painting the town red

December 7, 2017 3:39pm CST
I became a woman when I was exactly eleven and a half. One day I was collecting Care Bear stickers and the next I had blood in my knickers and an insatiable lust for boys. It's weird. It's a moment where you're on the cusp of adulthood, hormones darting chaotically around your body making you feel and want and desire, but you're also still a child with teddy bears on your bed and a need for cuddles from your mummy. You're not a child, nor an adult. You're just a flummoxed little girl who thought she was prepared, but wasn't. So the knickers went in the linen basket and the not yet a REAL woman waited for Mumsy to notice and give you those much needed cuddles. And why do I share this information with you? Because I've got a bloody massacre going on down there and I feel it's only fair to share. We never talk about this sort of stuff, yet without it we wouldnt exist. It's one of the most natural things women experience, but it's every bloody month, pun intentional. It's running to the loo every hour because you're worried you're leaking. It's the sadness which comes from thinking that maybe you were pregnant, but you're not. It's getting out of bed in the middle of the night because if you don't, you'll wake up in a puddle of yuck. It's sore boobies which desire the safety and protection of a bra, even at night. It's stuffing your face with comfort food. Honestly, the sooner I go through the menopause, the happier I'll be. Only a minimum of ten years to go, by my reckoning. One hundred and twenty-ish more months of clots and mess and the gushing flow of a seemingly never-ending stream. *sigh*
9 people like this
8 responses
@pgntwo (21708)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
7 Dec
The tears, tantrums and tortured tempers are another factor too, I have noticed. Bloody stupid, I think.
5 people like this
8 Dec
I'm an emotional and argumentative wreck anyway, so I don't tend to notice them in me. I know Husband notices.
3 people like this
@pgntwo (21708)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
8 Dec
@Poppylicious ...and has learned to bite his tongue...
1 person likes this
20h
@pgntwo Not quite, but he's nearly there!
1 person likes this
@xFiacre (10467)
• Ireland
7 Dec
@poppylicious I joked with myself when I read your title and chortled at the preposterous thought that you might be going to talk about "having the painters in" which was the euphemism used by girls at school here - I'm told. Then I read on and, my goodness, that's exactly what you were going to discuss.Oh dear, and at such a late hour too.
5 people like this
8 Dec
Oh yes. Having the painters in. Auntie Flo's visiting. My friend's come to stay. We were not very inventive when we didn't want the boys to know.
1 person likes this
@pgntwo (21708)
• Derry, Northern Ireland
7h
@Poppylicious @xFiacre Oh, the joys of having attended an all-boys school - I was spared such use of euphemism!
@Morleyhunt (16553)
• Canada
7 Dec
I feel your pain. You were young. My three older daughter all became "women the same year....first the 15 year old....two months later....the 11 year old and then the 13 year old a few months later.....hubby said...I knew I should have bought stock in Kotex!
5 people like this
8 Dec
Oh my goodness ... three hormonal girls in the house! Your poor husband!
1 person likes this
@Morleyhunt (16553)
• Canada
8 Dec
@Poppylicious plus me...make that four hormonal women. He survived!
3 people like this
@Corbin5 (81435)
• United States
7 Dec
I was a late-bloomer, age 16. I think I am still a late-bloomer in most areas.
3 people like this
8 Dec
I know I was the first amongst my friends. My best friend at the time was fifteen or sixteen. She used to suffer regular nosebleeds and her dad joked she should just stick a tampon up her nose because her body was obviously a bit dopey. Interestingly the nosebleeds stopped when she started her period. Bizarre.
3 people like this
@LadyDuck (121496)
• Switzerland
8 Dec
Those are not happy memories, I was also eleven and half, I was still a kid and knew nothing when it happened. Very wrong from my Mom to say nothing, I was terrified. The whole thing lasted until I was 54, I am free now.
1 person likes this
8 Dec
I can't wait to be free. I'm hoping my menopause will be quick and painless, as was my Mumma's.
2 people like this
@LadyDuck (121496)
• Switzerland
8 Dec
@Poppylicious Mine was quick and painless and I am very glad of this.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (35662)
• Gainesville, Florida
8 Dec
Although it's a natural part of life for every woman, I've always wondered why it has to be so painful and messy. Is that God's way of preparing your for the pain and mess of childbirth? Anyway, I know many women here in the US will get on the birth control pill to help ease the pain and flow of their periods; my own daughter started on the pill when she was 16, and it helped her tremendously.
1 person likes this
20h
I think it's just God's {or whomever} way of having a laugh. :)
@JESSY3236 (5020)
• United States
8 Dec
I started when I was nine. I hated it ever since. I had to get birth control to help with the pain. I sometimes can't wait for menopause.
1 person likes this
20h
Oh, bless you. Nine is so very young.
• Rochester, New York
8 Dec
Mary came to bully me at 13 years old. I hated her then and I still do now.
1 person likes this
8 Dec
She has a name?? I like. Edit: Oh, like Bloody Mary??