Can Your Posterior Survive Genetic Modification ?
By Gus Kilthau
September 27, 2015 8:40pm CST
Oh, I understand that some folks believe in that "man from monkeys" stuff and that others believe that the believers are plumb nutty, but I have come across photographic evidence that elephants used to be horses. How does THAT grab you? Those of us who are scientifically and historically advantaged tend to consider that photos don't lie - not unless you plop them down onto a tabletop or the like. Photographs are what are called "the straight skinny." As to the evolution of elephants from horses, it is all right there. Some people started to feed their horses fat food - like oats soaked in cow butter - chocolate candy bars - carrots in cream sauce - you know, the good stuff. Little did those feeder people know that everything a horse ate would go straight to their legs and snouts. Critter feeding works that way, not the way ignorant horse owners thought that horses' digestions work. As the legs got fatter and the snouts got longer, Monsanto scientists were contacted to find out if their gene modification methods might allow the horse feeder people to continue being sweet to their now fat-legged critters without giving them even fatter legs and longer snouts. No way ! Monsanto scientists told them that there was no such help available from Monsanto unless the horse feeder people had no objections to terrible things happening to the rear ends of anyone who thereafter sat atop a genetically modified horse. But, there it is. The photo of the midway point of the evolution of the elephant from the common horse. Call it a HorsaPhant if you like. Science is grand - and Nature is natural. Ask any HorsaPhant owner. They will all tell you that their evolved critters can run like the wind and carry multi-ton loads at the same time. Feed them Milky Way candy bars and Oreo cookies and they will live forever and never forget anything - not ever. Image source - My Broderbund DVD with a bit of cosmetic editing to brighten the colors