still alive

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(Now I have the song from "Portal" stuck in my head.) I would ask what else can go wrong right now, but I'm afraid of the answer I might get. The head gasket blew on the van. Bye bye, van! Bye bye, money we needed for other things, but now has to be used to replace the van! I wasn't able to call my mom for Mother's Day because the nursing home doesn't have a handset in her room. Apparently most of the residents use cell phones. I don't know how they expect someone with advanced Alzheimer's to manage a cell phone. The youngest school age boy was involved in an altercation at school and was suspended for a day. We found out at 7:20 this morning when the principal called. They didn't send home a note. Apparently the school called last night, but we didn't recognize the number, it was dinnertime so we didn't answer, and no message was left. Our lawn mower gave up the ghost. Somehow our weed wacker got broken while in the garage (I suspect one of the kids broke it when they put bikes away). Tonight's dinner burned and stuck to the Instant Pot liner. It's the first time I've ever gotten an error message on the Instant Pot. I slipped on the bathroom floor today in a most spectacular fashion, landing hard and awkwardly on the side of the tub, squarely on a penguin toy which was filled with water, which squirted everywhere and soaked my jeans. Not only did I severely injure my pride, but I wrenched the hip that I injured last month. I think I'd like to exchange the month of May for a different one. This month is broken. At least I found an amusing meme.