such cheap gifts from pretentious relatives.
• Davao, Philippines
30 Dec 11
Nice point-of-view you have there, hon. But I think some people became rich BECAUSE they are stingy. There are people like that in any society. But I still think that cheap is better than useless. Know what I mean? I am really thankful to those who are rich that would give me something I could really use like paper, at least they thought about what I really need compared to those who would give me something I could never use. Let me give you an example. Last year someone gave me lipstick despite knowing that I am allergic to almost ALL synthetic/commercialized products. In order not to waste it, I gave it to a friend that I had to search in facebook for a whole 5 minutes that I can use to do other things. It messed up my schedule. At least when a rich friend gave me a gift, it was a ball-point pen that costs P 12.00 in our school bookstore when I left mine and I really need it to take down notes and ink the remaining part of a certain illustration I made to be passed that day. He was asking what I would want for a Christmas present that I told him that a ball-point pen is good enough for me. I don't know why he laughed, I didn't ask because I was already panicking. But I was able to use the pen until it ran out of ink the next few days afterwards. I don't know what your situation is but at least the people that you knew were thoughtful enough to present you a gift compared to hurting you in Christmas. I can't tell you enough how it sucks to want to tear someone apart during Christmas time and what's worse? I had to bring the feeling in the New Year too. Happy MyLotting!
• United States
29 Dec 11
It's sad that people nowadays put so much importance on the value of gifts. my mom used to tell me that back in her day they were grateful if they got gifts at all because money was so tight back then, but that when they did get a gift they appreciated it a whole lot more. Unfortunately it's about the greed. These so called holidays are very commercialized. These commercials indicate that if their family members really loved they would get them such & such as a gift. And it's not just the children that are greedy for these things that they just have to have, but sadly it's the adults too. just look at the long lines at the returns section of dept. stores. All these people waiting to get refunds on the gifts that their loved ones gave them for something they really want. It really is a very sad world we live in.
@squallming (1776)
• Malaysia
29 Dec 11
This is very common nowadays. People are becoming more and more materialistic. The more expensive the gift is, the more happy they would be. However, I don't think we should have such bad thought. I would be equally happy when people give me a gift. Of course if it's something that my girlfriend gives, I will be even happier but what I mean is that the sincerity that others have in giving us something. It involves certain level of care and love, friendship or family relationship. It is something to be cherished.
• Malaysia
29 Dec 11
You are right squalming. A lot of time it is due to being too materialistic. Many people associate happiness with getting the things that they want. This is being foolish. Many prefer expensive things than sincerity of the hearts. What will become of this world?
@ajagogo (153)
• Philippines
29 Dec 11
I also believe in "It's the thought that counts" saying. That's why every time I need to give someone a gift, I make sure that I am the one thinking and choosing my gift for that someone. I remember a colleague who is every time we have an exchange gift during Christmas, he just ask someone to buy a gift for her.It made me sad thinking what if I am the who will received that gift.
• Malaysia
29 Dec 11
Yes, there are people who just like receiving but not giving. I think this is selfish, very self-centered and ignorant of other people's feelings. This is sad indeed.
• Philippines
30 Dec 11
People have differences of attitudes. Some people are living in a simple life without expectations and some people have no satisfactions in life ,that's the people who didn't know how to appreciate a small things in life. When we received something to our friends,family or love ones we should appreciate all the things that we received in life because they make efforts just to give that simple gift. They worked hard and did there best just to surprised us. Lets live without expectations and we will surely live a happy individual.
@SinfulRose (3529)
• Davao, Philippines
30 Dec 11
In this day and age, you're a rare jewel, hon. In this realm where we act and move things, all we have are materials that's why it's called "material world". Thinking about other's thoughtfulness, how they effort to think of what you might want or need, and their generosity means that Christmas is not wasted on you compared to a bunch of people in my family. But instead of wishing they'll think like you I just hope they would just stop their favoritism system based on who's child is whose soon or I'll erupt like a mad volcano. lol. Happy MyLotting!
@kingparker (9698)
• United States
29 Dec 11
You know what, the same attitude of my aunt. She expected someone give her something valuable, with expensive values on it. In return, she gave something cheap, and thought it someone owe her a big time. I most likely won't want to deal with her, and I don't even like to speak to her too. Shame on her.
@lajonez (478)
• Poland
29 Dec 11
I always appreciate gifts and even just a wishes and i'm happy with this because i feel important for this person because he/she remembert about me, and it's the most important for me :D