Staying off of ex-girlfriend's Facebook after breakup...IMPOSSIBLE!

June 20, 2012 3:35am CST
Ok, I know for a fact that nobody likes to read about other people's breakup misery and broken hearts but this is pertaining to the specific issue of trying to avoid checking my previous significant other's facebook, twitter, Gplus, etc. constantly throughout the day. I find myself gravitating towards her pages whenever I am near my computer (which is a hell of a lot), and checking up on every little thing she does or says, or any little thing that anyone else does and says to her. It's become an obsession that I can't break from. I find myself analysing everything she posts in relation to what it means about her feelings. "Why is she so happy?" "Is that status about me?" "Why is she liking that guy's photo?" "She can see I'm online, why doesn't she talk to me?" YES, it's pathetic! YES, I'm aware of that. I'm usually such a level-headed individual, this is really concerning me. I'm sure back before social media breakups must have been easier. Maybe the straight cut from the person would have been excruciating but at least the person wouldn't be torturing them self like I am. This is 2012, Facebook is a part of life. I can't just ignore that. Neither can I delete her as we supposedly had a clean and friendly breakup; deleting her would just make me look childish and petty in front of her and our shared friends. It would also prove that I'm clearly still thinking about her. I want her to think I'm as nonchalant as she is. Has anyone else ever had this problem?
1 person likes this
7 responses
@SomeCowgirl (32270)
• United States
29 Jul 12
The problem is she's probably not as nonchalant as you think she is. I can understand what you are going through. When I separated from my ex it was extrememly hard for longer then I'd care to admit. Even though it hurt me I would look at his page, but now I don't even care to... You will eventually stop looking at her pages. You can make it where she doesn't come up on your newsfeed and even block her from seeing you on chat (you won't see her either).. That would help a little. (this pertains to facebook).
20 Jul 12
I'm doing exactly what you are doing, but the only difference is that.. I'm using my cousin's fb account to check my ex-bf's profile coz I blocked him a month after we broke up when he started to post photos together with his new girlfriend. Every time I'm about to view his profile, I'm always shaking wondering what's his new statuses are. Probably, we're doing this because we haven't moved on yet. But I'm glad that I'm not that obsessed in checking his profile daily. I just check on it when I feel like I'm missing him. Just try to control your self.
• India
20 Jul 12
Lol.. That is true man.. Same as me.. That is what our possessiveness is. But if we just be some what liberal they will love us more..
@katie0 (5212)
• Japan
23 Jun 12
It probably is but you know what? Try to really live this, to check and all until it gets boring your in your heart, accepted. I think we have many fases when breaking up and we must live all of them, if we rush or pretend it doesn't heal.
• United States
21 Jun 12
Hi personalspit, Back when MySpace was booming, I used to do that with an ex of mine also. It doesn't do anything but make you feel as if you are crazy. Analyzing is good, but when we tend to OVERanalyze that is when it takes over your mind and that is all you seem to think about. If she really wants to talk to you, she will contact you. Unless, she is waiting to hear from you first and wants you to make the initial contact. Enough time needs to pass to where this doesn't becoming your first priority everytime you get near a computer. As time goes by, it will be easier to deal with and then it will just get to the point to where you don't even care anymore. It may seem hard to believe and who knows how long it will take you to get there, but you will get there. I hope this finds you well. Best of luck to you!
• India
20 Jun 12
Hi friend, this kind of thoughts and experience are quite common with lovers. Even you break up with her, still you are loving her in your inner heart, so only you are interested in her activities and searching it. Yes, really it is impossible to avoid this kind of thoughts. I think she is also doing the same thing.
• United States
20 Jun 12
Wbhen I left tim I deleted him from my friends list. we did not have a big fight or anything. he borrowed money that he never planned to pay back. So,there was nothing I wanted to see on his page. There was nothing on my page I wanted him to see. I never had any reason to know how he was doing. If I were in your shoes I would make myself a new pagea and invite all my friends and let her be my friend there and no where else. She could be just as you are and you just not know it.