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Cupid, why did you shoot your love arrow Into the b(l)eating heart of my Stalker Despite the obvious fact I have no Romantic feelings for this smooth talker, Con-merchant, liar, and creep who can’t take A hint, follows me, bombards me with calls, Attacks my real friends, demands that I make Apologies for building barriers and walls, And requesting a restraining order So he stops trying to make me his wife Going from pest to full-on marauder Ruining my day, threatening my life. Eros, Cupid, please raise your bow again And shoot my stupid stalker in the brain. Arthur Chappell Note - this is the clean version. I have another take with a much angrier closing line that could not be used here