Concessions and My Day

@just4him (116780)
Green Bay, Wisconsin
January 9, 2016 9:00pm CST
Today has been a very bad day. Some of you might be aware that me and my older son have issues and can't live together. Yet he came and asked me if he could come back a few days ago. He was kicked out of his place because he's going to have surgery and his roommate didn't think he would be able to come up with the rent. So knowing things could go bad, and knowing he had nothing else, I said yes. Since he moved back I've been making one concession after another. With a dead computer I was using my laptop in the living room. He needed his sleep so I had to move. I moved to the kitchen, but that proved useless, and decided to try the office. We had gotten into an argument about my using the office and he said he could find a way to put everything in my office into a neat and orderly fashion. I don't take too well to people ordering my life. As it is I am in the office and it's not the best of situations for me at present. I keep blowing a fuse. I've unplugged everything I can in here just to be able to work in here. Now to give you an idea of what I dealt with this morning - I need a light on in order to work. The overhead has a short and doesn't work so I have a lamp on my desk that is bright and works perfect for me. The doorway to the office is the living room where he sleeps. He doesn't like the light because he said it's too bright and wanted me to turn it off or find a dimmer one. Yes, I blew my own circuit board this morning. I have conceded at every turn. I was angrier than I have been in a long time. I was ready to throw him out again, and even suggested that, but he came back with the fact he had nowhere else to go. I grabbed my jacket and hat and left. I was gone for two hours calming down. Yes, I conceded once again. I stopped at Family Dollar and bought a blackout curtain to put over the doorway to the office. I need to buy one more as it doesn't fit all the way across. I then moved the lamp on my desk so he couldn't see it. If I have to concede one more thing, I might end up in prison. Needless to say I've been depressed and crying most of the day. My younger son needed his sleep because he works tonight and we were arguing at the top of our lungs. He yelled at both of us. That's when I just left for two hours and tried to find a place I could just park the car and calm down. It's going to be a long three months, as I'm estimating how long he's going to be here. He's having hernia surgery next month. Then I blew a circuit in here. He had left, my son was asleep, and I couldn't work for two hours. Not a good day. Sorry to bring you my sad tale of woes. I hope yours has been much better. Thanks for reading.
8 people like this
8 responses
@LadyDuck (156953)
• Switzerland
10 Jan 16
You are conceding too much, your son is testing you, if you give he will ask more. Be careful, very careful, or you will no more be free in your home.
4 people like this
@GardenGerty (99194)
• United States
10 Jan 16
I think both @Dena91 and @LadyDuck are correct. It is your house, your son is very rude. He could pay for the blackout curtains. He could even try to help rewire things if need be. Writing is your work, you need to be able to work.
4 people like this
@just4him (116780)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
10 Jan 16
I'm already not free in my own home .
1 person likes this
@just4him (116780)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
10 Jan 16
@GardenGerty I agree, but he won't. Rewiring is going to take more money than I have at the moment. With the house in foreclosure, it might not be feasible to do it.
1 person likes this
@TRBRocks420 (77383)
• Banks, Oregon
10 Jan 16
I hope tomorrow is a better day sorry to hear about that, on the bright side Packers play tomorrow.
3 people like this
@just4him (116780)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
10 Jan 16
Yes they do. I looked it up before I blew the circuit and found out what time.
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (99194)
• United States
10 Jan 16
Old Houses are hard to deal with. I was there. Sharing a house with other adults can be terrible. I have done both of those. Does he work during the week? He will need lots of extra sleep while he recovers from the surgery. I do not understand the roommate, though. It would be better to keep someone who will at least try to come up with rent than have no one there at all and KNOW there would be no rent.
2 people like this
@just4him (116780)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
10 Jan 16
He's only working part time right now during the week because he is in a lot of pain from the hernia. I don't understand a lot of things and it's aggravating the daylights out of me.
1 person likes this
@Dena91 (4212)
• United States
10 Jan 16
I hope you don't mind this but your son needs to grow up. He ought to be thanking you that you allowed him to move in with you while he has his surgery and recovers. That is your home not his. Unless he is contributing to the mortgage, taxes, water, lights and food and what ever other bills there are, he needs to be quiet. I really have no tolerance for disrespectful people of any age. Praying things will get better for you. Hoping things are better today. Have a blessed day
2 people like this
@just4him (116780)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
10 Jan 16
No, he's not contributing anything and that makes it doubly hard. I hope things are better today as well.
1 person likes this
@jstory07 (66957)
• Roseburg, Oregon
10 Jan 16
Is there a library that you can go to for a couple hours each day. Here all you need is a card and you can stay on for two hours and longer if no one else is around.
1 person likes this
@just4him (116780)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
10 Jan 16
There is. We have only an hour for the computer, and we have meters to pay as well for the time we're there. Not the best option, but worth looking into if things keep going as bad as they did today.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (99194)
• United States
10 Jan 16
@just4him Even if you take your own laptop? Wow. On days I go to our old town while hubby works I take my laptop and hang for the entire day. I would be limited to two hours on their computer, but on my own there is no limit.
1 person likes this
@just4him (116780)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
10 Jan 16
@GardenGerty I never thought about taking it with, though I would need to take the cord as well. I can't work without it.
@mom210 (6762)
• Atlanta, Georgia
11 Jan 16
I would lay out some rules, if you are staying here, this is how it is going to go.
1 person likes this
@just4him (116780)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
11 Jan 16
The rules have been laid, but ignored.
1 person likes this
@mom210 (6762)
• Atlanta, Georgia
12 Jan 16
@just4him perhaps after he recovers from his surgery he will be smart enough to go find another place.
1 person likes this
@just4him (116780)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
16 Jan 16
@mom210 We had a 'talk' about that yesterday. After his surgery he will need to get back to work to earn money so he can get out and find another place, so it won't be right away.
1 person likes this
@Jessicalynnt (47854)
• Centralia, Missouri
10 Jan 16
I hope you find ways to work things out. maybe let him sleep in the office, since it's a room, and you use the living room?
1 person likes this
@just4him (116780)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
10 Jan 16
It was a bedroom at one time, and I had my office in the living room, but when he moved out the last time, I got everything in the office and now it would be impossible to move it all back, not to mention the bed I had, I no longer have it went to the curb a year ago. So the only thing he has to sleep on is the couch.
2 people like this
• Centralia, Missouri
10 Jan 16
@just4him gotcha, I hope something works out soon for ya'll
1 person likes this
@just4him (116780)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
10 Jan 16
1 person likes this
@Elizaby (3657)
• Pensacola, Florida
10 Jan 16
When you feel the slightest bit of anger rising what you need to do is to remove yourself from the situation, go to your prayer closet and ask the Lord to show you how to handle things in His nature. God is there waiting for you to lay it at His feet
1 person likes this
@just4him (116780)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
10 Jan 16
I had counseling this past week and when the pastor asked me what he could pray for me about I told him patience regarding my son. I had no idea I would need so much yesterday. I did leave and got away from here for a couple hours. It was strained when I returned. It's still strained.
1 person likes this