We Learned About Kidney Dialysis Today
@DeborahDiane (40056)
Laguna Woods, California
April 19, 2018 10:00pm CST
This afternoon, my husband and I spent four hours in a class learning about his kidney dialysis options. He has Stage 4 Chronic Kidney Disease and, probably within the next two or three years or sooner, the doctors expect him to go on dialysis.
The information we learned was overwhelming.
There are two reasons why they had us take the class now, even though my husband does not need dialysis, yet.
1. If he has another heart attack or other serious illness, he could go into kidney failure and require emergency dialysis. It is better if someone is prepared for regular dialysis, because it is less painful than what they have to do in an emergency.
2. There are a number of dialysis options and, depending on what you decide, it can take several months to arrange for the correct catheter, fistula or other device to be inserted in your body.
After the class, my husband and I went out to dinner to talk about everything we had learned.
The bottom line?
My husband decided to continue to carefully follow his restrictive diet, stick with the experimental medicine he is on, and see how long he can go without committing to dialysis. If he develops additional medical problems over the next few years, which is very possible, he may choose to never do dialysis at all.
It's been a tough day.
(The photo above was taken a couple of months ago in Las Vegas. It shows my husband and me, standing behind my 89 year old father. My husband looks healthy, doesn't he? You would never suspect how sick he really is.)
16 people like this
17 responses
@LadyDuck (458230)
• Switzerland
21 Apr 18
@DeborahDiane The longer he waits the better it is.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
21 Apr 18
@LadyDuck - Yes, the longer he waits, the better it is ... unless we wait too long and he has an emergency. It will be tricky to find exactly the right timing, although we are going to try.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
20 Apr 18
@LadyDuck - Yes, my husband looks very healthy, which is what makes kidney disease so strange. He jokes that he is the "healthiest looking sick guy around." LOL - I agree with his decision to try to stick to the diet and postpone dialysis as long as possible.
2 people like this
@bagarad (14283)
• Paso Robles, California
20 Apr 18
I'm so sorry to hear your husband has this. I know someone else who has a kidney disease who has been having dialysis treatments for years. He's still hanging in there, but, of course, he is very tired most of the time since he still leads a ministry.
I'm sure this must have been a very tough day for you.
2 people like this
@bagarad (14283)
• Paso Robles, California
21 Apr 18
@DeborahDiane For both your sakes, I hope so, too. I think my friend now is able to get his dialysis at home.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
21 Apr 18
@bagarad - From what we understand, home dialysis is easier and more comfortable, but there are still risks and the danger of infection is greater. There are no easy decisions around all this.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
20 Apr 18
@bagarad - Yes, it is difficult to think about what the future might hold. My husband continues to do OK without dialysis, but his numbers continue to drop, so we know it is inevitable that he will go on dialysis someday. Today's class was just so he would think about the type that he wants, because it takes a while to schedule the surgery for the tubes, etc. He has not made a decision, and we hope he has another year or two before he has to.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (130064)
• India
21 Apr 18
That is a huge thing to handle and one needs to be mentally prepared.
2 people like this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
21 Apr 18
@allknowing - You are absolutely right. It will take us a while to get mentally prepared for what this means.
2 people like this
@changjiangzhibin89 (16533)
• China
20 Apr 18
It is better to follow the doctors' advice,even though kidney dialysis is a quite a bother to him.
2 people like this
@changjiangzhibin89 (16533)
• China
21 Apr 18
@DeborahDiane It seems that the doctors think the earlier the better for him to do it,in case would develop into uraemia.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
21 Apr 18
@changjiangzhibin89 - Yes, they are pushing us to make a decision. My husband is not quite ready to do that, but eventually he will have to.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
20 Apr 18
Yes, once he starts dialysis, he will have to follow the doctors' advice very carefully. We are hoping he has another couple of years before he actually starts dialysis, but they wanted him to start thinking about the type of dialysis he wants.
2 people like this
@RasmaSandra (73473)
• Daytona Beach, Florida
20 Apr 18
A wonderful photo. Yes, you could not say he was sick. Many blessings to you both and will keep him in my prayers.
2 people like this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
20 Apr 18
@RasmaSandra - Thank you for your prayers. It seems strange to me to know how sick he is inside. He looks very healthy, which is what makes kidney disease so strange. He jokes that he is the "healthiest looking sick guy around." 
2 people like this
@JamesHxstatic (29242)
• Eugene, Oregon
21 Apr 18
Very difficult day for you. I am sorry about so much tough news for you both.
2 people like this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
21 Apr 18
@JamesHxstatic - Thanks, James. We thought we were handling all this pretty well when it was theoretical that someday he might have to go on dialysis. However, it is overwhelming to actually confront the reality. I hope we can just continue to postpone dialysis as long as possible.
2 people like this
@wolfgirl569 (95261)
• Marion, Ohio
20 Apr 18
I hope the diet and pills work so he does not need it for good reasons.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
20 Apr 18
@wolfgirl569 - I hope the diet the pills continue to work, too. Dialysis is not easy, no matter how he chooses to do it.
