What should I tell her?

@ricki_911 (19950)
Toronto, Ontario
January 19, 2016 11:09am CST
My friend I had posted about her before here, and this guy. Now I sort of forgot about it honestly as I was working all the time. She was semi seeing this guy, the guy what I can see with their actions is shy and nervous around her. They got in afight last summer (I am not 100% what it was about) as neither would really go into details This guy would show up places, he knows noone in this area (he lives about an hour from her house). She has passed him a few times driving. He would slow down, and watch in his rear view mirror at her. I was with her a few times when they bumped in together. We were in the grcoery store his friend was him, and making a big scene. Basically trying to get her attention, and very immature in that sense. Hix ex was threatening my friend, and when she mentioned it to him, he then ignored her for a week. Yet, would keep showing up places where she was or her work but wouldn't say anything. This guy would add her to facebook, then delete her then repeat. So I kept her busy over the summer months and we did different events. I think she really needed this, and got her out not thinking about this guy. Around Thanksgiving I was driving her car into town with her in the car. She hates driving in the winter, so we were driving down the street. I thought this is weird this old classic car was following us, then backs off, then follows close. I realized it was this guy but never said anything to her. I thought maybe if I messaged the guy, he is always nervous around her and he literally can't have a conversation. But if it is someone else, he said to me over facebook he is not interested. Well why can't he simply say that that her, and why get all nervous showing up place. I had a chat with his friend and he insists he is interested, but shy. Well there is a line to this. I asked him when he messaged back saying it took a year to get a date out of her, and I don;t know half of it. When I asked to explain because there is always two sides to a story, and he then stopped messaging me but kept reading the messages. Now for me if I am not interested in someone I wouldn't read messages and not saying anything. I would simple say it to them end of story. Last week she got a voicemail with some guy saying how this guy is still interested but doesn't know how to say it. I messaged him when we got together this past weekend, and he read the messages but didn't reply. I told her to message his friend and see what he says. I met this friend and he is a very outspoken person. He is not saying anything and avoiding it.
3 people like this
4 responses
@GardenGerty (104004)
• United States
19 Jan 16
She needs to forget about him. He cannot make up his mind to anything.
1 person likes this
@ricki_911 (19950)
• Toronto, Ontario
20 Jan 16
I said that awhile back, and when I messaged him on facbeook (thinking maybe he would say something to me). He claimed he wasn;t interested, so I said why not say that to her. He will read the messages but not reply.
• United States
19 Jan 16
Honestly he sounds like a scary stalker and has so much on his hands though! I'd avoid him at all costs. He lives a hour away why does he have so much time popping up?? Just to see her and say nothing. What a waste!!
@ricki_911 (19950)
• Toronto, Ontario
20 Jan 16
That is what I said. I thought at first he lived in the area and thought coincidence. Found out later he lived 45 minutes to an hour away. She has bumped into him at Walmart, and a local grocery story with his friend. His friend would be talking loudly to get her attention and she told me his friend would be like look there she is. He even came into her work a few times. Back in the summer I told her why not take time to yourself and enjoy the summer. Well she saw him a few times, then around thanksgiving she saw him going to town. I was with her the time after, and thought who the f is this following us. But it's not like he will say anything or creepy stalker (or I would picture) I told her does he know your schedule, but her schedule is all over the place. Yet, this past weekend I messaged him while we went to this party. He read it but didn't say anything. He told me around Christmas when I messaged him thinking maybe he would say something to me (as he isn't trying to impress me), and he said I am not interested but would read every message after but not reply. I told him then why not just say that to her face.
1 person likes this
• United States
20 Jan 16
@ricki_911 When you messaged him on Facebook, did you tell him that you can see when he reads the message. Some people aren't bright enough because the messages go "read at so/so time". I have that occur to me one time when I was saying something to this girl (whom I'm no longer friends with) acts as if she didn't see my message and tried playing it off. I was like hello dear, technology is smart it shows you read the message. Anyhow, yes - I still think he's a crazy stalker and it isn't a coincidence! Even I live in the same community "exit" as like 6 family members within 3 miles radius and I probably run into them once a year, lol like at the market. I'm not often found driving behind them or dropping by their work places. He has some serious issues and I would want to knock some sense into my friends head! Does your friend find him attractive? Or, personality? It sounds totally creepy!!!
@ricki_911 (19950)
• Toronto, Ontario
21 Jan 16
@infatuatedbby I had mentioned that then he blocked me from sending messages.I think he knows, either he just doesn't know how to handle it or blaming her or something. Like his reply to my messages before were it took me a year to get a date with her, and you don't know half of what happened. Yet, when I said so tell me he would type (you know the ..... would show up then disappear). Now on Sunday we were at this girl dad house drinking (mind you were are of age), and rarely go out. So I had sent a picture of the two of us (was a cute picture). She starts talking more. I told her wait to see how long until this guy shows up. I think it is weird they have known each other about two years.So why is he so nervous and shy?.
1 person likes this
@trivia79 (7887)
• El Segundo, California
20 Jan 16
he lacks confidence I understand him. I am like him
@ricki_911 (19950)
• Toronto, Ontario
20 Jan 16
I do think he lacks security and confidence. But this has been going on almost 2 years now.
1 person likes this
@trivia79 (7887)
• El Segundo, California
21 Jan 16
@ricki_911 nothing will happen to him if he didn't try just a little bit. do the guy have crush on the gal?
@trivia79 (7887)
• El Segundo, California
20 Jan 16
he lacks confidence I understand him. I am like him
@ricki_911 (19950)
• Toronto, Ontario
21 Jan 16
I do think he lacks security and confidence. But this has been going on almost 2 years now.