Leaving Home in the Name of Love

Philippines
March 23, 2012 6:26pm CST
In my beloved country, many turn their backs on their loved ones to go to a foreign country in the hope of earning enough money to keep their family alive. In the name of love, they leave home to care for other families instead of their own.They miss birthdays, weddings, graduations, baptisms, house blessings, dedications, anniversaries, christmas, reunions, bondings, family dinners, etc. Of course, the children are affected who grow up without one or sometimes both parents, missing out on the parental love and guidance they most need. Usually, they are raised by relatives or whoever they are assigned to. These things takes a toll on family life in general. The children may be found to have developed resentment and other negative consequences. A research found out that many of these parents leaving their home in the name of love are in denial and even delusional about their situations, and that of their loved ones. The money they sent home becomes a justification for everything that they are unable to provide for their loved ones. What are your experiences about this?
1 person likes this
5 responses
• Philippines
24 Mar 12
This is a matter of understanding and a two way give and take relationship.The one working abroad is giving a lot of sacrifices, emotionally and physically tortured (not in the sense of physical hurting), but knowing most of mothers working overseas as domestic help (the labor they've been going through) Yes, the ones who are left behind (kids in particular) also suffer emotional torture, but not physical. I am a product of this situation, our mom left us when we're in our teens.But, because we understand her goal and dreams, we helped her to reach what she dream for us. I understand some kids becomes a victim of domestic violence especially those ones who are being left under relatives care (when both parents worked abroad).We cannot blame those kids. However, for those kids who are left under grandparents care, or with their mom alone,cared a lot with lots of love- I don't see any reason why some kids still becomes rebel.Sometimes kids only uses excuses to justify their mistakes. (ugh)
1 person likes this
@lynboobsy11 (11343)
• Philippines
24 Mar 12
Being a responsible parent that's the only thing they knew if they have really the ability to work abroad. It is there chance to give their family a good future, quality education, and luxury . But there are a lot of issues here, broken families, behavioral differences between the children because of lack of one father or mother. I'm not saying that all family are like these but most of the time it is the main problem. It depends on the one who will left behind the children on how he/she handle it. But that's part of life and survival we can't live without taking by chance, life is like gamble, lots of adventure.
@jazzyrae (1745)
• United States
23 Mar 12
I left my familly in the name of love. I do not regret it at all i love my familly but i also fell in love with my boyfriend. Let me tell ya my mom was not a fan. She did not think he was good enough and wanted me to marry a millitary man. She forbid us from dating and did everything in her power to keep us apart. You can not stop love though i moved out at 18 i have been living with my boyfriend for a bout a year now he is the love of my life and i want to spend the rest of my life with him. My mom dose not approve of him or my deccision but she is finally speaking to me again. She refuses to talk to him though. She also will not attend events where he is at : like my graduation. She even says she will not attend my wedding if it with him. It is a sacrafice but i will not give up some one i love just to make another person i love happy. This happened in my familly decades ago. my great aunt left germany during ww2 with an american solider. Her familly never talked to her again sad parents have to be so my way or the high way.
1 person likes this
@yahnee (1243)
• Philippines
24 Mar 12
Families just need to make sacrifices in order to have a better life. In my country, where there is a high rate on unemployment, many do really seek for better job opportunities in other countries. We are one of the largest sources of overseas workers that has contributed a lot to the economy. While there are always negative consequences of parents working abroad, we cannot really blame them since it would be a lot better to be away than experience poverty and degradation. Many families were able to improve their status in life when a parent or both work in another country. The local employment opportunities are quite dim and those who have a job are often underpaid and the earnings are not enough for a decent life. While we recognize the values of having the presence of both parents inside the home, what matters most for some is being able to rise above the current status and be able to have a better life. Poverty is also taking its toll on a family and if working abroad is the solution, we just have to accept the consequences.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
24 Mar 12
well i think that those who leave their families to provide more for them is just noble and right. it is hard and would really take a toll on their family. but addressing their physiological needs for them to live a healthy life away from the terrors of hunger and poverty is a top priority. they just need to always communicate with their love ones so that they would feel that they were abandoned.