I know i need to tell her i love you more
By laken02
@laken02 (3065)
United States
January 1, 2013 1:11am CST
what type person are you ? are you able to tell the ones you love .. " i love you"
i mean your family.. or do you find that hard to do ?
i do love my daughter but sometimes i have a hard time telling her ... i think it comes from my mom when i was growing up never telling me .. like when i met my x husbands family i noticed that every time we left there house they would hug him and me and say "I LOVE YOU" and my family mom and dad just did not do that..
and now i know i should be able to tell my daughter I love you more but its so hard for me.. and i hate that.. espically now that its just me and her and i know she needs to hear it more..
sometime i feel like she would be a better person if i was able to tell her every day '' I LOVE YOU " and not make her feel like my mom made me feel..
I do love her , even when she is at her worst.. but its hard for me to express myself to her..
i have two daughters she is the oldest and lives with me, my other one lives with her dad in her case my youngest i can say '" I LOVE YOU" to her when we talk on the phone before we hang up .. but not in person..
I have been thinking about this for awhile.. and just needed others opinion as to why i might not be able to say ''I LOVE YOU '' in person to my daughters i feel terrible.. espically for my oldest .. she has had such a hard time .. and i know she feels unloved .. when she tells me i love you mom .. i always say it back no problem .. but now that i am aware of the problem i want to fix it..
I would like my new years resolution to be to tell my kids every day that i love them and show them more that i care.. becasue i really do..
so starting tomorrow i am going to try my best to do better and express my love to my daughters.. and tell them I love you every day..
i know it will make a big difference in there lives.. and hopefully mine too
i too know what its like to feel unloved by family.. with the exception of one aunt on my dads side .. every time i call her before we hang up she will say "I love you"
and i really needed that.. seeing as i never heard it from my mom...
1 person likes this
10 responses
@sriroshan (2585)
• India
1 Jan 13
When you are in family you must try to understand other family members feeling too and it's become your's sort of duties to share your love with near & dear people.
I am working lady and even my hubby also go for job. I leave house early and return back also early. My hubby leaves for office late around 10 A.M. and come back late. But when he comes come I make a point to ask him what he want to have, i.e. coffee, tea or cold coffee and according prepare for him.
I share my love with my husband and children (son and daughter) equally, and make a point to share and ask them to share with me if they have any problem.
1 person likes this
@laken02 (3065)
• United States
1 Jan 13
thank you, i am glad that you and your family are close and have that wonderful relationship. i hope to one day have the same.. i did treat my husband they way you treated yours always doing things for him and such and it did not work out so grest for me we are now divorced .. i tryed to make it work but that was all i couod do.. so now its just me and my daughter and im trying to better our lives any way i can.. andi think its important to be able to let her know i love her and am there for her... every day..
@vinodkumar123 (50)
•
1 Jan 13
i love you not a bad words but person make a bad words for our use . so these thing is done between so many people like brother and sister , mother and daughter , father and son ,etc but this thing is done between boy and girl ,that is a bad thing, by i thing.
1 person likes this
@laken02 (3065)
• United States
1 Jan 13
hi i think everyone needs to feel loved.. i know when my husband well x now stopped telling me he loved me my whole world fell apart.. i still tryed for years to make it work but you cant make someone love you either so i finaly got the divorce and now its just me and my daughter and i regret not telling her i love her and now i want her to feel loved and know now that my family is gone as well
that she is still loved.. and try and build her self esteem ..
@laken02 (3065)
• United States
1 Jan 13
i think a hug is even better.. my daughter has very low self esteem.. im pretty sure if i tell her i love her more it will help her in alot of ways.. i just wish i did it sooner.. i want this to be the best year ever and it starts with me..
thanks and happy new years :)
@ARIES1973 (11426)
• Legaspi, Philippines
1 Jan 13
Hi laken!
I always made it a point to tell my husband, my son and my daughter how much I love them. I don't have a problem about this thing. Although, I have some experience with my mother not able to hear from her these words, I don't like it to happen to my own family.
Go on, show that love! It's a good start for a new year!
Happy New Year!
1 person likes this
@god_is_good (683)
• Philippines
3 Jan 13
I admire you for publicly admitting your inability to say those magic words to your daughters. As you start the new year, I know that you will muster all the courage to express those love through words. I agree a hundred percent that your daughters need to hear it more. I have learned that late in life but now, it becomes just an easy habit for me to say those words to my kids. I have read of a Daddy who always say to her daughter how he loves her. Before he would leave her to sleep, he would ask his daughter: "How does it feel to be 11 years old and loved by her daddy?" The daughter would say, "Great Dad." Then the Dad would say, "I love you and will always love you."
@sunshinesophie (794)
• China
1 Jan 13
I am from China.Most of parents are quite reticent and they choose to hide their real emotion in heart rather than speaking out though how much they love the children.As a child,I hope my mom can say to me I love you one day.I do know she loves me so much,all she did is for my better life.But I wish she can express her feeling directly.She must be shy to do that,lol.
But I would try my best to let her know I love her,sometimes when I talked to her by phone,I said Mom,I miss you so much.Though what I said to her is too sweet for her,she would be very happy in fact.
Saying I love you is not a very difficult thing actually,when it is spoken out,we can see how surprised and happy that person is.
Happy new year.
1 person likes this
@laken02 (3065)
• United States
1 Jan 13
you know i am a shy person tooo .. and i tend to hide my feeling alot as well but i dont want to make my daughter feel like your mom and my mom made us feel we both know they loved us .. but i know its important to hear.. and that is why i want to let my daughters know every day.. they are loved :)
@celticeagle (160056)
• Boise, Idaho
1 Jan 13
I don't recall hearing 'I Love You' very often from my mom either. I think it was a generational thing back then. And I remember 'the talk' was a little odd too. But my grandson tells me all the time and I am quick to return it. And I tell my daughter too. It is funny how kids can bring you together like that.
@kingparker (9673)
• United States
2 Jan 13
Wow, that is a big step, and I hope that your daughter understand that you really love her that much. Honestly, my parents never tell me that "They love me" every day, but from the bottom of my heart, I knew that they love me, really love me by their action, but not by words. I also hardly be able to express myself in words to tell them that I love them too. Anyway, that is a good way to let your daughter to know that, her mom really proud of her, and love her that much.
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
2 Jan 13
I grew up not hearing those words from both of my parents. but they do tell it to me when they send letters or cards. However, when I have become a mom, I did find myself saying those words to my kids easily. Most especially to my youngest who is very close to me. And how I wish that all my kids will learn to say those 3 simple words to their own kids in the future.
@pokumon (644)
• United States
2 Jan 13
I guess my parents were the same as yours and did not say I love you much especially when I lived with them. I don't really hear it from my dad, but my mom will say it on the phone with me. I know they both love me and miss me now that I am out of state, so I don't think it is really necessary to hear it from them every day. I feel bad because I should call them more often, but my dad really does not like to talk on the phone.
In relationships it normally takes me at least 5 months to fall in love. I am always afraid of saying I love you at first because I want the feelings to be reciprocated. So I tend to wait a while before saying it. The first time I ever said it was actually during a fight. I did not realize I loved him so much until we fought. I say it all the time with my current boyfriend and am very happy in our relationship. I remember the first time he said I love you to me.
I think it is even harder to say I love you to my siblings than my parents. I am unsure why. We are just a tacit bunch I guess.
