Dealing with people who seemed too sensitive
By chiyochan
@chiyosan (30184)
Philippines
August 24, 2012 1:28pm CST
Have you got a friend who is actually "sensitive" or is way too sensitive for himself or herself? Lately i have in communication with a friend who seemed easily hurt, who seemed like one blow or one hit may be too devastating for him to fathom. The thing is i think the issue he shared with me is not that heavy of a burden for him to act as if it is close to the end of the world. I understand that we all deal with problems and issues differently and yes, i understand that for him it is quite a huge or big thing... but i can't seem to help him at least understannd that he can get over it, that he will emerge okay and good, and very well and that he does not need to sulk and to think that everything is over because of the incident. I told him there are actually good things, or blessings in disguise with what has happened but he seemed a bit "closed minded" about it and kept putting himself down.
I do not want him to feel that this is the case, and i feel that he is really affected about it... I can't do nothing to help him and make him feel less burdened. He is the first guy friend who came to me and cried and has me worried that i kept on actually sending him inspirational messages and he would acknowledge it actually and i know he appreciates it as he has told me.
Has anyone of you know how to deal withsuch situations, or people who does seem to have lost some of the hope he has - due to one thing that has happened to him. I hope you can share notes as to how i should deal as i really want to be there for him and make him feel that life is wonderful, it is good, it is not to be wasted... thank you all in advance.
1 person likes this
6 responses
@Fulltank (2882)
• Philippines
25 Aug 12
We encountered different types of people everyday. Its a fact of life and we cant do anything about it. We can learn to avoid people like this simply because we don't want to hurt their feelings. But sooner or later, we have to face them every now and then. I think the best thing that we can do is to learn how to handle people who are sensitive. It can be very difficult and learning it may take us forever.
1 person likes this
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
25 Aug 12
that's right... we really meet different people who are different in many ways, that is right. oh i just wish i am able to help my friend at this stage in his life. :D i am sure he will be able to pull through this... i hope he does and i just want to be with him at this time...
@Raine38 (12257)
• United States
24 Aug 12
I know of a few friends who are sensitive when you have to say something that they didn't like; they always take it the wrong way and get hurt so bad that they end up not talking to me for a couple of days. Usually, I just say upfront first that what they did was fine, and I state first all the good points before I bring in the bad. Sort of like I try to make them feel better first before I bring in the "bad news". This isn't really my style, because with friends, I tend to be more upfront and straight and no beating around the bush. That doesn't mean that I am such a meanie that whatever I say will end up hurting them, no. These friends I refer to are just too darned sensitive to even listen constructively.
I don't know how else to deal with ultra sensitive people other than saving the bad stuff for later.
1 person likes this
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
25 Aug 12
Oh he has really been feeling down. i don't know. i have already asked for a back up and someone was helping me out with him already. I think he does need to be punched a bit so he'd wake up and stop feeling sorry for himself. he's been using the word moving on is hard for him and so on.. =(
@natliegleb (5175)
• India
2 Sep 12
i normally dont talk a lot with them ,i just keep ignoring them and keep moving away from them,since for petty and silly issues they keep worked out so much and it annoys me a lot
@echoforever (5180)
• United States
24 Aug 12
I have had this issue to deal with a sensitive person. Not like you are describing with her problems being big, usually she would be okay with problems in her life. What this person would really be sensitive to was anything that was criticism. Like for example we would say something about her singing (we were in a band) and not really in a bad way but trying to be constructive. Anythign we said that was not simple "that was good!" with anything added on... she would take really really hard.
How to deal with the one you're talking about, I am not sure? All you can do is try your best to boost his moral about the situations he is in. If he wishes not to accept that constructive help from you, there isn't much more you can do. It is something he must overcome too.
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
25 Aug 12
hi there echo forever. Thank you for your response it sure is a very goodadvice as to how i should try to react to him i will do my best to put up or bring up his morale. He is really feeling down to a point where he told me he feels he could nolonger take take it. Hence he kept me so worried about him.
As for your friend... I think that is odd or too much of her not to be able to take anything negative... In life we should really do our best to be best but it is just not possible that all people will be for us ecause there will always be thosr that does not like us... I hope she soon will find ut in her heart to undrrstand how life works. Hehe
@echoforever (5180)
• United States
25 Aug 12
Its true for both, I think. To feel so low is kind of harmful and the same thing in a way.
I think it is something each of our friends will have to learn with time for themselves. We can only help so much. Part of the healing process for them will have to come when they realize they are the main source of it.
1 person likes this
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
25 Aug 12
yes, that is right. =) i guess we can only do so much for a friend, they will really have to be able to do more for themselves and they ought to make themselves or help themselves pull up whatever they are drowned into. Yes we can be by their side, however they should be able to want to get better and feel better and not lose hope, right?
@Rohitt03011979 (249)
• India
24 Aug 12
Hello chiyosan!!i appreciate your feeling about your friend.it seems that he is very shy by nature.i think he has created a shell around himself and not allowing anybody to break this.if you know him well then try to make him remember about his loved ones.and if this doesnot work then being strong talk him a little rude.who knows might this work......
1 person likes this
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
25 Aug 12
thanks rohitt. i have been really trying hard to work out how to make him feel good about himself. i hope he does not give up just yet... =( but thank you for the advise, i am slowly starting to be talking ever strongly on him already so he'd get my point... he he i think he is too soft still... oh im going nuts!
@Rohitt03011979 (249)
• India
24 Aug 12
Hello chiyosan!!i appreciate your feeling about your friend.it seems that he is very shy by nature.i think he has created a shell around himself and not allowing anybody to break this.if you know him well then try to make him remember about his loved ones.and if this doesnot work then being strong talk him a little rude.who knows might this work......
