Abuse

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Abuse comes in many forms. There is physical abuse, verbal abuse, mental abuse, and emotional abuse to both people and animals. There is disrespect and there is not caring about anyone but yourself and treating people as objects instead of people. In my lifetime I have been abused physically, mentally, emotionally, and verbally. On several occasions I have been the victim of someone's wrath and received broken ribs from the physical attack on my person. There is a saying we all learn as children - Sticks and stones will break the bones but words will never hurt you. I don't know who came up with that saying, but it is so wrong. Words hurt more and last longer than any broken bone ever will. The taunts and jeers go deep into your psyche to humiliate and make you feel incompetent and worthless. A person can go a full lifetime feeling like they will never amount to anything, or be able to achieve their dreams. They've been browbeaten so badly by every concept they ever thought of, that to ever voice an opinion about anything is furthest from the mind. Not to mention that if you do voice an opinion, it is completely ignored or treated with contempt. It has taken me a long time to come to terms with myself - to see myself as a person of worth, a person who has valid opinions and ideas, a person who can make something of her life. Today I need to come to terms again as disrespect and verbal abuse has once again crossed my doorstep. My anger lashed out in such a way as has not been seen in many years as I struck the person who taunted and jeered, and verbally shamed me yesterday. It is not something I am proud of. Quite the contrary, I am ashamed of my actions and how much the person provoked me to such action on my part. I have talked to two people about what took place yesterday. I learned something I didn't know or thought I did know, but was told different, when in fact what I did know, is in fact correct. Now did you follow that? I've spent a lifetime learning as everyone does, and what we learn we use to our advantage, stored away in our memories until we need it. Sometimes what we learn is used on a daily basis and doesn't need any amount of recall. However, there are those things we learn and store away that people can use to persuade us that what we know we don't know at all. Such was the case yesterday when I told the person to leave and if he didn't do so I would call the police. He simply told me I couldn't do that, and said I have no right to kick him out in winter. After talking to the first person, in order to calm down and get myself under control, I was told I could follow through and kick him out. There is no landlord/tenant agreement, and his name is not on the mortgage papers. Therefore I don't need to give him any kind of time frame to leave my home, and I can have the police escort him from my home and press charges against him. I am so tired of the abuse taking place in my life. It is one of the many reasons why I am in counseling - to find the person of worth I really am. Thank you for reading this and I hope you will have consideration for the people in your life and not abuse or shame them in any way, but give them the respect they deserve.