Help the vulnerable

Tweet

On the 4th October of this year, I called around to my elderly neighbour's apartment to see if I could walk her dog. She didn't get out very often, because her legs weren't strong, and usually went out on her pink mobility scooter that she affectionately named The Pink Panther. I knocked on her patio door, but got no response. I could see through the gap in the curtains that her bathroom light was on, and so I tried the door, expecting it to be locked, but it wasn't. I grabbed the dog, who was winding her way around my legs, stepped inside and called out my neighbour's name. There was no response, but I figured that she may be having a nap. I checked the bathroom, the door was wide open, and the light was on, but she wasn't in there, so I peeked into her bedroom quietly, in case she was napping. Instead, she was face-down on the floor at the side of the bed. It was obvious at a glance that she was dead. The next 30 minutes passed in a haze for me. I know I got my partner to call 991 for the paramedics. Given that it was classed as a sudden death, the RCMP responded too. I had to give a statement to the RCMP as a witness, but when they asked me for contact information for her family, I couldn't give it. I didn't know it. I knew she HAD family, 2 sons and a daughter, but I'd never met her sons, and only met her daughter once for maybe 20 minutes. The RCMP said they'd search for her family members. The very next day, we got a call from another RCMP officer asking for the same contact information. Again, we couldn't give it. As it turned out, the RCMP were unable to locate her family. 5 days later, on Thanksgiving Monday here in Canada, one of her son's knocked on my door asking if we'd seen his mom. I wasn't home at the time, and my ex-husband had to break the news to him that his mother had passed away 5 days before. Since this happened, I've struggled. I'm not sleeping well, and I've battled feelings of guilt that I should have checked on her more often. I knew she was elderly, I knew she had health issues, and just 3 or 4 days before she died, I'd told her she needed to see her doctor when she complained of not feeling well. But the whole situation really opened my eyes. How many elderly people do you know off the top of your head, that live alone, don't get out often, and don't have many visitors. How many of them do you think would welcome a little bit of conversation each day, someone who would call in, even if it's just for a few minutes to say hi, and make sure they have everything they need? For me, living in an apartment building, I know quite a few of them. As much as I wish things could have been different with my neighbour, she's now gone. But that doesn't mean that there aren't others out there. Could you give up an hour or so a day to check on an elderly person in your building or neighbourhood? WOULD you? Why, or why not?