On My Mind!

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I have had a lot of things on my mind lately! It has been such a long 13 years going on 14 years with my husband wait? Since 2003? I am not good at math L.O.L. But I feel so bad because even though my Doctor claimed me permanently disabled I went to a court date and they denied me!! I have the disability letter and the disability license on my car and I got the letter from social security saying I was not recommended to a orthopedic surgeon which I was but it was after my court date! We have one car and my knees are so bad but what can I do? I can not walk too much! The Bus place got the not from my Doctor to go to therapy but forgot to send me the application! She sent it to me but I have no way of getting anywhere unless my Mother comes to take me I have been through too much to trust anyone as a friend and I hate asking anyone for anything that is how I am!My Mom lives 100 miles away in the Country and taking care of my dad he is disabled and in a wheel chair and I even hate asking her but she is coming to take me to the Doctor they recommend me to in 2 weeks, I feel like I am running out of time and out of options but at least when she comes I will be able to go and see what is wrong whether or not I will need knee surgery which I am sure of and what the ... is this big knot on my head??? On another note I am stressed to the max! Bored every day trying to work on line and my wrists are killing me! Stupid arthritis all over me! I need prayers please and thank you