The Encounter

February 16, 2012 8:38am CST
THE ENCOUNTER Boy: (Walks up to a bunch of girls seemingly blocking a sidewalk) Wouldn't the world be a better place if girls would know the difference between a sidewalk and a gossip joint? Girl: Excuse me? Boy: You realize you and your girlfriends are blocking the sidewalk, and it's really inconvenient for a lot of people to get through. Girl: (Looks at the entire stretch of the empty sidewalk) Yep, I can see that. And it would incredibly be very hard to go through a company of "three" gossiping girls, right? It would seem too crowded, yes? Boy: Well who knows, maybe some people respect personal spaces, which you girlies obviously don't. Girl: That's probably true, but maybe you should've tried to ask to be excused first? But you probably judged us already, and assumed we'd be ridiculously impolite to be interrupted with our gossiping. Boy: Well, that's only partly true because I judged only you. What can I say? You look it. Girl: Ugh! Girlfriend 1: Is everything okay? Girl: Don't worry, I can handle this. Boy: Oh yeah, you think you can? Girl: Hah! With pleasure! Boy: (Sarcastically) Oooh. I'm scared but I'm really intrigued. Imagine the comfort of hearing useless gossips, oh that's golden! Unfortunately you don't own the sidewalk, so move it. Girl: Why? Do you own it? Boy: Who knows? I might be a very rich guy. Girl: Oh, so why are you walking again? By your stench, you seem to have been walking for at least an hour, or a day. Driver feeding up your cow? Boy: Ahaha. That's very funny. A pretty girl and some humor. Very rare. Too rare actually. (Curiously) Are you from earth? Girl: Some logic you have there. That is clearly what you could expect from a handsome, self-centered, egotistical guys like you. Boy: Aha! You said handsome! Girl: You said pretty first. Boy: Well, that's because I'm polite. Girl: Oh yes, I can see that. (Looks beyond the guy) Very clearly. (Looks back at the guy) Oh wait, you're over here. Sorry, the sight of being so polite seems so far away. In fact, actually I think it is. Boy: You think you're smart huh? Girl: Uh uh, but you think I am. Boy: Hmmm. I would If I have to deviate from the standard definition of smart, and go for the absolute opposite. Girl: Haha. I won't be surprised if you know the absolute opposite (smirks). Hey, I'm curious. Boy: I knew you'd be interested. Girl: THE most interested, as to why we are still having this conversation? Boy: Because you girlies still haven't cleared the path. Girl: Well, you still haven't asked. Boy: Oh, so all of this is still not asking? Am I going way too fast for you? (Slowly, zombie-like) Hey Maria, may I pass? Girl: My name's not Maria. Boy: Julia? Girl: Nope! Boy: Shiela? Girl: No. Boy: Sandra? Girl: Seriously? Boy: Heather? Girl: (Annoyed) You're really not too good at asking, are you? Boy: Wilma? Girl: (Angrily, almost shouting) It's Sarah, you moron! Boy: I knew that. Sarah: Yeah right. Yoda! Boy: Yes, I can read minds. Plus I can read your ID as well, and it is still on you. Sarah: (Embarrassed. Flips ID) Boy: I think it's a little too late for that, "Sarah" Don't you think? Sarah: Whatever, smart-idiot! Boy: Ah! You said "smart" Sarah: I also said "idiot" Sarah: You're making fun of me, aren't you? Boy: I would, but it's hardly possible to equate "fun" with "you". Plus I also wouldn't equate "making fun" to "insulting". Sarah: (Annoyed) You're wasting my time. Boy: No, actually, you are. You're still on my way. Sarah: Would it kill you to ask? Boy: Yup, and I'm too young to die. But since it's the same feeling right now, here it goes. (Insultingly) Sarah, would you let me through please? (Puppy eyes) Sarah: (Pauses, and says to the girls) Let the idiot pass. Boy: I'd say thank you but you seem intent to continue on with the banters. Sarah: Banters? (Laughs) I was serious, you "idiot"! Boy: Look, I have to go. Maybe we can continue this sometime, if you insist, so let me have your number. Sarah: (Looks at the boy intently, thinks for a moment, then grabs her cellphone from her bag) Why don't you give me your number, I'll ring your phone, then you'll have my number. Girlfriends 1 & 2: (Jaws dropped) Boy: Cool, let me grab my phone (Reached in his pocket and gets his cheap-looking mobile phone) Sarah: (Laughs sheepishly) Oooh, nifty! That's your phone, rich boy? I must be in the wrong century (laughs) Boy: Rich men don't always show off. Sarah: Bleh. You'd be the first one. If you were even rich. Boy: (Looks at his phone, then puts the phone back in his pocket) My battery's dead. Sarah: Wahaha. What a shame? Are you sure the battery's just dead? Or is that just a dummy phone? Boy: (Felt insulted) Oh well, it was nice wasting my time with you, I'm going now. Sarah: (Stops the boy and almost shouted) Wait! Boy: What? You haven't run out of insults? Sarah: Well, you started it Boy: (Turns away again, defeated) Sarah: (Eagerly) I'll write down my number. Boy: Oh hoho. Yeah right? You think I'd fall for that? Sarah: Do you have a pen? Boy: And what, give someone else's number? Sarah: Boy, you have serious trust issues! Boy: You want me to trust you? Sarah: No, but I wouldn't pass up on