Do you care about what other people think?

@Aja103654 (5663)
Philippines
April 2, 2013 2:08am CST
Why are people care so much about what other people care about them? It is self-limiting and rather unhealthy. There is truly little benefit to caring what other people think. Though it can be useful to know what other people think so we can improve ourselves. Worrying what others might think about us through a bad rumor is not worth the time. It only brings unnecessary disturbance to our peace of mind and our hearts. My dad is experiencing now. he is worried that he might come out the bad guy because some person is talking bad about him to other people. Why does he even bother worrying about those pathetic losers think. it's bad for his heart. he has more problems to deal with and this people are adding up. I seriously am tempted to throw a molotov cocktail at those losers at the moment...
3 people like this
25 responses
@mjhalz8 (255)
• Philippines
2 Apr 13
I usually do. But somehow, I am trying not to be affected, but still their getting into my nerves. But as much as possible, I just want to be me, and don't mind others.
1 person likes this
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
3 Apr 13
It is tough. But with practice, it can be done. ^_^ It helps to focus things that are important and just ignore the silly rumors.
@dpk262006 (54032)
• Delhi, India
2 Apr 13
Hi! We just can not stop others, what they talk about us, so let it be. We have no means to stop them or brain wash their minds about ourselves. I do my jobs honestly and with sincerity and I care about others. I am least bothered what others think about me, because it is their outlook about me. I know there are always some jealous and negative people, who try to find faults with you or try to undermine you on the slightest opportunity or they even mockery of your deeds to the third parties. I think your Dad should not worry about rumors and gossip mongers, if he has not anything wrong and he is true, he should ignore such comments.
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
3 Apr 13
Yeay, deepak, you're back! Yes, that is true. I'm glad you are not affected by what other people think. It shows that you are secure as your own person and you have a clear mind. My dad has been having health problems and these annoying vermins are making it worse. My family even mentioned that we might move out to avoid these people. it has always been trouble some. There's this issue about our land and home ownership. I am not sure. But there's an obnoxious people out there who talk bad about my parents. What trash. I'd feed him bombs if I knew who he is.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (54032)
• Delhi, India
3 Apr 13
Thanks for the compliments Aja . I feel that a solution to the problem has to be found out if it is a recurring and persistent problem. Dispute about land/house could take away one's sleep. Although it is easier said than done, yet I would say - "Catch the bull by horns" and wipe out the problems (and persons).
• India
2 Apr 13
Hi aja. Well I feel the same as you do. Though I would not completely agree with you. There are certain people in my life about whom I always consider what they would think. Apart from them I do not worry what others think or feel about me. In fact I get irritated just like you because my girlfriend is very cautious and is always worried about what others think about her. And this makes me very angry again. Actually it is the lack of confidence in their abilities that makes them behave that way. Have a nice day !! SuperShames
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
3 Apr 13
If I have a partner or someone I love being bothered by such things. It makes me mad and ballistic. take good care of your girlfriend and always remind her of what is important. I was talking about other people that don't fit in our love scope. LOL. Sorry I wasn't being specific.
1 person likes this
• India
3 Apr 13
Hi aja. Yeah. I will definitely take good care of her. Not only that, I will also have to groom her and train her for this corporate world we are living in. If she remains this way, others would always make use of her and she will never succeed. Have a nice day !!
@babyeve (1051)
• Seychelles
2 Apr 13
I seriously don't care about what other people think. We all have our own ways of seeing things and to me, as long as it does not affect me in any way, I am cool with whatever they think. I try my best to stay in own quiet little corner and live my life as simple as possible to avoid necessary stress.
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
3 Apr 13
Haha, it is best to avoid unnecessary stress. People should learn how to do this.
@babyeve (1051)
• Seychelles
3 Apr 13
Yes we should all learn to do so at some point. :)
• Italy
2 Apr 13
You are right, caring about what other people think is pointless: You live for having others approval but you don't enjoy your life. Also, whatever decision you do, there will be always someone judging in some way, for example if you are too good, they say you'are too good, if you are bad they say you're too bad, so the most intelligent thing to do is understanding what is truly the best for us and doing it without giving importance to people opinion. This doesn't mean we have to disrespect others, but at the same time we can't be truly free if we are thinking to what others think..
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
3 Apr 13
That's exactly it. You worded it better than I did. Being independent and being confident in ourselves also involves not letting other people's negative opinion about us affect our self-worth and affect us in any negative way. One simple truth to accept is: We can't please everyone no matter how hard we try. So we only need to do what is right and what is best.
