r-e-s-p-o-n-s-i-b-i-l-i-t-y

Philippines
March 24, 2012 10:17pm CST
Getting married means starting your own life with your own family. What comes with it? You gotta stand with your own two feet. Stable job, budget your money, having your own house.... For some, they would start by living in their parents house temporarily, since getting a new house is a bit difficult thing to accomplish. But, up to what extent? I don't mean to offend anybody who might be doing this... For some that I know, it seems like they have forgotten to do that. It seems like they've been living with their parents forever and the thing is, they do have a lot of children and even jobless sometimes. I mean it's not my business...but I think men, especially men should at least work hard and establish something before making his own family. I can see some who bring home a family, the wife's working, the parents are old, his jobless and likes hanging out on the streets with his friends, gambling with a few pennies in his pocket, drunk...unrealistic? No.....It's just the harsh reality, the ugly truth.
2 people like this
7 responses
@dandan07 (1908)
• China
25 Mar 12
Here in China, more and more young people live with their parents even they get married and have their own children. The house price is so that more than 80% of people can not afford that. If the new couple can accept to live with their parents things will be ok. Now many girls want to live in separately from the parents after they get married, so many of them will not marry the guy without his own house. To many boys from poor families, if they can find a girl do not call for the house, they will get married soon. But in most cases, the boys will ask their parents for financial support. That does not means present young people are lack of sense of responsibility. But the time is too hard, and left few chances for young people to lead a good life. Even when my parents were young, they also chosen to live with their parents, and they have their own house at their 40s. I think to many young people, they can also get those at their 40s. But at their 20s or 30s, they should get married and have their own children.
• China
26 Mar 12
do you think girls want a house before marriage are idoit, someone told me so.
@SomeCowgirl (32271)
• United States
25 Mar 12
Life is hard, and we have to take what we can. It used to be, I think, that couples would be sure they could be out on their own before getting married. Now we get married and we live at home until we can get on our own two feet. It's part of the rush I think, the rush of what we think we need. Having been in that situation, I say it's much better to be out on your own, be able to live on your own and have finances in order and under control before joining in union with anyone.
25 Mar 12
Very true.
@kaeirole (669)
• Philippines
25 Mar 12
i agree to that..most people who get married nowadays aren't really that prepared before they enter a new chapter of their lives..they don't understand what really a marriage life is..they only think it's a union of 2 hearts..but they didn't see the words--with full responsibility.. most get married, but they live with their parents..but..their parents are the ones who shoulder their expenses..or..they may live in a separate place..rented or owned..but their parents still provides them monetary support..and even their vices like drinking, smoking, clubbing..their parents are still the ones who pay for it.. we should think all aspects of our life if we are really ready to get married..getting married means we're getting the full responsibility of ourselves and the family we are about to build...and it's not or parents' responsibility.. and we can't take it, then we shouldn't get married and just be a pain in our parents' a** again..
25 Mar 12
Agreed.
@dazzledlady (1624)
• Philippines
25 Mar 12
That is the a reality for some people all around the world, it may be part of their culture, force to be in that state due to some circumstances, or out of pure irresponsibility. When you plan to get married or is married and is willing to start a family, I think it the responsible thing to do is prepare for it. Plan ahead if you are capable of raising a family. Because I see a lot of people, especially at my place who starts a family and do not have any means to support them. The one who will suffer the most are the children. Imagine them not being able to get the right nutrition because their parents cant provide food 3 times a day, Imagine them not able to read and right because their parents cannot afford to send them to school. They have many years to live, what will happened to their future?. It is a sad scenario and it is happening. Adults should not be irresponsible when it comes to starting a family. It is ok if you want to be live life irresponsibly but make sure it will be only you who will be affected by it.
25 Mar 12
I agree.
@megamatt (14331)
• United States
27 Mar 12
I think the real problem is taking this really big step before they are mentally mature and ready. And everyone matures at different levels. But some people are really gung-ho, not really realizing the consequences of the matter, not realizing that this is a huge responsibility that they are going to change their life. No they can handle it, they get all excited, and then the harsh reality hits them about just how big of a responsibility of getting married, having children, living without a safety net as. And the world is harsh, very harsh. There are times where people who throw themselves out before they are mentally ready and then that leads to a lot of broken, battered people. You see many of these broken people, living in poverty, living in misery, living on the street, whatever, a great deal of them had wide eyes and great hopes before. There are times where society tends to pressure us to do things, before we are ready maturely. But the final decision is up to you. Some people think that they are the exception to the rule.
@CFstats (82)
25 Mar 12
When I got married the first time, we lived in my Grandpa's house just for the first 9 months so that we could save enough money to get our own place. My husband had a job, and after nine months, we did move and buy our own condominium. I do believe that the husband needs to be trust worthy to be able to not only support his wife but first himself and also kids if they plan to have them. So definately, men be responsible before getting married!
• Philippines
25 Mar 12
Definitely! I work as a Health Care Provider in a community, There was a time when a woman come in the community giving birth, yet they're not prepared. I feel so sorry that those couple were not able to prepare a money, but how I wish that they had thought that to have a child is not just a game but it means to be responsible on where they stand. It's not easy to be responsible enough but you have to stand in your own feet.