Raise onother man child

South Africa
November 4, 2012 2:30pm CST
How would you feel if you could date a girl for 8 years and you have a 5 year old kid that you call yours. one day you find out thst the child is not yours. how woild you handle tha?
5 responses
@today2 (88)
• United States
4 Nov 12
Move one for the most part. Now if you and the kid have a emotional connection which I'm sure you might it will be difficult but I would get on my horse and move on. There are plenty of good women in the world without having to take on unnecessary problems. If she made a mistake and told you up front that is one whole other thing but to keep it for 5 years good bye. Then again you can hang on I can have the fellows come bye when you gone. I shouldn't say that, sorry. If you're trying to fix it and she is willing the get some counseling or something. But if you're going to snap then get out quick and find another girl or start dating again to get her out of your mind. That's all I have.
• South Africa
7 Nov 12
thsnks for the advise, i spriciste it
17 Nov 12
Hi siya573 I have been cheated on by a girl,it was 3 years down the line when I found out,and I must admit I did not deal with it very well,I tried to forgive and forget and 23 hours a day I would be fine but it was that one hour that tormented my soul and left me with a burning desire to even the score in some way and it usually struck when I went to bed,and it wasn't a very nice way to live. I feel very sorry for you as I could not imagine being told my 3 year old daughter is not mine,I think it would really mess my head up big time,but you need to be strong as life goes on and so must you,my best advice is make a decision and stick to it,no looking back and no regrets,keep moving forward and keep your head up good luck friend.
@leeandrew (1226)
• Philippines
9 Nov 12
It's definitely hard to accept, it is easier to break up with the girl but when you are close to the kid it's very hard for you to just them go. You might rather stay and forgive and forget or go away with a heavy heart. Honestly, that would be very hard thing.
• United States
7 Nov 12
Intially I would be very upset and have to take a walk or a road trip to get my emotions in check. Reason for this is I would want to have a clear mind to talk with the mother and find out how and why and what for's. One thing with all this to remember is that it is not the child's fault, so if you just walk away from that child that is hurting them more than anyone and all of you together. Have some good sit down talking and maybe get some professional help for each of you to get through the shock. Remember the child has no idea what this all means, they feel you are the parent regardless of the words that are spoken. You have been Father for 5 years.. put yourself in the child's place before making any rash and decisions.. feel what they would feel. then Stop, Think, Start...
@jenny1015 (13394)
• Philippines
5 Nov 12
That could be tough. But if you love both your partner and the kid, then anger should not reside in your heart. The important thing is that the three of you love one another and that your partner has been faithful to you since you became together.