• Italy
3 Apr 13
Well said :D
@grvdubey11 (1882)
• India
2 Apr 13
Well we are designed to be emotional,that is why opinion of people matters to us.So its better to be emotional towards family members and may be very close friends,while for rest of the people its best not to care,easier said than done though, but with some practice and self control it can be achieved.Best wishes.
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
3 Apr 13
Ever since I was young, I am a natural at not caring about what other people think. It's liberating, and I enjoy my life that way. Other people are useless when they only want to talk you down and make you feel bad. It is natural to care what those who are close to us think about us, because we know that they only want what is best for us and would not want to destroy us. but other people, che, who cares about them?
• India
3 Apr 13
Yes one should neither care nor give any attention to such people.They just want to upset you and if you get upset it eventually helps their cause.Like the great George Bernard Shaw once quoted,never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.
@roshigo58 (4871)
• Pune, India
2 Apr 13
Hi, We have to think about what other people think about us because we are living in the society where we want to be considered as a good human being. But there are some people who are jealous of us and spread some rumors about us and try to damage our image. If we are honest then we don't have to care about others. the truth can not be hide for long days. So we should continue our life without fear of other people.
@SIMPLYD (74967)
• Philippines
2 Apr 13
I totally agree with you roshigo. That's why , we sometimes think of how we are perceived by others and try our best to maintain that image. But when others would try to destroy that image by spreading rumors, for me we shold confront those persons. Because if you don't they might think that you are beaten.
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
3 Apr 13
Sometimes, no matter how hard we try to be good, people will still try to find faults and that can accept a lot of us. that is why, I think it is almost completely useless to let other people's opinion affect us. We don't have any reason to please them. What matters is how we see ourselves and we uphold to the image we want for ourselves, not for others. I think if people want to destroy my image, I can simply ignore them because they are not worth my time. What they are actually doing is ruining themselves, because no good person would destroy other people's image for the sake of it.
• India
2 Apr 13
we can not close people's mouth, so we should not care about what they say behind... sometimes when bad smells comes in somewhere we just cover our nose with a tissue and across till bad smells finish... that is same when people talk like that then we should not involve ourself in that ,,,, just let it go...
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
3 Apr 13
Haha! That's an awesome analogy!
@jricky1 (6809)
• China
2 Apr 13
We need consider ourself as well and we are living for ourselves isn't for them.So i always remind myself.Many people are realizing i believe.Helpful for us and nice hearing your discussions and making senses.Good day.
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
3 Apr 13
Thank you too jricky! We live our life for ourselves, not for them. So we really should not seek to find approval from people who don't even truly care about us.
@dagami (1163)
• Rome, Italy
2 Apr 13
if a person lives alone in an island, self sufficient and happy with the situation, then what the rest of the world think about him wouldn't matter to him. unfortunately, this isn't so. our actions cause corresponding reactions in our society, especially within the family circle. we cannot ignore this since in a sense we influence the lives of the people we love, our family and friends. we should always take into consideration this aspect if we want harmony in our lives. worrying about what the rest of society would say to the point of limiting our decisions/activities for fear of being ostracized is not healthy. we can never make everyone happy. there is always someone who will always be at odds with us. this is society. this is life. only politicians are compelled to be mindful of what the society thinks about them. this is survival for them. if they cannot please as much voters as they ca, it'll be the end of their careers. the rest of us should live our lives doing what is we think is best for us and our families. as long as we don't go out intentionally hurting other people, what others woulde say shouldn't matter.
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
3 Apr 13
I meant those people who are not close to us, those nosy people who seek to destroy our reputation and believe whatever rumor without even considering finding facts that will prove it. People who are close to us are important, so it is essential to hear them out. They can give us negative evaluations, but it should be used to better ourselves and reflect our behaviors. That's right. About it being unhealthy and that is important for politicians to care. Like I said, it is useful for some people with a certain job, but not for everyone especially if it limits them.
@jenny1015 (13394)
• Philippines
2 Apr 13
I used to be the person who is afraid of doing things for fear of being judged. But come to think of it, whether you do something good or bad, people won't stop talking about you. So why care? The most important thing is you know that you are doing right and the people close to you knows what is the truth. Now if these gossips may affect a career or profession, well, it could be painful, but hey, there really is no stopping these people to get you down once they see an opportunity.
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
3 Apr 13
Fighting them back and defending ourselves is not the best way to deal with them. It only makes matters worse if we do. People have this crab mentality, that's so obnoxious and petty.
