Moving on and giving it to God
April 18, 2018 3:01am CST
There comes a point in life where you have to walk away from things and people you never thought you would walk away from. You have to look at the problem for what it is and stop letting it drag you down. You have to say "your problems are not my problems" to the people you want to help despite the fact that it hurts because you really want to help but sometimes the best way to help them is to not help them if that makes sense. Sometimes people will drag you down with them and you need to walk away before that happens. I can't control everything in my life despite maybe wanting to but I can control some things. I have always gone by the philosophy that everyone walks into your life for a reason, some to stay for a little while and some who will stay with you for the rest of your life or theirs. They will all help you grow in one way or another. Some will teach you true friendship and some will teach you what you don't want in life. Some will be great friends for a short while and while you cherish the memories you made with them you've grown and they can no longer be apart of your life because they are no longer what you need or vice versa. I could remain bitter about the people who have hurt me in the past but it's easier to believe they served a purpose whether good or bad. I wouldn't be who I am today without the good and the bad. I also believe you can love people from a distance. You can want better for people but not be apart of their lives because who they are in this moment is not what you need in your life currently. I wouldn't call this giving up on them but helping them realize who they need to be in order to be the kind of people they need to be to have certain relationships in their life. I am at the point in my life where I need to stop worrying about other peoples drama and try to focus on my own life and the lives of those closest to me. Sometimes people are past the point of any one person helping them and need to fail in order to eventually succeed. Sometimes the best thing people can do for them is walk away and let them fail and hit their own rock bottom without a safety net because it is the only way they'll learn. I love my brother and I only want what is best for him but I need to let his problems be his problems and not keep letting them make or break my day. He is where he is because he needs to be there right now. If he ends up in prison then that's where he needs to be. He needs to stop and think about how he got there. I'm debating on whether or not I should send him a letter and tell him how I feel. It's complicated because I want better for him but I am also angry. I am ready to make his problems his problems and not worry about it anymore, I'm going to do give it to God. His problems are his and God's and they are no longer my own. I can't control what my brother does only he can. God knows what is best for my brother and I have to believe he put my brother where he is. I know not everyone believes in God and that's your choice but times like this I can't imagine not having faith because it helps give me strength. If I didn't have my faith I would be a mess. So, this is me letting go and trying to not let anger consume me any longer. I am going to try my best to let it all go and believe that at the end of the day what happens will happen because it needs to and know that I am not in control, but God has this.
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You are right in saying that sometimes to help people is to let them be for a while. You did the best you think you could to help. The best thing you can do now is to pray for your brother. I pray all will be well for both of you and all the people involved.
@sissy15 My brother has experienced going to prison a few times, he did things to annoy our father and to get his attention but mainly because of the influence of his friends. The experience taught him a lot and now he's become a stronger and responsible person. We still pray for him, though, because sometimes temptations are just around the corner. Don't give up! Time will come when everything will be okay.
• United States
@neelia_lyn I hope he does but I don't foresee that day being anytime soon as he is angry with people for responding to his horrible behavior appropriately. He doesn't get that people don't want to see him because of the stuff he has done and he has yet to give a genuine apology.
• United States
Thank you, I think we all need to eventually come to the realization that sometimes we can't do anything but let it go because holding onto something you have no control over only drags you down. I know that I've felt a lot of stress fade when I wrote my brother the letter on which I'm debating on whether or not to send but just writing it freed me. I can't do anything about him or for him but pray and I've done that so now it's time to let go and live my life and stop worrying about something I have no control over. Whatever happens, happens. I think he is where he needs to be right now and I'm glad he isn't here causing more trouble and while I want better for him I also don't want to see him until he is ready for help and until that time I'm done and I'm done worrying over it. Time to get on with my life.