can a soap opera ruin a relationship

April 15, 2013 12:45pm CST
I love my soaps and my other tv dramas. I can't help but wonder if the passion people feel for eachother on tv is making me rethink my relationship. On tv they fall in love and have such a passion, a real connection to each other. I've been married for a long while now and am missing those feelings you have when you 1st meet someone and fall madly in love. I know it sounds lame but thats just how I'm feeling. In real life do people really have that kind of passion ? Should you accept what you have and just live through the tv characters? Should you go out and find or make your own passsion? I get that the tv shows are all fake and made up.
2 people like this
13 responses
• Canada
23 Apr 13
Yes, I would say that if taken out of their context as simple entertainment then they can ruin a relationship. There is another discussion about soap operas that is relevant to this I just saw which asks the question: "do soap operas make me people unrealistic and overdramatic?" I would say the answer to this is "yes" as well. The primary viewing demographic for soap operas is a woman aged 16-65, so I would say this age group is most likely in a relationship while viewing the soap opera programs. I have never been in a relationship with a woman who watches soap operas because I am simply not attracted to this generic format of a person, so then again, I am purely speculating on this topic.
23 Apr 13
I just commented on another topic, it was about why don't women go ahead and get a divorce. I said I was content in my marriage but wondering if this is really as good as it gets. It is similar to this. Do you settle for what you have or do you go out and try to find some passion in your life? Passion like yes in soaps, but alsomovies, tv, music, and the way we felt as teens. The viewing age of 16-65 is a bit worrying to me. That means a lot of women are watching soaps, most likely living through them b/c they are lacking something in their own lives. A bit worried that I will be feeling a lack of something for years and years to come.
• Canada
23 Apr 13
Just remember that soap operas contain a lot of negativity and surrealism. Most relationships are grounded in reality. If you or your partner are worried about this then maybe it is a sign you should go take up an exciting hobby like skydiving or bungee jumping? Or maybe become part of a neighbourhood watch vigilante group? Soap operas and all fictional television programs are designed as an escape from reality, not a means of living in one. Remember that for the same reason dragons don't fly in the sky and you aren't an elf with magical powers, that these shows are make believe and don't apply to your day to day occurrences. Best of luck.
• Philippines
16 Apr 13
Soap operas are just product of imagination but some are also based on the writers' experience. So you can say that it is half true. If you want to experience the same passion shown on tv, then you have to go out, meet people, interact, enjoy and love. The best way not to experience it is to drown yourself with tv shows.
16 Apr 13
If that kind of passion is unattainable wouldn't be better to live through the tv shows? I like scary movies but I will not be putting myself in danger anytime soon.
• Philippines
16 Apr 13
yes, only if you want to watch your life away rather than living it.
• United States
15 Apr 13
If your waiting for that kind of passion then trust me you have a very long wait. It is VERY rare that that sort of passion exist if ever. I mean think about how these soap operas really are. Yes they have these incredible loving, passionate storylines but just how often do these characters stay together without something or someone taring them apart? If we lived our lives like that we would be exhausted all the time & all of us would probably be on Prozac. That's not to say that real love doesn't exist though. I love my husband with my whole entire heart, but even so our marriage like any marriage takes a lot of work. We have huge fights & then we have days where we act like a couple of teenagers in love. There were times when I had to wonder though if we were going to make it because we are so different in so many ways. That's when I try to imagine my life without him in it & what it would be like. For me it would be unbearable because no matter how many fights we may have when it comes down to it I love him & he loves me. That's what makes everything else worth it, knowing that come what may we both wont quit & we will do whatever we have to do to stay together. To me THAT'S real love & not the junk that you see on TV.
15 Apr 13
Don't we kind of live our lives like that anyway? There is always someone divorcing, cheating, having a mid life crisis. I know that the passion doesn't last but why not move on to the next? Maybe as teenagers we had it right. I think most people get married or stay married b/c they know they are not alone. So we give up romance and passion for security and comfort?
• United States
17 Sep 13
No , I wont watch =]
• India
23 Apr 13
Hi friend, some TV serials and movies are based on the real life incidents, love at first sight is possible, but in this modern days most of the love are lust, so it is hard to find this kind of real love.
• Philippines
16 Apr 13
I don't like it when people relate too much of their life on what they watch on those soap operas. At first, they are made to entertain us. If they don't spice up the show with too much suspense or any other non realistic but heartwarming and breath taking scenes, the show will be boring and not much people will watch it. I know someone who even copy the actions and wordings of his idol and it's a major turn off. He's losing his own identity and acting weird. Life is simple and mysterious but not much twist on it. We can get lessons from what we watch but not our own identity or character. We are all made unique.
@joizee (502)
• Philippines
16 Apr 13
Ha, that's a very good thought since I am fond of soap operas too. Soap operas affect me to the point of I relate my own life to the "fictional reality" on TV. When the show really interests me, I usually have haunting questions about the show. Why is the story like this? Is it still fictional or are they trying to show reality here? Or they want to set an example for people to be like the characters or the story itself? Do soap operas have the purpose of changing and affecting lives and relationships? Just like children copying cartoons' fight scenes, do adults copy what they see in soap operas, especially to those who can "relate" to the story. So I do believe soap operas may have an effect to relationships one way or the other, as long as they get affected by whatever that may be. :)
@tinayu (214)
• China
16 Apr 13
i think that kind of real passion or hot love does not or hardly exist in the real life.i always be moved by the fascinating stories of the soaps.but i distinctly know that just stories.in a soap,what the male and female need to do is just falling in love.every other things are only to pave the way for them.but in reality,that must be unpractical.
• India
16 Apr 13
ya in very rare cases it can. . if a person gets highly obsessed by it and starts connecting his or her life to it in great extent then it can ruin :-(
• India
16 Apr 13
ya in very rare cases it can. . if a person gets highly obsessed by it and starts connecting his or her life to it in great extent then it can ruin :-(
@kukueye (1761)
• Malaysia
16 Apr 13
TV can destrosy relationship - TV dramas cause people to not spent time together.
Yes of course any distraction whether is soap opera, internet chat , and others can really ruin a relationship. Nowsdays even people going for dating will use their smartphone online to watch youtube , play game , check email . Rather then talking communicating with each other they are busy with themselves. This is same also at home when have meals can talk but watch tv infront of the dinnig table and hence destroy the relationship development.
@cttolledo (5047)
• Philippines
16 Apr 13
I know that could be possible to relate your real life story to a soap story since they are all based on experience and observation of the writer.. because their main intention is to make that soap related to to the real life story to encourage the viewers to watch it. But we should not forget that soap is a kinda OA sometimes, you can observe a little bit of exaggeration to the character and scene, So we are all smart and educated people so its up to us to be affected by such soap and not...
• United States
15 Apr 13
Soap Operas are just soap operas. Pure entertainment. You can have passion in your relationship tho. Both of you just have to work at getting back to what really made you happy to be together in the first place. Then who knows you just might have more passion that what you see on tv. Just because you've been married for a long time doesn't mean it can't be passionate. Express your feelings to your spouse. You might be surprised at the results.