I am reserved type person absolutely

Chennai, India
August 4, 2014 11:04am CST
Hai, I agree, I was a reserved type person. To clarify how, I can say few things about me. I struggle hard to spoke in a group of new persons. Earlier in school days and college days, I shut my mouth tightly in regards to express my views openly among them. But if I was speaking in a group of well known friends, I can view my thoughts easily but it is also limited to certain point. Strangely, I can speak to my mother and sister without any fear and was quit talkative to both of them, but I was absolutely reserved to my father and if my father is present, I became totally silent to everyone whom are I well know. This is because of my fear to talk to my father and it has been persist since childhood. I recently got married to a girl who is outspoken and in fact she overcome me in several occasions in regards of being silent person (me). Her voice is so harsh/loud. She is too bold, never care about new persons and she can speak nonstop. I felt I was too weak in that situation. She even on many times scold me about my silent nature and advise me to speak loudly. Not even she but also my father did the same. She in fact not completed +2, but she has good wealth, but I do not needed those wealth at all. She and my father are same type, scolding often others and I was concerned about when they scolds me. In recent past 2 days, I had come across some suicidal idealization, as I believe, I was worthless and there is no use of living in this world. But this thought comes only few times in the recent 6 months. Currently, I am working as medical transcriptionist for the past 5 years (home based). At sometime, I felt alone and missing people to interact. For that reason, I wish to change my career to teaching. But I doubt, if I can succeed in that. Now please advise me after reading this short notes. Thanks
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