@quieley (319)
• Philippines
2 Apr 13
It depends. If that person is a love one, or someone who cares for me, that's okay, as long as what he/she thinks is good for me. But usually, when I'm in a crowd or conscious of how I look, I'm not so particular about what they think. I believe that no one can make me feel inferior without my consent :)
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
3 Apr 13
That's a good attitude quieley.
@franne32 (696)
• Philippines
2 Apr 13
I understand how you feel. That happened to my mom as well but karma took a turn for the worst against those who spread rumors about her and now they are paying big time for it. You see, it's better to let them think how they want because we know who is doing the right thing and sooner or later the truth will be revealed anyway. Now my mom is doing okay and those who believed her side are glad that everything is alright.
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
3 Apr 13
I am glad your mom is fine now. And it also gives me a satisfactory feeling about how those nosy people suffered the consequences. yeah. I don't see why people let themselves be bothered so much what other people think when they know that they have done nothing wrong whatsoever. those people who jump to conclusions don't deserve an explanation because it seems they are convinced with their own stories to even listen.
@Avijit100 (874)
• India
2 Apr 13
OMG! A Molotov Cocktail? God save the ones who think about you Well on a serious note, I do care at times of what people think but I don't overdo it, just for the initial few mins and then it's all gone.
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
3 Apr 13
Haha, yeah! I need to research how to make a molotov... just in case. It is not bad to want to know what other people think about us. It is a way to evaluate ourselves. But the most important thing is self-evaluation. We do what is right, no matter what, never mind what other people think. They are just nosy people who have nothing else to do other than spread useless rumors to please themselves. They are not the type of people whose opinions we should care about. Those low-life
@srisahara (4099)
• Indonesia
2 Apr 13
I think it is important to care with what people say about us, but we have to control it, don't consider all their thinking, it will hurt us, but choose some of them that useful for us and bring us be better. If all others thinking just want to drop down us, I think we have to get rid it, even consider that they are not human...!!!
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
3 Apr 13
It is complicated. I am really bothered that my father is affected so much. He worries what other people will think of him. Um, hello? No matter how hard we try to be good, we should not expect others to care. All we need is to acknowledge ourselves and know in our hearts that God is with us, our conscience is clear so there is nothing to be guilty about, there is no reason to CARE about what other people think if it will only seek to destroy us.
@allknowing (55185)
• India
2 Apr 13
It all depends how independent one is of society. If opinions of others affect your survival then those opinions matter. There are situations where people are ostracised merely because of the rumors doing the rounds. If one can stand the ground then these things do not count. But are you ready. It takes time and maturity to ignore what other people think about you. I have overcome all that and I can move on giving a deaf ear to what others think about me.
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
3 Apr 13
At a young age, I have learned that thinking about what other people think doesn't do good if it will only make you feel about yourself. it helps to know what other people think sometimes if it's related to your job and stuff, but other than that, what other people think about me is their business and it should not affect me negatively.
• Indonesia
21 Apr 13
Yeah you are right, it's not benefited to think what others think about you. But if bad rumors affect your advancement. Like those bad rumors in the office which affect your carrer and stuff, it'll make you at least care about the bad reputation which caused by bad rumors.
• United States
5 Apr 13
Hi! I sort of care what others think though it depends on the person and if I know them. You are right, you shouldn't get bent out of shape about every single thing you do and what people think or say about it as that way of thinking does hinder you from having a happier life. As for your Dad, I am sorry for what he is going through as I know it is not fun to be the victim. Can he have someone get him the talk of what is being said? Not to make the situation any worse but so perhaps he can do something about it; hence getting rid of some (if not all) the anxiety. Some people have nothing better to do than to spread malicious gossip about others for whatever reason just because they can and it gives them a sense of control. Hope it'll work out! Give your Dad a hug!
@cherigucchi (3943)
• Philippines
5 Apr 13
There are times that we are affected by what others think and say about us especially if these are coming from the people that we do really care about. However, later on we would soon realize that if its destroying our inner self, it is time that we need to reconsider the consequences on relying too much on what others think. If what they say or think are constructive and would make us even better, i believe it is just fine but if its not, we can trash them out right away.
@namiya (1599)
• Philippines
4 Apr 13
When i was younger I worry on how some people would think about me but as I grow older I realized that it is impossible to please everybody for others would always find faults with you. Now, I just do what I like and think is right and as long as I am aware that I don't step on someone else, I don't worry how some people would assess or think about me. People who know you will just not believe what others say against you and most probably these will backfire on the persons who are making up unfavorable stories for I had observed that those who are fond of criticizing people are the ones who have most insecurities in life.