February 10, 2012 11:22pm CST
We are bombarded with a lot media image about this may-december affairs from ashton-demi to belo-hayden. In fact it had sired the term cougar. I really do not believe that age matters myself but there are times where I can still be shocked about the possibility. For example, I have a friend engaged in a May-December affair. He is in his mid twenties while his partner is in the early forties. Despite my liberal attitude about this stuff, I could not help but wonder if my friend is in the losing end. He is just starting living his life, and one of the greatest milestones in ones life is having children. If they eventually get married, I think that option is no longer available for them. That part saddens me. What about you, what are your views about this?
11 Feb 12
Hello. I think you're being a little harsh. If this woman makes your friend happy (and she is a good person) you should support your friend. Your opinion might upset your friend, so I wouldn't let your friend know your true feelings. But I understand what you mean about about may to december relationships though. I hope it works out for your friend.
15 Feb 12
Its harsh, but a glaring reality. I keep these thoughts to myself. For one I'm a female, I know how harsh aging does to us, plus the fact that we have body clock issues. Unfortunately, it cannot be denied that if my friend wanted his own children then this is going to be a problem because of the age problem. He would need to reprogram himself with other options like adoption or siring children to other women via in vitro fertilization. A lot of things make us happy, including really fatty foods but it does not mean it will always make us happy.
11 Feb 12
I happen to be in a May-December relationship. It has been going on for the past 5 years until lately when my partner found another girl of his age group. He professes to continue to love me and I know deep in my heart that what he is saying is somewhat true; however, it pains me knowing I cannot compete with someone much younger than I am. I have tried to end the relationship several times but my partner simply would not let me go. I knew the risks when I entered the relationship and this was one of them. We still continue to communicate with each other but I am trying my best to give him the freedom he deserves. It pains me a lot but I understand why he has cheated me in as much as this one of the pitfalls of a May-December relationship. Nothing but a miracle will make this relationship work.
15 Feb 12
Knowing and doing are two different things. I am sorry about the state of your lovelife, no one deserves to be put second to people they put first. I am not really sure if this is the right adage but I read this once and it kind of stuck on me- Cheaters can change, giving them a chance for the first offense is okay, second chance is acceptable, but the third time then I guess you deserved to be cheated upon. Love yourself because you are wonderful and deserves to be loved. Be happy yahnee!
11 Feb 12
i think, it is not the age but the maturity of both parties that matter. my sister married a man 10 years younger than her but the relationship didn't work. of course when they were starting, all the excitement and loving feeling lead them to the marriage but when starting a family, they have different views and opinions. they argue a lot and the man, being younger, usually was on the losing side. he has not enough life experience to base his decisions on. that adds to his young heart wanting more fun and excitement while the woman who is more matured wants some sincerity and serious decisions for the family. peers from the young man's group adds more pressure. it simply did not work. now the man has taken a woman of her age who can understand his needs more.
11 Feb 12
I often see May-December relationships as ones that either partner seeks fulfillment from. Perhaps the person has a desire to be with someone older? I had always wanted someone who was older than myself, that being said my oldest was 9 years. My ex husband and I. I realized later that I was in fact seeking something in that relationship and eventually and years later, I did get what I needed, and we divorced later on.