the delightful feeling of insulting you even more. Pen? Boy: I thought that was my job. Sarah: It was but you suck at it. You must have gotten fired. Pen? Boy: I don't have a pen! Do I look like I have a pen? Sarah: Oh sorry. How could I think someone who doesn't have wits would even have a pen? Boy: Right! Why don't you send me a text message instead? I'll give you my number, you send me a text, I go home, I charge my phone, then I get your message. We could continue this war. Sarah: (Thinks) What if you give me someone else's number? Boy: Hey, I'm the one with trust issues here. Sarah: (Fiddles with her phone, then composes a text message) Boy: Is it sent? Sarah: I would have sent it but then you haven't given me your number yet. Smarty pants! Boy:(Embarrassed) Well. Uhm. It was a test. Making sure you weren't just making it up. Sarah:(Disgusted) Ok that's just low. Well? Your number? Boy: 09173356988. Do you need load? You know it only costs a buck to send a text message. Sarah: Ahaha. That's cute but I am on postpay. Why? Are you on prepay? Rich guy? Boy: Well, is it sent? Sarah: Done! Good riddance! Boy: What did you text? Let me see! Sarah: Hah! You'll see when your crappy phone is back up and running. Boy: How would I know if... Sarah: You didn't bump into 300 gossiping girls today, did you? Boy: 307! Sarah: You'll see it when you switch your phone back on. Now run along! Boy: As you witch, err, wish. Sarah: (Sarcastic laugh) Haha. Very funny!(Looks to the boy as if she's waiting to hear his next words) Boy: (Smiles) Well, the handsome, self-centered, egotistical guy is leaving now. You can all resume your gossiping. Sarah: Hah! I'm still waiting for you to leave? (Still waiting for his next words) Boy: That sounded like a question. Sarah: It isn't. Boy: It sounded like one. Sarah: It isn't. Well? Boy: Leaving, then. (Looks at her straight in the eyes, then nods at her girlfriends, then looks at her one last time, and then turns to walk away slowly) Sarah: (Seemed annoyed, steps forward and shouted) So that's it? No names? I gave you mine! Boy: (Turns back, looks back at Sarah with a smile, then walks slowly at first, then a little faster towards her) Sarah: (Hopeful smile) Boy: I thought you'd never ask. Sarah: (Nervous smile) Boy: But now that you did Sarah: (Still nervous) Yes? Boy: My answer is... No! (Raised his eyebrow) Bwahaha. Sarah: (Annoyed to the max) You, idiot! Go away! (Hits the boy with her umbrella) Boy: (Devilish laugh) Bwahaha. (Then runs away from Sarah) Sarah: (Furious) That's right! You run, you idiot. (Still very furious and shouting) I don't care what your name is! "Idiot" will have to do! (Disappointed, looks back at her girlfriends) Sarah: What? Girlfriend 1: Wow! Girlfriend 2: That was just wow! Sarah: I know, right? That idiot was impossible! Girlfriend 1: No. You were impossible! Sarah: What? Why? Girlfriend 2: I can't believe you fell for that! You gave him your name and practically gave him your number. Girlfriend 1: No, there wasn't a "fall for that" thing that went on. She totally encouraged him! Sarah: No! What? No! I didn't. Girlfriend 1: That guy would think he tricked you into getting your name and your number. Sarah: Wait. Girlfriend 1: And he would think he's so smart that he actually did get your name and number. Sarah: You don't understand. Girlfriend 2: But the truth is, you actually mean to give them to him?! Hah! You, flirt! Sarah: No guys! That's not fair! That is totally uncalled for. Girlfriend 1: And then, you think you outsmarted him. Sarah: What are you, a shrink now? Girlfriend 2: But then, he outsmarted you again by not giving out his name. Sarah: (Bites her lip) Girlfriend 1: And now you want him more. Sarah: (Looks at the girls, and then thinks, then asks shyly) Was I that obvious? Girlfriends 1 & 2 looked at each other with a disgusted look on their faces, then walked away as if to say "duh". Sarah:(Sighed, then looked back to the boy's direction, who's now no longer in sight) (Smiles, and then whispers) That guy totally likes me! (Turns away, and then runs after the girls) (Meanwhile, boy arrives at his condo unit, throws his bag on the couch, rushes to his room, plugs in his cellphone and placed it on the bedside table, then throws himself onto the bed) Boy: (Looks at the ceiling, thinks for a moment and with sheepish smile, whispers) That girl totally likes me! [Beep beep] Boy: (Looks at the cellphone, grabs it, and then clicks on a button) "One Message Received" (To Be Continued....)
1 response
@cyclopz (199)
• Philippines
16 Feb 12
haha.. I really had a laugh just reading your article. You really have talent in writing and now i'm intrigued on what would be the next article would be. I think you would try having your own article in a newspaper, you could get lots of money doing a part time writer or maybe you're already a writer as a profession. It'st quite amazing that someone could come up with such article out of nothing. Or was it was all based from your true to life experience? Could you continue on the next part on what happened after that?haha. I'll be looking forward in reading it once you have it posted. Thanks for the fun article. :)