@wolfgirl569 (95261)
• Marion, Ohio
20 Apr 18
@DeborahDiane No I have a cousin who has been on it for years. She was not out of high school when she started. But she was able to finally get set up to do it at home. That means she can do it every day. She says she is a lot more comfortable now.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
20 Apr 18
@wolfgirl569 - Yes, the home dialysis does seem better than going to a dialysis center, but there are still risks and problems.
@mom210 (9036)
• United States
23 Apr 18
@DeborahDiane I think that is where a lot of retired people mess up, that sitting around is no good. It is best to stay on the go and busy.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
24 Apr 18
@mom210 - I agree with you. Most of the people in our retirement community are very active. However, there are people who just sit around and watch TV. That is so bad for them. They tend to be unhappy and lonely. They also die sooner.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
23 Apr 18
@mom210 - Yes, 89 years of life is a good run, and he continues to keep busy!
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
1 May 18
@just4him - Thanks! When my sister takes my Dad to the casino once in a while, there are women there who hang out with him the whole time. He might be 89, but he still attracts the women! LOL
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
3 May 18
@just4him - Yes, my Dad pretends not to be interested in the women, but I think he feels flattered! LOL
1 person likes this
@just4him (306386)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
2 May 18
@DeborahDiane That must make him feel young. 
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
30 Apr 18
@JudyEv - We also hope it is a long, long time before he needs to go on dialysis, but it is more likely it will happen within the next two or three years. It worries us, but we are trying to make a smart decision.
1 person likes this
@Hannihar (129481)
• Israel
19 Jul 18
@DeborahDiane
Deborha-Diane that must be hard for the both of you. He has a healthy attitude about what he has to do. That is the thing people may look like they are fine on the outside but nobody but them or the person close to them knows what is going on in the inside.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
19 Jul 18
@Hannihar - I agree. Sometimes my husband actually criticizes people who are parked in Handicapped Parking spots, but do not "look" sick. I point out to him that lots of people do not look sick, but they cannot walk long distances. My husband doesn't look sick, but he is. He, of all people, should realize that.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
21 Jul 18
@Hannihar - Yes, but sometimes my husband thinks that it is a spouse, child or friend using the car and not the handicapped person. I just tell him there is no way to know for sure. You just can't tell if a person has a heart-condition, or has had a recent surgery or other medical problem.
1 person likes this
@Hannihar (129481)
• Israel
20 Jul 18
@DeborahDiane
Don't handicapped people have stickers in their cars?
1 person likes this
@anamika161088 (11868)
• India
2 May 18
Beautiful family pic. Hope you won't need dialysis to be done
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
3 May 18
It is very likely that my husband will need dialysis in another year or so. We are trying to prepare ourselves, although we do not like the idea.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
4 May 18
@anamika161088 - Yes, we need to prepare for the inevitable. Things happen, and it makes no sense to ignore them.
1 person likes this
@anamika161088 (11868)
• India
3 May 18
@DeborahDiane There are things which can't be avoided so better to be prepared.
1 person likes this
@Jessabuma (31700)
• Baguio, Philippines
24 Jul 18
Ohh thank you for sharing this.. nice photo there
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
24 Jul 18
@Jessabuma - Thank you. I'm glad you enjoyed the photo!
1 person likes this
@ivanituut (1934)
•
20 Apr 18
Hope you're husband will get through all of that, just pray
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
20 Apr 18
@ivanituut - Thank you. I pray he does get through all of this.
1 person likes this
@Iam_jauntyjen (4951)
•
20 Apr 18
i know some if my mom's friends who undergo dialysis. one of them needs it once a week.Each session cause about 6,000.That cost an arm and a leg.
I hope my husband would be like your hubby who watches his diet.My husband is very stubborn and he gives me stress whenever I see him eat fatty food.He is obese and has been diagnosed with fatty liver.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
20 Apr 18
We are lucky that we have good insurance which will pay for the dialysis. Otherwise, we could not afford it. I can understand why you are worried about your husband. Fatty liver disease can be very serious.
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
22 Apr 18
Yes, appearances can be deceptive.
Diabetes and high blood pressure affect kidneys and also eyes.
I have diabetes and take reasonable care.
I have friends who have been undergoing dialysis for years as kidney transplant has a long waiting list.
I do hope your husband is able to maintain good health for years ahead - siva
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
23 Apr 18
@Shiva49 - Yes, diabetes, high blood pressure and kidney disease all seem to be related. Dialysis is very stressful. I hope my husband can continue to maintain his health, too.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (40056)
• Laguna Woods, California
20 Apr 18
@Dena91 - Thank you for your prayers. Emergency dialysis is supposed to be extra uncomfortable. We want to avoid that. We want to avoid all dialysis, if we can, but it looks like it will be inevitable in another year or two.
1 person likes this
