Spicing up the relationship

@moakamsg (114)
January 5, 2012 3:31pm CST
Hello, Me & my husband have been married for 2yrs. and have been together for 6 yrs, we now have two small children. We have very busy schedules and try to make as much time for each other as possible but that rarely happens because we are either too tired or don't have a babysitter. It feels like we just don't have time for just the two of us...even for a weekend. I don't want things to take a bad turn, what would you recommend to keep my husband happy?
5 responses
@yanzalong (10198)
• Indonesia
6 Jan 12
Most people who have jobs feel the same I think. A husband and a wife who both work rarely have time for each other. When you two go home after work, you already feel exhausted. One thing I don't understand you and your husband don't even have time at the weekend. Is it because you both work at weekends? Try finding a little time to discuss it. You could phone your husband at lunch time ask if he has time to talk it over.
@moakamsg (114)
6 Jan 12
I work 4 days a week and my day off is usually dedicated to my daughter's or son's doctor's appointments. But yes my husband works 6 days a week so we rarely see each other and by the time we are home and kids are in bed we are exhausted and just want to SLEEP SLEEP SLEEP! I mentioned to someone above we will just have to make an extra effort...as far as discussing..uhhh it doesn't always work out because he doesn't always respond to the conversation and I end up doing all the taliking (guess its a man thing). I must say one thing we are good about is going to lunch together a couple times during the week.
@ayvanee (149)
• Philippines
6 Jan 12
Good day moakamsg! Truly, that is a difficult task, balancing time with the husband, children and work. To make your husband happy, I guess you have to cook him meals and have play time together with your children. You could also schedule some alone time twice a month, arrange a date or something like that. You have to keep in mind too that when you're home, you should not give them what's left of you but what's BEST of you.
@moakamsg (114)
6 Jan 12
Well helloooo there ayvanee! Yes balancing marriage, children, and being a working professional is a bit difficult. I think taking more time out and dedicating it to spending some alone twice a month does sound like a good idea. As for giving him the BEST of me...now that will have to be after the kids are asleep and a boost of energy lol!!! Maybe I should try an energy drink or something. Thanks!
5 Jan 12
Whenver any couple has children everything changes and this can put a strain on the relationship. This is a very busy and demanding time for both of you. It is good that you are alert to the possibility of things taking a turn for the worse and I recommend that you try and make time for your husband after the children have been put to bed. I know that you will both be very tired but it is important. Ideally it would be good if you were able to go out on a date together. Are there any parents or grandparents close by that could look after the children for an hour or two?
@moakamsg (114)
5 Jan 12
Hello, Yes I know how important it is to make the time and yes we are always exhausted not to mention my daughter still wakes up in the middle of the night and refuses to go back to sleep in her own bed...so even if we do try we end of falling asleep. And yes I know with children your life changes and ours did BIG TIME but I'm okay with it and have learned to adjust. My mom and grandmother are the ones who help us out with the kids the majority of the time so if we're not doing things as a family then I really don't like to bother then. My sister/brother in law help out but they have two kids of their own and I just don't like to be a burden. Other than that we don't really have anyone else and I don't trust everyone with my kids.
@ronnyb (6120)
• Jamaica
6 Jan 12
Wow I am not in a relationship but I think you will have to either find way to spend time when the kids are around .Maybe you could try giving them activites to do while you and your husband spend time together .ALternatively you could get your relatives to share some of teh babysiting activities but as I am sure you both realise you need to find time for each other . I mean it doesnt have to be anything fancy ,maybe a candlelit dinner while the kids are asleep or you could go the park and allow them to play while the bigger kids play
@kingparker (9698)
• United States
6 Jan 12
Now, you are with 2 children, things might be totally different now. Why not try to take your children under your parents watch whenever they have time, and squeeze sometime from your busy schedule, and make up for each other. I think that is the best way to spice up your relationship with your husband.