Joint Family Or Nuclear Family?
@Kchitij2007 (445)
Pune, India
2 responses
@vandana7 (99107)
• India
26 Sep 15
I am for smaller families. There are three reasons for this. a) We live in fast world with more materialistic choices than ever before. b) interests of the family and nation would be better served with smaller families because responsibilities and duties can be pin pointed more accurately to the family, which decreases the scope of others feeling intimidated because of larger family. c) smaller families are less risky for children.
Now a) It increases desires and need to keep up with joneses. This forces the lady to join work force. There is less time to reflect upon everything. Everybody wants gratification of their needs and desires..fast. That makes for family squabbles. Not worth it.
b) If the family were to gang up against a single person, it can be a problem. If that single person is right, soon wrong becomes the system, because of fear, and more bullying follows. If families are nuclear, then we can exercise social pressures. In fact, just like the country distributes responsibilities to States, and States to cities, and cities to regions for any betterment of people, the responsibility of people is to offer law abiding useful citizens to the country. Any failure on the part of the family should entail some monetary punishment because government subsidizes many things for fulfillment of that responsibility. We are material or resources for the nation. But that is my opinion. I may be wrong.
c) There is more scope for pedophiles to enjoy what they enjoy if families are joint. It is difficult to stand up against any pedophile within the family because of the risk it entails for the good name of the child and in general support form the society. The society in the east still believes joint family is good, forgetting that many crimes occur within the families. Sometimes heirs are killed for the sake of properties.
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@Kchitij2007 (445)
• Pune, India
26 Sep 15
responding to you pointwise:
a) Almost every lady in the urban scenario is working ( right from maids to CEOs ), that is due to financial and motivational reasons guided by increasing women empowerment and i feel has less to do with the type of family one has ( a case in point, we live in joint family with my grand parents and my mother is working from before she even got married ). Squabbles due to non-fulfillment of desires can even happen ( and does happen ) between kids and their parents so i don't think Joint family takes a loss for that point.
b) exact opposite of that could happen too! any friction between any two members can be eliminated by other members in the form of guidance and compromise. Plus for working couples with a baby on the way, joint family system can be such a boon in helping bring up the child and be carefree as there are his grandparents or uncles to take care of him/her. Plus, the upbringing is complete with the fusion of traditional values and modern thinking, something that gives him/her a better perspective of right and wrong.
c) Heirs killed for property, would still be ( sadly enough ) killed because they would still be heirs of the property whether they are living in joint family with the culprit or not and also bcoz the culprit will still be greedy for the same reason. As for pedophiles, I don't think it is apt to correlate a family system with the presence of criminal elements since it has more to do with the sick mentality of an individual rather than the sickness being a consequence of the family system. Pedophiles have been equally able to perform their nefarious deeds despite them being complete outsiders. It has to do with the mentality and the sickness therein than Joint family system being at fault. Alert parents and children is the solution to that not nuclear families.
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@vandana7 (99107)
• India
26 Sep 15
@Kchitij2007 ..I meant
a) The blame will be on joint family. I am earning so much more than that person, but I am not getting to wear even this much. Why should you only be responsible? Why can't we have a separate place to stay, blah blah.
b) I think this point you misunderstood. When a family member wrongs outsiders, the entire joint family stands behind the wrong. Family feuds that go on for generations emerge this way. But if it is not family feud, such joint family becomes something to be feared and allowed to get away with more wrongs, effectively giving social sanctity to the wrong. They are always like this type.
c) Statistics reveal that most of such things (about pedophile's nefarious activities) happen within close relatives and friends. Outsiders expect some reactions so tend to keep away unless the child is vulnerable in some way.
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@Kchitij2007 (445)
• Pune, India
26 Sep 15
@vandana7
a) That seems more like personal ambitions overwhelming a person. Sure joint family means more spending on others staying with you, but then in a joint family everyone understands a person's means and desires and thus asks and gives accordingly. Unless ofcourse its a saas-bahu serial 
b) Ok that's just a generalization made from ( i'm hoping not so ) personal experiences. Because i have not witnessed nor felt any such thing ( which could be due to my young age, so you might be right ).
c) Yes those statistics are true but if i may point out that those friends and close relatives aren't always living with the family and hence not part of the Joint Family ( they just frequent the victim's place for obvious reasons ). Children are quite vulnerable for most of the time of the day when in schools, during commute or playing outside.
b) Ok that's just a generalization made from ( i'm hoping not so ) personal experiences. Because i have not witnessed nor felt any such thing ( which could be due to my young age, so you might be right ).
c) Yes those statistics are true but if i may point out that those friends and close relatives aren't always living with the family and hence not part of the Joint Family ( they just frequent the victim's place for obvious reasons ). Children are quite vulnerable for most of the time of the day when in schools, during commute or playing outside.1 person likes this
@arthurchappell (45002)
• Preston, England
23 Sep 15
nuclear families are more 20th century than 21st. There are more people living alone, single parent families, single gender parented families, etc. - the standard patterns and averages have dissolved away.
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