Why do people handle rejection poorly?
By Nnaemeka
@mydanods (6513)
Nigeria
March 7, 2018 5:29am CST
A friend of mine just got me wondering recently. I asked him after a date he was seeing and he started to nod his head. He said that he doesn’t understand why people handle rejection poorly.
I found that there was no connection between us, he told me. Forget her great figure and beautiful face. I had to text her and told her that it had to end. I was even sweet on her, wishing her that she would find a sweet guy after this. Do you know what I received in return?
No what?
I received a phone call and she was insulting and threatening me. Raining all sorts of abuses on me. It is now pretty obvious that no chemistry existed between us.
I couldn’t tell her why she reacted that way.
Why do people handle rejection poorly?
8 people like this
10 responses
@Kandae11 (53679)
•
7 Mar 18
@vandana7 Ha, Ha - you are so right. When I entered the workforce for the first time - young and a bit naive, I was a bit shocked when I heard on the grapevine that a staff member said she didn't like me. Why? I wondered, I thought I was lovable enough - especially with good looks and a bubbling personality.
3 people like this
@vandana7 (98827)
• India
7 Mar 18
I think his way of rejecting her through texting was rather high handed and frankly humiliating. You move on date, find what you like and dislike, and then sit together, and assess compatibility. His attitude on the other hand is like Richard Gere in Pretty Woman movie. Any rejection should come in person so that the person gets fair chance to give his or her side of the story. This was shabby treatment.
1 person likes this
@vandana7 (98827)
• India
7 Mar 18
@mydanods If he thought that, he could still have found a better way to say it...being honest helps. I cannot like people who do not look after elderly or who fight for small small thing or who flirt with so many people. Say it, have a clear scene give her the satisfaction and then walk out. If scene is expected why did he not expect her to call back. Odd.
1 person likes this
@sprite1950 (30453)
• Corsham, England
7 Mar 18
No one likes to be rejected but I do think that was rather an over reaction on her part. I think your friend was well out of it as she sounds like she has issues.
2 people like this
@sprite1950 (30453)
• Corsham, England
7 Mar 18
@mydanods I'm sure she will get over it. If she's very pretty she probably isn't used to rejection.
1 person likes this
@mydanods (6513)
• Nigeria
7 Mar 18
@sprite1950 Maybe. I pray she gets over it. It wasn't intended that she responds with insults and threats but that she understands the other side doesn't feel comfortable continuing the relationship and so wants it to end. It could be hard to understand.
1 person likes this
@jobelbojel (34729)
• Philippines
7 Mar 18
I don't like rejections. But as years passed by, I learned to understand their reasons.
2 people like this
@jobelbojel (34729)
• Philippines
8 Mar 18
@mydanods vandana7 most important thing is I learned from it and still learning.
1 person likes this
@just4him (306239)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
7 Mar 18
People are always hopeful for a good outcome. When rejection comes, it hurts more than a paper cut. You start thinking the worst of yourself, at least I do. I bring walls around me and shut people out. I don't lash out at anyone the way your friend experienced, but I know some people do. They want someone to love them, accept them for who they are, what they do, and when it doesn't happen, it's like the sky fell in on them. They lash out, and then they try harder to find the right connection.
1 person likes this
@mydanods (6513)
• Nigeria
7 Mar 18
It's true the way you described it. But after some time, as you came to realize, we decide that it must have been for the best that the relationship doesn't continue. If one party is not satisfied, we can't force that one to accept us. I'd want to know the reasons for a rejection if I was given one in a relationship.
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (85492)
• United States
8 Mar 18
It's all based on insecurity, and her behavior only shows the right decision was made. The only fault I can find is that it wasn't done in person. It's really not fair to refrain from facing a person when you want to break up, but I understand people are changing the way they do things nowadays.
1 person likes this
@mydanods (6513)
• Nigeria
7 Mar 18
That is the truth. At first one might think that it is a personal attack on his or her person. But as time goes by, that individual comes to realize that it was to prevent problems in the relationship in the future. Because two people are dating does not mean they are compatible. Rejection should be seen as one of the outcomes of dating.
1 person likes this
@ridingbet (66857)
• Philippines
7 Mar 18
maybe because she is used to being appreciated and praised.
1 person likes this
